RhondaLea

I read this quickly, and I was ready to kick your ass. Then I saw the "not buy" part, and I have to agree. So the only part I don't agree with is the "half-seriously." In the end, love is what you do, not what you say. A woman will cut a guy a lot of slack if she believes he really gives a shit about her feelings. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I say we kill all non-clever trolls. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

This is the heart of the problem. It's not just a BASE issue, it's a "golf and football and stamp-collecting and workaholism and just about anything else a man uses to tell a woman that she is irrelevant" issue. If you ignore and disregard a woman long enough, she'll get the message and go away. Everyone has an ego, and everyone wants to feel important to someone. If the message you're sending to another person is "everything is more important than you; you're last on the list," then you should expect to come home one night and find the house empty. You would think it would be different if a man and a woman share an activity, but it's not. A lot of relationships end in spite of that, because even with the togetherness of the activity, the attitude remains. It's not about giving up or even curtailing an activity you love and need to feel whole, it's about making sure that the person you love doesn't feel neglected, abandoned and otherwise like a piece of the furniture. My answer to your poll, David, is closest to the first option, but with a little less attitude. Call her, and let her know you're going to be a bit late, go make the jump, then go to the party. If that's not acceptable, maybe you have a problem. Or maybe you should have prioritized your time better so that on the other non-occasions when you weren't jumping, you should've been jumping so that you wouldn't mind giving up jumping one night to attend the party. Edited to add: I don't know Chad and Katie, but my impression is that they treat each other as best friends first. If more men would treat their partner as they would treat their best friend, these kinds of questions probably would not arise, but in the end, men seem to look at women as "they who hold the key to sex," and far too much of what men do revolves around manipulating women to get some. If men were able to treat a woman as they would a friend, it wouldn't be an issue--unless, of course, they treat their friends carelessly and callously too. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

1. At most larger dropzones, fatality or not, jumping continues. At the smaller ones, because everyone knows the person who went in, it's less likely. 2. Law enforcement gave up the search at nightfall for a reason. That reason is probably two-fold: a) safety and b) it's hard to find much in the dark. 300+ skydivers traipsing around in the woods in the dark is probably not a good idea. 3. The people who were at the party were not likely to have known the the tandem passenger. You're asking them to do to things: a) conduct a search that professionals have called off, and b) to show excessive grief for a stranger. Do you stop your life every time anyone dies? If so, when do you have time for a life? In the absence of any practical thing these people could have done, what were they supposed to do? Cancel the party, go home and be sad about a stranger? If you go home after a Saturday of jumping and read the dz.com fatality reports from all over the country, do you then fail to jump on Sunday "out of respect" for fallen skydivers whom you've never met? Finally, if this person had been a regular at the dropzone, what do you think anyone would have done differently? Isn't it most likely that the party would have gone on, but in a slightly more subdued form, as a kind of wake? I don't know about ASC, but in most of the places I've been, everyone gathers together afterward to offer each other support. Life is for the living. Skydiving, as I know it, is a triumph of life over death. Cancelling the party would have honored that not at all. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Summed up perfectly. Unfortunate but true, and now it's happening in BASE. Oh no! Not the old argument about who is a skydiver and who is not (or who is a BASE jumper and who is not)! Semantics wasn't the point, Keely, although it seems it's what everyone wants to latch onto. There was a time when skydiving was a lifestyle. It isn't anymore. I remember a few years ago some guy made a post on r.s about going to the dz, making a few jumps and going home. He wasn't part of the life on the dz at all, and most of what he did were either coach jumps or solos. That's fine if that's what someone wants, but as I said, the face of skydiving has changed. I remember one dz I jumped at for a time where everyone showed up for the weekend, jumped, sat around together Saturday night, went to sleep together in the hangar and the manifest, got up together Sunday, and jumped some more. On Sunday night, everyone went together to a local restaurant for dinner. Small, close-knit dz, and surprisingly little in the way of politics. Given that there seem to be more factions on larger dzs where there's far less group activity to bind everyone together, maybe I'll just blame it on turbine aircraft. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

That works if it's an activity, not if it's a lifestyle. Unless your 'lifestyle' involves income, I'm not seeing the distinction. You take as much crap in a leisure activity as you choose to. I don't know who's screwing who and I just don't care. I'm there to jump, right? It's a community. It's the difference between being involved in your neighborhood watch and just living in a house in a neighborhood. The face of skydiving has changed. There are now people who go to the dz, jump, and leave. They are not part of the life that is the dropzone. If that's what you choose, it's fine, but in that case, you're not a skydiver, you are merely someone who skydives. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Works great for me. All smiles. That works if it's an activity, not if it's a lifestyle. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

