Deuce

Yo! Chickie-mama? Take some Pepto-Bytchmol. It soothes and protects! I'm a Bytch, I'm a Bytch, cause I'm better than you! It's the way that I move! It's the way that I groove! Whoa-oh-oh!

Wow! And I though the MADD group was tough!* *Humorous barb intended.

Iv'e told this one before, but a jumper just off of AFF jumped without gloves at about zero dgrees at altitude. Her hands wend numb during freefall and she couldn't feel the hackey. Had to go to silver. Couldn't feel that either, but she could see that she had it.

That's interesting. How often do you think about sex?

Careful. Left in this condition, it might not be sprinklers waking you up.

Don't be foolish. History is replete with scary Canadians. There's ....uh,..and...hmmmm.

B-squared? What's a Mokey?

Probably no need to bring your tuke (sp?)

Good knowledge. This is why suspects get shot so many times, when they get shot. "Shoot the target down". With a semi-automatic this means 10 to 15 rounds per shooter. "Police fire 40 rounds at suspect" 4 officers X 2 seconds of fire each = duh.

Get some Depends..... No way Dude. I'm wearing a wetsuit. It makes me feel good all over.

Yep.

I'm definite. Got approval from the Chief Planning Officer last night at dinner. I'll be there Thursday night through Sunday afternoon. We will launch a Ballerina Go-Go Cage, and it will be on video. I will have a second rig. I will do 10 jumps a day for three days. Stearman. Balloon. (Two cases of beer) I am pissing my pants.

I was prepared for much wierder. I read "Clay" and "Stuffed sheep" and I'm afraid I'm going to see another really scary picture of Clay "stuffing" a sheep. Cute collection. Never let Clay over.

(I just reread this and I apologize in advance,this is a dark post) I never got a chance to go to Thunder Ranch for the carbine class. The training is cheaper than learning to skydive. Staying current is cheaper too. Now that I'm not needing that skill set everyday, though, I'm selling most of my stuff. I got a Dillon progressive if anybody wants to make an offer. While marksmanship is important, it's the decision making that is paramount. Towards the end of my career we had this cool simulator that let you shoot at movies of scenarios. That training was really cheap, tested your sight picture, but didn't do a good job of recapturing sight picture after recoil. Anyhow, I think most folks who could handle a chainsaw could handle a pistol. It's not everybody, but it's most people. And BillV, you're right as usual, there are pistol safes that are faster than holsters, I just don't know if the space is available in a cockpit ,as currently configured, to put one. It could certainly be retrofitted. And Diverdriver, you'd be much more comfortable on a non-stop not having to wear it. Come to think of it, the shotgun release was hidden in plain site in the squadcar, nobody could find it on an aircraft panel! That's a hoot! Put an 870 on the panel! Har. Introducing a loaded weapon into situations didn't always go as planned. We'd pull the shotgun out, rack a round in (that's why we called it the crowd-pleaser) CHA-CLACK! And then people would do anything from charging you to shitting their pants to running away. Brandishing is a uniformly bad idea. Pointing a gun at somebody and ordering them to do something is no guarantee at all that they will obey you. On occasion they will smile and say DO IT! and so you'd better be justified in doing it, and not creating a lethal force situation where one didn't exist befoe you bootstrapped it. So when they kill first stewardess, blow the cockpit door with plastique, and enter the cockpit with a stewardess whose left eye they have cut out and it's hanging down her face, she's screaming for you to help her,and the thug is saying drop the pistol or she dies, you say "fuck you!" he slashes her throat to the spine and you put one right into his right eyesocket. The other terrorist is now slashing his way through business class while the passengers are trying to subdue him. A bleeding passenger charges you demanding you help him, cause he's bleeding, but you have to shoot him because you don't know if he's a terrorist, and he won't respond to commands, and he won't stop closing on the unsecure cockpit. You MUST protect the flight controls. The slasher in the cabin is eventually overcome and murdered by the passengers and you divert to the nearest field. The plan was to crash your widebody into a stadium. You saved tens of thousands of lives, but you had to watch a friend die, and lawfully, but wrongfully kill an innocent passenger. People buy weapons and tell themselves "this is what I'm gonna do when "X" happens. It never works that way. "X" capriciously decides what its going to do to you, and you can only do your best. I had a lady throw her newborn baby at me from a distance of about 15 feet during a traffic stop because she had a warrant out for her arrest, and didn't want to spend the weekend in jail. Man that's even wierder than expressing breastmilk,now that I remember it. Anyhow, the pistol is just a tool, and it makes holes in things. It's useful to have when you need to put a hole in something. Otherwise, I trust, in general, the judgement of commercial pilots that I want them to have that tool, and the commitment to do and endure murder to protect the control of the aircraft. Never let me post from home. When I'm not interrupted, I just ramble on forever.. Who's in the pub?

Damn Nathan! You will be poised and ready come 6 PM, wontcha!?

Aooooo-rah! That's the best thing I've read all day. Thanks for sharing

And now you go to the house of Gah-aa-aaa-aaa-aaad?

Wow. We're on fire today! Hump day or what? In California the Penal Code (remember that scene from Kentucky Fried Movie?) allows cops to shoot "fleeing felons". Pfft! It's a felony to write a bad check. "Hey! this is a bad check! Come back here!" BLAM! Pretty stupid. You'd lose your job and probably get prosecuted. If it was determined that the culprit (Perry Mason word) was about to commit a violent felony, and the danger to the public posed by shooting at the theif was outwieghed by the impending felony, shoot away. Like an armed bank robber leaving a scene. Or if the car was being used as a weapon by trying to run people over. I don't think the fella will be prosecuted. If it was clear that no one else was endangered by him shooting at his own car while occupied by a thief, he's within his rights. You can defend your property with force. But if he was busting caps at his car with people and businesses on both sidewalks he's an idiot, and proof that all y'all are more qualified to carry guns than a whole lot of folks that have CCW permits

My kids have something better than I had. It took me a while. It's this track thing that you set up with a ball-bearing. The ball goes down the track and hits all kinds of cool kinetic stuff and eventually makes it down into a collector. Really neat Rube-Goldberg stuff. I like it better than the legos, cause it's not like building a model, it's a box full of stuff you make into something cool. How bout Hotwheels when it was just cars, yellow track and the red tongue things you never had enough of? Enough of that track and any kind of hill and you were in business!

OK, I am licensed to carry a gun in California. Beat that! I'm highly trained, having completed the basic, intermediate, and advanced tactical pistol courses at Gunsite in Arizona. I did the police training too, for over a decade, but that is mostly marksmanship, not tactical decision training. Virtually all you people could do that too. I could never quite figure out why so many people want cops to be armed, but want to forbid joanie-citizen to be able to carry. The what-if scenarios always end up with people lobbing hand grenades or suitcase nukes. You're just hosed if that happens, plain and simple. On September 11, 2001 some bad guys slashed some nice stewardesses necks open and showered the interior of the aircraft with their hot copper-smelling human blood. Most folks went into shock and obeyed. If you've ever been unfortunate to see an open carotid or femoral artery you know what I'm talking about. Think kitchen sink rinse thingie on full blast, and think hot. It also has a smell that wakes something up in the base of your brain. It's the smell of childbirth, but bad. A bunch of guns at that point would not have been a bad thing. Since they caught us with that slashing trick once, it will never happen again. Yes, people will risk injury rather than risk death. The really tough thing about being a cop is getting ready to kill somebody every single day. The purpose of the pistol is euphemistically to"stop" a threat, but realistically it's to kill a human. Putting the pistol on and saying "OK, I'm ready to kill somebody if I have to" kills something inside most people when they say it to themself several times a day everyday. Soldiers kill on the battlefield, but cops have to be ready to kill anywhere, anytime, on behalf of strangers. An armed, qualified, citizenry that can defend itself is preferable to a citizenry that farms that duty out to subcontractors. You know what I miss? The 1994 Chevy Caprice with the 5.7 engine. Cop-car driving! Yeah!

Bill Murray voice: "I'm gonna miss you"

I only smoke medicinal crack I get from the Mayor of Santa Cruz. I'm not quite psychotic enough....

Back when we were trying to emulate everything Japanese, and car manufacturing plant in Kentucky or somewhere was damaged by a severe hailstorm. Most of the windows were cracked. The Japanese executive in charge was sent back to the Island nation because his order to replace the panes in the windows was misinterpreted and all the lawns were torn out and replaced with sod. (Japanese accent) We need all new glass. Might be an urban legend,

Does the phrase "when hell freezes over" do enough to express my utter disdain for that idea? Neat! That means the headlights will be "ON" ! Whoo-hooo! Hi Lisa! Pepto-Bytchmol! Whaa-haaaa! *KISS*!

I have a poster of it that covers the entire interior of my garage door. Come on over and have a beer! JP