Thanatos340

Ahhhhh!! Dang it!! You were next on my list too. But I do tend to get a little Stalky sometimes.

Just make sure its not GFD!! I already tried that and it really hasnt been that much fun.

Not Funny.. Its Scary!! I Think that Skimel is the Prototype.. They could be building 1000`s of them over there. I think their plan is to send one to every DZ in the country and then buy it out when the Value Drops. What would happen to the value of you DZ if suddenly 4 or 5 Shimmells showed up?? Imagine how quick you DZO would want to get away!! They have already infected my DZ.. Yours could be next!! This is serious Stuff!! (Why do you think he was screaming "My Electronics!! My Electronics!!" when they tried to throw him in the Pond?? He is really a Robot programmed to annoy everyone!!)

It means that Skimmel is no more than a 20 minute drive from where ever you are. It Means that there will be soon be a 1-800-Skimell service that will sell a Skimell Vouchers that no one wants to admit they accept and you will have to drive across 4 states to use it only to find out you paid 4 times as much as the others. It means that if you accidentally call shimmels number by mistake while actually trying to call someone else, they will pretend to be whoever you thought you were calling and sell you a Skimel Voucher that no one wants to admit they accept. It means that skimmell will soon have tattoos stolen off other skydivers bodies. It means that Skimmel will be invading a DZ near you soon!!

There are different opinions on this. Some people Feel that ASC and Skyride are one and the same as the are Owned and Run by the same person/s. ASC used all the same tactics (Fraudulent Websites, Lying about their Location, Claiming to be a Competing DZ when someone calls them by mistake, Hidden Fees and generally unethical and possibly illegal behavior) that Skyride is now using for years before starting Skyride. Others believe that they are two separate Business and we should only focus on Skyride. The discussion in this thread is about what we should do about these problems in our sport. Boycotting ASC and anyone who does business with them is definitely one option as ASC is the Mothership for this operation and where it all started. To Kill a Snake, You have to cut off its head. Others know many jumpers at that ASC and do not want to speak out against that DZ for various reasons. Some even feel that there is nothing wrong with ASC/Skyrides business practices.

OK... Skimmel.. While making fun of you is definitely a favorite past time for many, I do occasionally feel Sorry for you.. Soo. Here is a Little tip.. When a Girl takes something you say the wrong way (which happens to all of us every once in a while)... The Proper Response is NOT Work on that Buddy. One day you may overcome your uhhh Handicap. (Oh and BTW.. it is "You Are" not "Your")

Usually the Cock Blocker is Friend of that Hottie that you hitting on that decides they are going to do whatever they can to interfere with you actually getting somewhere with said Hottie. Marks would pride himself on this skill around the DZ. Anytime he saw some guy possibly getting somewhere with some Hottie. He would run over and start Cock Blocking. He became so good at this that he would eventually figure out some way to even Cock Block Himself.

You are 100% correct Brains..... You have obviously never met Shimell!!

We face a Much more Serious Problem. It is being discussed Here. Please give this matter your prompt attention.

WOW!! I Did. And Drunk Dials the list obviously needs work.

In the spirit of David Allen Coe`s "Perfect Country Western Song". I had just made a post in General Skydiving that I though may have been my best ever.. But then I got to thinking.. What would it take to be the "The Perfect DZ.com Post". It would have to mention: Boobies!! Clay & Sheep Shimell`s Spelling Sex RSL or No RSL Sex (again) Boobies (again) Wingloading Requirements The repost police Jello-Shots Cowbell And Boobies Anything else that should be included?? Anyone want to take a shot at Writing the Perfect DZ.com Post??

[Conspiracy Theory] Its is about time someone brought this up. This has concerned me for sometime. At first this problem was pretty much confined to a single DZ (ASC), Now ASC has ramped up their Evil plan to destroy Skydiving everywhere by Unleashing this Menace on the world. You see the real threat is that Shimmel is just the first on many that the evil Ben & Cary are Planning on unleashing on the rest of the DZ`s in the world. ASC has stated many times before that Shimmel was their First ever AFF Graduate they had and their First Ever Homegrown AFF Instructor. They Made HIM!! They Built HIM!! Now they have unleashed Him... How many more just like him do they have waiting to infect other DZ`s?? This is of particular concern to me as it seems that shimmel has taken up roots at my Favorite DZ Skydive (the Anti-ASC) the Farm. Since he showed up there, I have personally noticed an accelerated rate of hair loss that now has me considering shaving my head, Women no longer return my Calls, I have completely forgotten how to spell, I have an urge to SPLASH down into the pond on every landing and then ask everyone who saw my Cool Swoop and I have a sudden urge to scream "My Electronics!! My Electronics!!" every time I feel slightly threatened. The disease is spreading!! This is Serious Business!! Dont let your DZ get invaded by a Shimmel!! Warning to everyone... Your DZ could be next!! Stop this Menace before it is too late. ASC/Skyride has truly stooped to a new LOW on this one!! I may someday forget about the Million of Fake websites, The Bait and switch, The Hidden Fees, The Stolen Pictures and everything else… But Unleashing the Shimmel on the rest of the world.. Well that was just plain Dirty!! [/Conspiracy Theory]

Hey, We could always Pimp out a Couple of Crack Whores... Where My Money Biatch!!

I think a properly administered High Volume of high alcohol content Jello and a weekend in the slightly higher elevations of Georgia coupled with heavy Doses of COWBELL should do the trick.

Here comes the Bride!! Bum Bum ba dum!! Seriously.. Tommorow Wendy by Concrete Blonde

Wow.. That last picture looks just like my rig does everytime after I let JumpChikk use it!!

Hel Kel... You know they are planning another shoot this weekend at that DZ.. It is less than a 45 minute drive for you . Maybe you just need Picture Practice!!

I hate having my picture taken. I am definitely in the same boat as you. I am NOT photogenic at all (either that or I am just not quite as devastatingly handsome as I think I am cause pictures of me always look like shit ) so I avoid cameras whenever possible. In my 36 years on this rock, I have seen less than 5 pictures of me that I actually liked.

This thread reminds me of one of my favorite movie quotes: "Women!!! They got half the Money and all the Pussy!!" and they think that entitles them to the other half of the money as well. [bonus points] Name the movie?? [/bonus points]

How is it that slightly more than half of the worlds Population has an Unlimited supply of something, Yet they manage it in such a way that it is the most sought after commodity by the other half. Men will do just about anything for it. Spend Ridiculous amounts of money to get it, Jump through just about any hoop, and say and do the most stupid things. All just so they can a little bit. Absolutely Brilliant!! Maybe I should have a Woman run my company.

OK.. At the Farm there is Storage Tub over by the Video Editing Cabinet.. In That Tub is 2 sets of Head Gear, 2 Sets set of 18oz Boxing Gloves and several New (Never been Used) Mouth Pieces. 2 Minute Rounds for you ladies. I will ref and Judge. 3 Rounds. Winner gets 2 Jumps on me. Skimmell vs Weatherman Pruit. You Up for it?

I have been Jumping a Pilot 188 for a several months. Yes it opens slow (I Like that!!), Never had an Off heading opening (Unless it was Psycho packed and then it was 180 off - I don’t think the Packer flipped the bag) but I have had to fly the harness a little at times during the opening. Just a little moderate input to keep it straight if one side starts to inflate before the other. I recently put a few Jumps on a Demo 168 and it was exactly the same. Don’t roll the nose, It opens fine if you just hide it a little. Mine is a smooth opening canopy and the Demo 168 was exactly the same.

I have been trying to get you and your better half (in this case actually MUCH better half) out there for a while. She promised me you guys would be there 2 weeks ago. See what you missed?? More women than men at this DZ. Poor Ben and I need some help out there. They gang up on us alot and keep trying to get us drunk and take advantage of us. Damn near impossible to take a shower by yourself there, They keep busting in and demanding that you wash their backs. get your asses out there. You will not be dissapointed.

It is not marketing when they Claim to be someone/someplace they are not. It is called FRAUD. It is not Marketing when they claim to be located in one state and in reality they are in another state. It is Deception. It is not Marketing when they use STOLEN property to "Market" their product. I completely agree with you that ASC has Great Aircraft, Top Notch Instructors and Good Facilities. I personally dont care that ASC/Skyride doesn’t mention other DZs that do not participate in their program (What business points out their Competitors??).. The problem with them is that they intentionally Lie, mislead and deceive their customers about who they are and where they are. They use STOLEN intellectual Property to market themselves and then charge all sorts of ridiculous Hidden Fees once they have the deposit (And of course the deposit is non-refundable). How would you like it if I sold you something and AFTER I got your Non-refundable Deposit, I told you oh BTW.. You have to drive 4 hours further than you thought to pick it up.. and then when you get there you find out there is an Extra Fee for "The Big Plane", an extra Fee for "All the way up" an extra Fee for "Gear Rental" and whatever else. Oh and if you complain.. No Refund on your deposit. Would you put up with that? Unfortunately, that is exactly what happens to many Skyride Customers. And you think this helps this sport??

Ninja, I party agree with you.. Their “Aggressive Advertising” may actually bring more people in, But I am sure they Turn Off a MUCH greater number when those people realize they have been mislead and overcharged. The end result is a net loss to the sport. But to take your analogy one step further.. Six Flags don’t use Pictures of Mickey in their Ads. Also Six Flags is pretty honest about where they are located (Six Flags over Georgia is actually in Georgia). Now maybe Six Flags can follow the ASC/Skyride marketing approach and create web sites for Six Flags over North Dakota, over Florida, over Alaska and every other state in the country. Use pictures from Disney, MGM and Universal and then only AFTER they sell them their NON_REFUNDABLE ticket, tell the customer that they need to drive to Georgia or Texas to use their Ticket. The bottom line is that they are Dishonest. They Lie, Cheat and Steal as documented over and over again in this thread.