Deuce

Take Iwan up on his generous offer.

Also, I'm available for photos and video of balloon jumps for slot plus pack job. And it guarantees that you'll be in the DVD! For folks who are on the fence about this adventure, I suggest you get off. It is great fun with about the most experienced balloon and chase crew in the world. And there's really no bad landing spots anywhere in that desert!

get it right you brit.... its sex in a canoe... She's from a civilized nation where they have boats. There's actually a decent amber beer that they have learned to stock in great quantities.

Well, we are going to arrive too late to jump, aren't we?! Getting drunk at altitude in a dry atmosphere...ouch. Still, it is Christmas! On this note, I'd like to pass on a lesson hard-learned. Eloy is a very dry atmosphere at altitude as well. Especially for folks from more humid climates, the need to force water is very real. We have the opportunity to jump for 12 hours as much as we like, and then "CLANG!" they open up the bottomless kegs and it's party time. By the third or fourth day you can be dry-heaves dehydrated. Because it's cool or cold during the day and you aren't sweating a person doesn't think to make sure to drink a gallon of water a day. The gallon of beer is guaranteed, but you'll have a better time if you remember to drink lots of water every day before the beer light comes on. Also, that first jump is at a very different density altitude than most folks are used to! Skydive AZ is at 1500 feet! So, that first canopy ride feels like it's on a canopy a size or two smaller than it feels at sea level.

Game on, you rose-secented-ass yank... Having a rose-scented ass is a bad thing in Canada, then?

How cool! It'll be fun to see you guys again!

Sorta.

I'm in! Just as long as I am not mistaken for ...game OK, that would be the one time I'd want to be Jim from Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. "Sangiro is in the helicopter directing Deuce toward the wild and unpredictable Southwestern Pixie"...

You Canadians and your total lack of the knowledge of warfare. Think "escalation of force" Remtard. You farting is like going to hydrogen bombs over using the wrong fork. You pull that on me in Eloy after a sausage Mcmuffin with egg, and you got yourself some serious Mutually Assured Destruction.

Dude, you need to come out and get on the wheel one of these days. We've got the new Aerodyne A2 tandem canopies, and they are pretty swooperiffic. Or just come out. Haven't seen you in too long.

The ATM card was the best deal for me when I was in England this past summer. Even better was the rate I got on my Amex card. The Visa debit card should do the trick for her, no ATM fees, and her money gets to stay where it is.

From Reno, Davis, Lodi, and Byron are all pretty much "on the way" Davis is right off of highway 80, Lodi is on 99 and Byron is off of 4 or 680 (580?). Byron is closed Christmas to New Year's but if it's not raining or blowing over 28mph, we're jumping at Byron Wednesday through Sunda. All of the mentioned DZ'z are usually Cessna (182's at Davis and Lodi, a 206 at Byron) during the week, with turbines on the weekend. Lodi has an Otter and a Beech 18, Davis has the new PAC 750, and we have a KingAir at Byron. If you choose to drop by Byron, please say Hi! JP

Yes. Much more birdman footage as well.

I'm sure Mike McGowan will be available for the record, so I'll be free to get inside video of you rocketing past humping the beachball while I dock on Karen and we point and laugh! Viola! (That's pronounced "VIE-OH-LAH!" by the way)

That shot is cool.

You are so pathetic. Don't think that laying the groundwork with this nonsense about being exposed to some weak Canadian virus is going to get you off the hook from skydiving. "Oh, I'd love to set a new DZ.com record, but I'm all sniffly" Suck it up and have a screwdriver.

You so funny. I need more footage from this Greg guy of you doing the freestyle thing. It's Holiday Boogie Video Time!

Betsy Barnhouse? I love you too. XO JP

Ah, Bets. That I survived the last year or so without getting on a high building with a rifle is actually a miracle. My friends have sustained me. It's important to focus on the positive things when the dark things seem omnipotent. Hear me Lisa?

Sorry to hear it. Can't drink yet, got basketball practice in 45minutes and the 3rd grade girl's team gets a little freaked out when I fall on my face doing layup practice. I'll have a nice gin and tonic with you about 9 your time.

Yeah, I guess. A good friend would check you in to the Betty Ford clinic. A REALLY good friend would be forced into detox with you by court order. Which reminds me. Where's my crack pipe?

I won a small safe once. At a casino night thing about 20 years ago. The safe is in my garage. I have no idea what the combination is anymore and don't know what's in it. I think I need to drill that safe and "win" whatever I thought was important enough to put in a safe 20 years ago. You're better off without the millions, Shannon. The first time you checked into the Betty Ford Clinic a couple years down the road from winning you would remember us and miss us. "Oh, those skydiver people I used to know. They were fun".

Dude, you are working for a retirement. Your retirement beats the holy shit out of every body elses. Like mine does. Clay, I love you and respect the work you do. But quit whining. You can go sit in a patol car and do that, or go sit in an unarmored humvee for five times the money in Iraq. You sit in first class and wait to kill America's enemies. You may wait forever. That would be victory. Doing nothing for the rest of your professional life would be victory. That's a tough definition of professional success. If you want to be busy, with daily successes, get a job in law enforcement in Atlanta or Tampa. You are badass, Clay. You won't get that reassurance in LE unless you get in the trenches.

Comfortable for the spoonee, however as the spooner, my arm always falls asleep! Of course it's payback when I fall asleep, then roll ove thus snatching the "pillow" out from under the spoonee. OK Oral sex rule; After good faith spoonage, oral sex is obligatory. Upon movage of spoonee awakening spooner, where both parties come fully awake, spoonee is obliged to obligate spooner with oral sex, if obliged. All of life is about oral sex.