No drama there. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

None. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

That's what men always say. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

No. Get used to it. It won't change. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Gets my vote. All I want is a world in which I don't have to deal with proselytizing or an attempt to force me into one or another person's idea of how I ought to live. Short of that, anyone can believe whatever they want. But anyone who preaches to me or tries to control me can expect a punch in the nose. Edited to add: In my eyes, this thread is no different from the other one. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

And to bring out all peeps that have nothing other than to complain bout shit that dont matter. Whaaa Whaaa Whaaaaaaaaaaa. And to bring out the rest of the peeps that have nothing other than to complain about other posters expressing opinions that disagree with theirs. Boo hoo. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I don't know what everyone else says, but it seems to me that all along you could've given someone the money and had them buy beer on your behalf. Or you could've bought soda. My daughter has done exactly one tandem. It occurred on her 18th birthday. On the way to the dz, I bought the beer to commemorate the event. No matter what, you buy your beer. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I give up. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Bet you can't outdo NASA: Kitty on the Vomit Comet If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

You keep saying this, as if people who are morbidly obese want to be fat. Think about it. The first time I gained weight inexplicably, I went from 125 pounds to 205 pounds in three months. I am 5'7" and I was young, so it wasn't as horrible as it could've been, but it was devastating to me. I lost 30 pounds less than six months later, but that left me at 175, and I stayed at that weight for several years, when the loss of an additional 35 pounds occurred inexplicably. Fortunately, the most I've ever weighed since then is 175 (only once and not for long, because I was undermedicated), but the extra weight sucks, and I hate it. As I said, right now I need to lose ten, and I'd be happier with 15, and I have no choice but to exercise because the last bout seems to have done bad things to my muscle tone. But if I can gain 80 pounds in a three month period without changing my activity or diet, how can you say that there's no excuse for someone who is 70 pounds overweight? rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Started: 36 Last jump: 43 Now: 47 If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Every time this subject comes up anywhere, no matter what brand of Christian thought is being discussed, this question gets asked. That's the problem, Sarah. Every Christian says that their kind of Christianity is the "Real Christianity." How are pagans supposed to know who has God's seal of approval? rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Beer Rules

Will Bartlett's Beacon survive a free-fall-assist from 320' with a 46" p/c?

I have suffered from clinical depression several times in the past years as a direct result of my thyroid problem. Someone who is clinically depressed is not in control of much of anything, eating included. Some people eat to deal with depression, others (like me), simply give up food, and live on coffee (in my case, tea) and cigarettes. Look, when I see a grossly obese person driving one of those motorized carts around WalMart picking up every possible item trans fat-containing item on the shelves, I do wonder what that person is thinking. And I can't quite imagine how uncomfortable it must be to have all that fat on ones body and not be able to get away from it. I once knew an extremely short, fat female attorney. She wasn't some kind of sloth. She was extremely good at what she did, and her appearance was always impeccable. She just could not lose the weight, and by the time I knew her, she'd given up. She had learned to live with her body as it was, and she just put her energy (quite a lot, and certainly more than I have) into other things. Obesity is not a one-size-fits-all diagnosis, and we don't really know all the reasons that people get fat and stay fat. For some people it may be a choice, but for others, it's a disability just like any other disability. Besides, having an "excuse" for being fat doesn't make someone any less fat, y'know. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

200 ug Synthroid and 2.5 ug Cytomel. Daily. It's working now, but I had a number of PCOS symptoms in my early years (twice-yearly, two-week long periods; extreme sensitivity to sugar; extemely muscular legs; among other things), and I think that throws things off too. I'm 47, but menopause comes very late in my family. Also, I was diagnosed hypo at 14, treated for a year, and then went untreated until I was 37. I was then diagnosed with Hashimoto's thyroiditis. (I was symptomatic for 10 years, and ultimately diagnosed with MS because no one was smart enough to do a blood test, although they did a shitload of MRIs. I don't have MS, btw.) My thyroid should be dead by now, but in the last ten years it has been a slow progression starting from 125 ug T4 and increasing to the current dose of 200 ug, which has been nearly adequate for the last year. I see the endo every 3 months. Sorry to hijack, so let's get back to the fat discussion. But I would like to put a plug in here for early and often thyroid testing. Between 6 and 8 million people are walking around undiagnosed in the US alone, and because thyroid affects every single organ of the body, it's important to have it checked regularly. An untreated thyroid condition can mimic a lot of other diseases, and in most cases, it's easily treatable. And it is much easier to lose weight when ones thyroid is right, although it does take some discipline--the weight does not just fall off because you take a pill. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Depression is yet another excuse because they could choose to do something about that, but they don't. You might want to read up a bit on depression. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I forgot to mention the hypothyroid-induced hypoglycemia. If I were to eat like this, I would be near-psychotic, and I would gain weight from the excess of carbs. My body shouldn't be this way, and it drives me crazy that I'm not "normal," but at 47, I don't have much hope that it's going to change. BTW, if I don't get adequate amounts of fat in my diet, I get sick. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb