davjohns

He's hysterical. I once said something to the effect, "I've got twenty bucks that says that won't happen." He said, "You would be wrong...you AND your freakish talking money." Very quick wit. I was once driving down a lonely road with a girl I was seeing sitting in the front seat of the truck between me and my teen daughter. Out of nowhere, I said, "You know we're taking you out here to kill you, right?" Without missing a beat, my daughter stuck her hand in front of the girl's face and said, "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" I died laughing. The girl didn't think it was funny. Beginning of the end for her. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I'm glad the boogie was a success. I'm just not sure what I think about making a big deal over the division of people's sexual preferences. I know there are still issues out there regarding prejudices toward gay people. I'm just not entirely sure highlighting this stuff is helping. I like good people and hanging out with them. How they have sex only matters if I plan on being involved with that. Anyway...glad everyone had fun. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I have to admit to having peed in a bottle while driving. But that was an emergency. And that was more than I ever wanted to know about Ms. Spears... I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I was talking to my adult son yesterday. I mentioned to him something I did several months ago. I was attempting to have a relationship with someone when I put down on paper the things I needed in a relationship, things I liked and things I could not deal with. I talked about how to handle finances, leisure time and all kinds of things. Kind of a manual on my perfect relationship. Many things can be worked out / are negotiable, but I thought it was good to get some things out there for discussion. It didn't go quite like I thought. My son tells me I should go to the DMV and tell them that story. He says they will then give me a tag that will identify me as so incredibly handicapped that I can park wherever / whenever I want. I guess it's the guy vs. girl thing. I thought a clear understanding of what the other person is thinking would be a good thing. Of course, when I was married to my son's mother, she would change the rules (not kidding) so I would always be wrong. So I guess some people would not want the rules to be clear. So...what was your clearest indication that you weren't quite as good at relationships as you thought? I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Haven't seen you around in a while. Missed your sense of humor. :) I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I didn't know we allowed turtle porn on this site. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I use to fight in martial arts tournaments regularly. There was always someone who wanted to play that song. I learned to hate it. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Seems to me a cheaper, easier and quicker way of saving lives with auto modifications is to put speed limiters on them so people can not exceed the highest speed available on the freeway. Costs next to nothing, there's no excuse for not wanting one and everything I've seen indicates speed is a leading contributor to auto fatalities. Personally, I prefer the idea of individuals being responsible for themselves and a legal system that provide reasonable and consistent punishment for transgressions. Seems this proposal deems that unlikely, I think my idea has more merit than this one. If you wanted to get really cute, you could put GPS in the car that knows where you are and the speed limit there so you can't exceed the limit anywhere. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

The statistic, by itself, is near meaningless. D License holders are generally the ones making more jumps. Take a deck of cards. Shuffle it. Pick a card at random. Every single time you pick a card, you have a 1 in 52 chance of picking the Ace of Spades. Every single time. However, while it's possible that you could go hundreds of rounds and never pick the Ace of Spades, it's far more likely that eventually you will, regardless of what you may have been taught about "Gambler's Paradox." The ratio stays approximately the same averaged out over every round. Eventually you will almost certainly pick the Ace of Spades. People with A licenses generally don't stay that way for very long. People with D license tend to stay that way for a very long time and accumulate far more jumps than they did as A licensed skydivers. I think you made a leap of inference there and slightly missed the fine point of probability statistics. The deck of cards does not know how many times you have pulled a card. Neither does the Ace of spades. Every time you pull a card out of a fresh deck, your odds are 1:52. Every time. In relation to your comment, an equal number of A, B, C and D licensed jumpers should die every year (given an equal number exists within each category). If there are more A licenses than others, there should be a greater number of dead A license holders at the end of each year. For your argument to hold, the most prolific license in the sport should be a D license by the measure that 83% of jumpers hold a D license. I have done no research, but highly doubt that is the case. Even then, we are talking about pure probability without any consideration of skill, experience or maturity in the sport. If you factor those in, theoretically, D license holders would be the least likely to die per capita. The wind, ground, rig, etc. have no idea if it is your first jump or 10,000th. They don't care. But what is the probability that you will NOT have pulled an ace of spades at least once after 1,000 attempts? (answer, 3.7 x 10^-9). Meaning that after 1000 picks you have 99.9999996% likelihood of having pulled at least one ace of spades. That's mathematically correct. Now, apply it to skydiving. In order for the same rules to hold, death must be an inevitable outcome of skydiving in a certain number of jumps regardless of conditions, skill, judgment, etc. To apply the same logic as the deck of cards, death must be an equal probability as every other potential option. In other words, why do we bother with training, testing, licensing, rules, etc. if we can not change the odds? I looked over the reasons for death in the statistics. One of them showed that the person removed their rig during the jump (suicide). For the reasoning offered to hold, this must have been inevitable and not a choice. That card merely came out of the deck in it's statistically probable order. Jump long enough and you are just going to take off your rig regardless of any other factor. Nope. You misunderstand the concept of probabilities. Wow. Your informational cites and pure logic overwhelmed my reasoned arguments and experience. I give up. I'll also quit teaching math and stop doing statistical analysis for a living. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

The statistic, by itself, is near meaningless. D License holders are generally the ones making more jumps. Take a deck of cards. Shuffle it. Pick a card at random. Every single time you pick a card, you have a 1 in 52 chance of picking the Ace of Spades. Every single time. However, while it's possible that you could go hundreds of rounds and never pick the Ace of Spades, it's far more likely that eventually you will, regardless of what you may have been taught about "Gambler's Paradox." The ratio stays approximately the same averaged out over every round. Eventually you will almost certainly pick the Ace of Spades. People with A licenses generally don't stay that way for very long. People with D license tend to stay that way for a very long time and accumulate far more jumps than they did as A licensed skydivers. I think you made a leap of inference there and slightly missed the fine point of probability statistics. The deck of cards does not know how many times you have pulled a card. Neither does the Ace of spades. Every time you pull a card out of a fresh deck, your odds are 1:52. Every time. In relation to your comment, an equal number of A, B, C and D licensed jumpers should die every year (given an equal number exists within each category). If there are more A licenses than others, there should be a greater number of dead A license holders at the end of each year. For your argument to hold, the most prolific license in the sport should be a D license by the measure that 83% of jumpers hold a D license. I have done no research, but highly doubt that is the case. Even then, we are talking about pure probability without any consideration of skill, experience or maturity in the sport. If you factor those in, theoretically, D license holders would be the least likely to die per capita. The wind, ground, rig, etc. have no idea if it is your first jump or 10,000th. They don't care. But what is the probability that you will NOT have pulled an ace of spades at least once after 1,000 attempts? (answer, 3.7 x 10^-9). Meaning that after 1000 picks you have 99.9999996% likelihood of having pulled at least one ace of spades. That's mathematically correct. Now, apply it to skydiving. In order for the same rules to hold, death must be an inevitable outcome of skydiving in a certain number of jumps regardless of conditions, skill, judgment, etc. To apply the same logic as the deck of cards, death must be an equal probability as every other potential option. In other words, why do we bother with training, testing, licensing, rules, etc. if we can not change the odds? I looked over the reasons for death in the statistics. One of them showed that the person removed their rig during the jump (suicide). For the reasoning offered to hold, this must have been inevitable and not a choice. That card merely came out of the deck in it's statistically probable order. Jump long enough and you are just going to take off your rig regardless of any other factor. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I did tunnel time before AFF. I think it helped. I had a pretty good / stable position from the beginning and could better focus on my tasks. Not that I recall much focus on my first jump.... I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I always stop for women and older people on the highway. I've changed lots of tires. I once stopped for a very pregnant woman on a busy expressway in rush hour traffic. She had been standing beside her car for 45 minutes. It was a simple flat. I gave her my cell to call work and her husband while I changed the tire. She was on her way in ten minutes. A couple of months later, I was pulling into a parking space at the drive in theater with my family when I saw a man approaching the car on my (then) wife's side. He asked if her husband was David Johnson. She told him I was. I slipped my pistol into my waistband as he came around to my side. He said someone wanted to meet me. I followed him a couple of cars down the row to where the woman and her infant child were. She had spotted me rolling past, remembered me and my name and sent her husband to get me. I change tires for people because I hope someone would stop for my daughter or parents if needed. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

A resounding NO! In order for that logic to work, it must be mandatory that someone die every X number of jumps, regardless of skill, equipment maintenance, weather, decision making, etc. A penny flipped fifty times in a row that comes up heads every time is still 50% likely to come up heads (or tails) the next time because those are the only options and they are equally viable. The penny has no idea how many times it has been flipped. There is no mandatory death in skydiving. None of the factors that go into a successful dive and landing have a mandatory fail...ever. Therefore, it is not logically supported to say that making more jumps increases your risk of failure. I know people like to think this way. It seems intuitive. It is also wrong. If this logic worked, there would be no need for accident investigations. The cause would always be law of probability. To look at fatalities this way assumes that all jumps, jumpers, equipment and conditions are equal on every jump. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

The statistic, by itself, is near meaningless. D License holders are generally the ones making more jumps. Take a deck of cards. Shuffle it. Pick a card at random. Every single time you pick a card, you have a 1 in 52 chance of picking the Ace of Spades. Every single time. However, while it's possible that you could go hundreds of rounds and never pick the Ace of Spades, it's far more likely that eventually you will, regardless of what you may have been taught about "Gambler's Paradox." The ratio stays approximately the same averaged out over every round. Eventually you will almost certainly pick the Ace of Spades. People with A licenses generally don't stay that way for very long. People with D license tend to stay that way for a very long time and accumulate far more jumps than they did as A licensed skydivers. I think you made a leap of inference there and slightly missed the fine point of probability statistics. The deck of cards does not know how many times you have pulled a card. Neither does the Ace of spades. Every time you pull a card out of a fresh deck, your odds are 1:52. Every time. In relation to your comment, an equal number of A, B, C and D licensed jumpers should die every year (given an equal number exists within each category). If there are more A licenses than others, there should be a greater number of dead A license holders at the end of each year. For your argument to hold, the most prolific license in the sport should be a D license by the measure that 83% of jumpers hold a D license. I have done no research, but highly doubt that is the case. Even then, we are talking about pure probability without any consideration of skill, experience or maturity in the sport. If you factor those in, theoretically, D license holders would be the least likely to die per capita. The wind, ground, rig, etc. have no idea if it is your first jump or 10,000th. They don't care. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

The Sensitive Man A woman meets a man in a bar. They talk; they connect; they end up leaving together. They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment She notices that one wall of his bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet, cuddly teddy bears. There are three shelves in the bedroom, with hundreds and hundreds of cute, cuddly teddy bears carefully placed in rows, covering the entire wall! It was obvious that he had taken quite some time to lovingly arrange them and she was immediately touched by the amount of thought he had put into organizing the display. There were small bears all along the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears covering the length of the middle shelf, and huge, enormous bears running all the way along the top shelf. She found it strange for an obviously masculine guy to have such a large collection of Teddy Bears, She is quite impressed by his sensitive side. but doesn't mention this to him. They share a bottle of wine and continue talking and, after awhile, she finds herself thinking, 'Oh my God! Maybe, this guy could be the one! Maybe he could be the future father of my children?' She turns to him and kisses him lightly on the lips He responds warmly. They continue to kiss, the passion builds, and he romantically lifts her in his arms and carries her into his bedroom where they rip off each other's clothes and make hot, steamy love. She is so overwhelmed that she responds with more passion, more creativity, more heat than she has ever known. After an intense, explosive night of raw passion with this sensitive guy, they are lying there together in the afterglow. The woman rolls over, gently strokes his chest and asks coyly, 'Well, how was it?' The guy gently smiles at her, strokes her cheek, looks deeply into her eyes, and says: 'Help yourself to any prize from the middle shelf!' I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

I was never taught in school how historians differenciate between revolutions and civil wars. It is the outcome. The American Revolution is so named because the incumbent government was overthrown. The American Civil War is so named because the incumbent government remained. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Fox has been making a big deal of this. Not sure why. I've been the police officer who found the gun in the infant's blanket. If I was going to sneak something through security, a child is exactly the kind of mule I would want. I go through the security procedures in uniform with government orders and ID in my hand. Why is a six year old exempt? I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Actually, I see the Southern action as extremely similar to what the 13 colonies did; just with different results. I've never understood why one body of people can not choose to separate themselves from another (when, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary). I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Mrs. Smith comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner. He lives with a female roommate, Maria. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Anthony's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, 'I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are just roommates.' About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, 'Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose she took it, do you?' Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure.' So he sat down and wrote an email: Dear Mama, I'm not saying that you 'did' take the sugar bowl from my house; I'm not saying that you 'did not' take it. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner. Love, Anthony Several days later, Anthony received a response email from his Mama which read: Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Maria, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the sugar bowl by now. Love, Mama I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Two Tennessee rednecks are out hunting, and as they are walking along they come upon a huge hole in the ground. They approach it and are amazed by the size of it. The first hunter says, "Wow, that's some hole; I can't even see the bottom. I wonder how deep it is." The second hunter says," I don't know, let's throw something down and listen and see how long it takes to hit bottom." The first hunter says, "There's this old automobile transmission here, give me a hand and we'll throw it in and see". So they pick it up and carry it over, and count one, and two and three, and throw it in the hole. They are standing there listening and looking over the edge and they hear a rustling in the brush behind them. As they turn around they see a goat come crashing through the brush, run up to the hole and with no hesitation, jump in head first. While they are standing there looking at each other, looking in the hole and trying to figure out what that was all about, an old farmer walks up. "Say there," says the farmer, "you fellers didn't happen to see my goat around here anywhere, did you?" The first hunter says, " Funny you should ask, but we were just standing here a minute ago and a goat came running out of the bushes doin' about a hunert miles an hour and jumped headfirst into this hole here!" The old farmer said, "That's impossible, I had him chained to a transmission!" I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

A man was riding a bus, minding his own business, when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breastfeed her baby. The baby wouldn't take it, so she said: "Come on, eat it all up or ... I'll have to give it to this nice man here." Five minutes later, the baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come on, honey. Take it or I'll give it to this nice man here." A few minutes later, the anxious man blurted out: "Come on, kid. Make up your mind! I was supposed to get off four stops ago!" I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Our teacher asked us what our favorite animal was, & I said, "Fried chicken". She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else in the class laughed. My parents told me to always be truthful & honest, & I am. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, & he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA. He said they love animals very much. I do, too. Especially chicken, pork & beef. Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal's office. I told him what happened, & he laughed, too. Then he told me not to do it again. The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite live animal was. I told her it was chicken. She asked me why, just like she'd asked the other children. So I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken. She sent me back to the principal's office again. He laughed, & told me not to do it again. I don't understand. My parents taught me to be honest, but my teacher doesn't like it when I am. Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admire most. I told her, "Colonel Sanders". Guess where I am now??? I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

For Shah: Understanding Engineers #1 Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one said,"'Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway." Understanding Engineers #2 To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. Understanding Engineers #3 A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" The priest said, "Here comes the green-keeper. Let's have a word with him." He said, "Hello, George. What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The green-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything she can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?" Understanding Engineers #4 What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets. Understanding Engineers #5 The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?" Understanding Engineers #6 Three engineering students were gathered together discussing who must have designed the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?" Understanding Engineers #7 Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet. Understanding Engineers #8 An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful princess and stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want." Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool." I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

As I noted above, I phrased my original question inartfully. Please see my post #49, where I've re-phrased it for clarity. I noticed you rephrased it. I recognized from the beginning that you didn't mean what the question seemed to ask if taken literally. But your intended meaning suggests we fought the civil war over things such as the color of men's skins and attitudes towards them. My answer addressed that. Nuclear waste, poop, ignorance...try to not to get any on you. I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

You can't be trusted to raise your children...you need the government to teach them about sex, religion and to feed them properly. It is, afterall, a brave new world... I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.