slim

The inventor of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, “Since you’ve been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven.” Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, “I want to hang out with God.” St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God. Arthur then asked God, “Hey, aren’t you the inventor of woman?” God said, “Ah, yes.” “Well,” said Arthur, “professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention: 1. There’s too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion. 2. It chatters constantly at high speeds. 3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much. 4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust. 5. And the maintenance costs are outrageous.” “Hmmmm, you may have some good points there,” replied God, “hold on.” God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it. “Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed,” God said to Arthur, “but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours.” A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

as if skydiving could get any better!!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

Preach on Brother Rhino!!!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

How do you lose four sets of boobies?!?!?!?! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

Any disaster that makes me unable to jump, scares me!!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

only if you ask nice or pay well!! $$$= A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

about 80 degrees today!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

> from all of us inside my head! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

smokes here are about $4.85 and I am a pack a day smoker. A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

Ya know, I like your answer, wanna hook up? A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

may 25th of last year...first jump A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

Welcome, kiss the $$$ goodby, and say hello to the blue skies! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

don't let the name confuse you...it's far from free!!!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

not on your first few jumps!!!!

HOLY SHIT ZEEMAX IS GONNA FLY!!!!!!!! right on brother A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

Bad Ass man!!!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

kinda makes us hippocrits, trying to stay healthy so you can jump outta planes, don'cha think? fuck it drink, smoke, Jump!!!!! mind the order tho! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

I saw a sign in a resturaunt once it said "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire, and take appropriate measures" A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

been rather solomn recently huh? like prozak dropped a bomb here! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and God was tired of hearing the bickering. Finally God said, "Cool it! I am going to set up a test that will run two hours, and I will judge who does the better job." So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away. They moused. They did spreadsheets. They wrote reports. They sent faxes. They sent emails. They sent out emails with attachments. They downloaded. They did genealogy reports. They made cards. They did every known job. But 10 minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder clapped, the rain poured, and, of course, the electricity went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. Jesus just sighed. The electricity finally flickered back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically and screamed, "It's gone! It's all gone! I lost everything when the power went off!" Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of diligent work. Satan observed this and became irate. "Wait! He cheated! How did he do it?" God shrugged and said, "Jesus saves." A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

welcome back! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

you all rock, I have been smoking a pack a day for 10 years, and I can't miss 1 smoke or I go crazy!!! more power to you all!!!!!! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

we're behind you! not cuz we support you, it's because we don't want you to see us smoking!!!!! Best of luck to you man!!!!~ A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'

ya bring out the best in me! A good friend will bail you outta jail... A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "That was fucking awesome!!!'