Niki1

When I was growning up in Jacksonville, Fla., there were severel aircraft carriers stationed at Mayport Naval Station. On almost every cruise, there was a story of some maintenance crewman ejecting himself into the overhead of the hanger deck. Don't know if it was the same story retold but if it was it was retold a lot. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, 'Harry, what's your problem?' Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!' Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test. Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?' Harry: '9.' Principal: 'What is 6 x 6?' Harry: '36.' And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, 'I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade.' Ms. Brooks says to the principal, 'Let me ask him some questions.' The principal and Harry both agreed. Ms. Brooks asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?' Harry, after a moment: 'Legs.' Ms. Brooks: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?' The principal wondered why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: 'Pockets.' Ms. Brooks: 'What does a dog do that a man steps into?' Harry: 'Pants.' Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?' Harry: 'Coconut.' The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open. Ms. Brooks: 'What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?' The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied, 'Bubble gum.' Ms. Brooks: 'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?' Harry: 'Shake hands'. The principal was trembling. Ms. Brooks: 'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?' Harry: 'Firetruck.' The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, 'Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong... Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

I believe that it's a good thing to have the same instructor all the way through most any course of instruction. I think the student learns better with the consistancy of everything down to the use of words and phrasiology. Not all instructoes relate well to all students. After AFF is when it's time to put a foot out in the world and see how other people do it, talk about it, and explain it. All of this presuposes an approach of positive reinforcement concentrating of the things done correctly. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

I recognize Mike Patterson (Rumson) in the orange and Larry Gosler in the middle in red. In black on one knee, that sure looks like Fred Cruess, an Air Traffic Controler from Jacksonville. He jumped at Palatka when we all wound up there after Bobby Tier had exhausted all the other options in north Florida. Do you know if this is the same guy? Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Phone hem and tell him that his girlfreinds car is on fire. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

That's what I meant. Shit on a Shingle. I was trying to pay attention to my wife as I tried to respond. Didn't do either well. Although there were things in the mess hall that would make you shit a shingle.

Was it just me or did that thing look more than a little unstable. How much control does the rider have? Does shifting his weight have an effect? The speed of the boat is obvious but I'm thinking that lockout will occur at a shallow angle, maybe 20 degrees off the line of the boat. But besides that, it looks like something I would've wanted to do. Thirty Five years ago when I was indestructable.

I don't know why they called "Chipped Beef on Toast" Shit - A -Shingle. I happened to like it. Usually needed to put some (a lot of) pepper on it. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Well, I wouldn't agree with that entirely.. He probably learned a lot about leadership; working in teams; doing/managing "projects"; seeing things through.. He probably met people from all walks of life and is able to socialise with people at all levels (be that a poor private or a high-ranking officer, or someone from an entirely different country/culture).. I mean.. Those skills aren't "obvious", but I don't know many civilian jobs where people/leadership skills aren't an asset. Those shouldn't be underestimated, but they are often overlooked. Well said. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

No reason to stress about it. Except for the money part. Everything on an airplane costs 3 or 4 times as much as most people think, You should be getting pats on the back and a lot of ATABOYS. There have been a lot fo much more severe results from much more minor events. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Yeah. I think that would probably guaraty that you ain't gettin' laid that night.

The answer to life, the universe and everything. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Jack Sparrow? You're the worst pirate I've ever heard of. But you HAVE heard of me. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Dude! You have way too much time on your hands. Keep up the good work.

I heard about a girl student at DeLand about '69. She left a suicide note explaining what she was going to do. The parents found it and didn't bother to call the airport. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

I don't think that was Longfellow, Poe or Kipling. Maybe Suess or Ogdan Nash. Can you say it real fast?

A mans ambition must be small To write his name on a bathroom wall. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

and know for my favorite quote by sir winston churchill P.M (a conversation between sir winston churchill and mary arkwright a famous suffragette [suffragettes were a big womans movement in the 1920's) mary arkwright " sir you are as drunk as a lord" winston churchill" Madam! i maybe drunk, but i will wake up sober! however you will always be that ugly" Another by Sir Winston from much the kind of setting: A Lady says to Churchhill, "Winston, if you were my husband I would give you poison." To which Churchhill replies, "Madam, if I were your husband, I would drink it." But on to one of my favorite poets. I found this Shel Silverstien poem in the Jan. 1973 issue of Playboy. The Great Smoke Off In the laid back California town of sunny San Rafael Lived a girl named Pearly Sweetcake, you prob’ly knew her well. She’d been stoned fifteen of her eighteen years and the story was widely told That she could smoke 'em faster than anyone could roll. Her legend finally reached New York, that Grove Street walk-up flat Where dwelt The Calistoga Kid, a beatnik from the past With long browned lightnin’ fingers he takes a cultured toke And says, “Hell, I can roll ‘em faster, Jim, than any chick can smoke!” So a note gets sent to San Rafael, “For the Championship of the World The Kid demands a smoke off!” "Well, bring him on!" says Pearl, "I'll grind his fingers off his hands, he'll roll until he drops!" Says Calistog, "I'll smoke that twist till she blows up and pops!” So they rent out Yankee Stadium and the word is quickly spread "Come one, come all, who walk or crawl, price – just two lids a head And from every town and hamlet, over land and sea they speed The world's greatest dopers, with the Worlds greatest weed Hashishers from Morocco, hemp smokers from Peru And the Shamnicks from Bagun who puff the deadly Pugaroo And those who call it Light of Life and those that call it boo. See the dealers and their ladies wearing turquoise, lace, and leather See the narcos and the closet smokers puffin’ all together From the teenies who smoke legal to the ones who've done some time To the old man who smoked “reefer” back before it was a crime And the grand old house that Ruth built is filled with the smoke and cries Of fifty thousand screaming heads all stoned out of their minds. And they play the national anthem and the crowd lets out a roar As the spotlight hits The Kid and Pearl, ready for their smokin' war At a table piled up high with grass, as high as a mountain peak Just tops and buds of the rarest flowers, not one stem, branch or seed. Maui Wowie, Panama Red and Acapulco Gold. Kif from East Afghanistan and rare Alaskan Cold. Sticks from Thailand, Ganja from the Islands, and Bangkok's Bloomin' Best. And some of that wet imported shit that capsized off Key West. Oaxacan tops and Kenya Bhang and Riviera Fleurs. And that rare Manhatten Silver that grows down in the New York sewers. And there's bubblin’ ice cold lemonade and sweet grapes by the bunches. And there's Hershey’s bars, and Oreos, ‘case anybody gets the munchies. And the Calistoga Kid, he sneers, and Pearley, she just grins. And the drums roll low and the crowd yells “GO!” and the world’s first Smoke Off begins. Kid flicks his magic fingers once and ZAP! that first joint’s rolled. Pearl takes one drag with her mighty lungs and WOOSH! that roach is cold. Then The Kid he rolls his Super Bomb that’d paralyze a moose. And Pearley takes one super hit and SLURP! that bomb’ defused. Then he rolls three in just ten seconds and she smokes 'em up in nine, And everybody sits back and says, "This just might take some time." See the blur of flyin’ fingers, see the red coal burnin’ bright As the night turns into mornin’ and the mornin’ fades to night And the autumn turns to summer and a whole damn year is gone But the two still sit on that roach-filled stage, smokin' and rollin' on With tremblin’ hands he rolls his jays with fingers blue and stiff She coughs and stares with bloodshot gaze, and puffs through blistered lips. And as she reaches out her hand for another stick of gold The Kid he gasps, "Goddamn it, bitch, there's nothin' left to roll!" "Nothin’ left to roll?", screams Pearl, "Is this some twisted joke?” “I didn't come here to fuck around, man, I come here to SMOKE!" And she reaches 'cross the table And grabs his bony sleeves And she crumbles his body between her hands like dried and brittle leaves Flickin' out his teeth and bones like useless stems and seeds And then she rolls him in a Zig Zag and lights him like a roach. And the fastest man with the fastest hands goes up in a puff of smoke. In the laid-back California town of sunny San Rafael Lives a girl named Pearly Sweetcake, you prob’ly know her well. She’s been stoned twenty-one of her twenty-four years, and the story’s widely told. How she still can smoke them faster than anyone can roll While off in New York City on a street that has no name. There's the hands of the Calistoga Kid in the Viper Hall of Fame And underneath his fingers there's a little golden scroll That says, Beware of Bein’ the Roller When There's Nothin’ Left to Roll. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Amen!! And something I quote often once a year: "Christmas is a poor excuse to stick your hand in a mans pocket every 25th of December. Everyone who goes about with Christmas on their lips should be buried with a stake of holly in their heart." The people who know me aren't supprised that I can quote Ebenizer Scrooge.

Quigley Down Under Tom Selleck:"My stomach thinks my throats been cut." Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Just came from the Movie Quotes thread but the advice from Animal House come to mind. "I advise you to start drinking heavily." And the guy on here with the signature line, "You can't stay drunk all day unless you start early."

One of my favorite quotes? "Rommel, you magnificent bastard, I read your book!" Could anyone else have played that part so believably? I came out of the theater thinking I had witnessed George Patton. Here's one from, I think, Ruthless People. The Danny DeVito character is talking to some one (his lawyer?) in his office. He's interupted by the phone and he answers it. "Hello. No Denise can't come to the phone right now.because my dick is in her mouth." He hangs up and says, "I love wrong numbers." Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Think you used enough dynomite there, Butch? Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid _____________________________________- Certainty of death? Small chance of success? What are we waiting for? Lord of the Rings (Sorry. I forget which book.) _______________________________________ Clatu Barada Nictu This ones a test for the old farts. Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket?

Santini, "He's still following us?! That's Infeasible!" Diago, "You keep usin that word, I do not think it means what you think it means." Princess Bride Wow, you got that all wrong. First, the word is "inconceivable," Not "infeasible." Second, it's Vizzini, not Santini. Third, it's Inigo, not Diago. Well, it was a bootleg copy that I saw.