vonSanta
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Everything posted by vonSanta
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I SO did not need to hear the answer. Why did I ask? What am I, a masochist? Don't answer that. We have a comparatively short jump season here and we only got Cessna DZs, with the occasional Caravan/Beaver/Nomad/Otter (rarely) at boogies or competitions. Getting 200 fun jumps a uear means being at the DZ every weekend and pushing to be on the first and last lift. Can't begin to express my envy of people who can have turbines and skydive pretty much when they want. I need to move. But being an IT dude, to get a job I'd have to move to India and work for $2 a month. And the monsoon(sp) season there would sorta suck, too. 4000 jumps. Man. That's a LOT of time spent in and out of planes and around fellow jumpers. And you never have grown tired of it? Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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You mean you guys actually work? Why? Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Yes yes yes. I have my lists, being Santa and all that. However, being a rather unscrupolous individual (not to mention a Fat Old Bastard) I can very much be affected by sucking up and arse kicking. As I tell my helpers "Lick up and kick down, that's the way up the corporate ladder lickety split" You all KNOW you've been naughty. And I know it too. In fact I got most of it on video tape (coming to an X-rated cinema near ya). So lemme hear it. What are you willing to do to make up for all that naughtyness and ensure you get the cool new Santa "it's so elliptical it's practically just a line in the air" 54 sqft canopy? Am waiting. But not forever.... Remember: it's not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for Santa. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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They can track him down all they want - all he needs to claim is that he was resting and put his hand up like that coz the helmet is sorta heavy. "Didn't even know there was a camera guy there". That photo is great Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Mmm? Youh wherwe shaynn? Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Why did you start skydiving/ BASE jumping?
vonSanta replied to lkolkin's topic in General Skydiving Discussions
I have this odd thing that pops up now and then. A question. I wonder what it'd be like to [insert thing here]. It's gotten me hurt before, like when I wondered what'd happen if I sat on the hood of the old car and my friend drove it straight into a stack of hay as fast as the old wreck would go. So I wondered what diving wrecks would be like - and I do that. Same with climbing really big (to me) rocks. Then a pal started skydiving and my sister said "I wonder what it feels like". It may scare me shiteless (skydiving certainly did, as did deep dives with no visibility and climbing rock wall over your ability) but there is something that forces me to sort of at least try it out once. My sister is the same except she's more of a crazy type. I made the mistake of asking her (since I wondered what it'd be like) how it felt to track really hard and get lots of speed. I got a long answer and wanted to do it. So, here I am -
F*ing SA bastards are stealing all the blue skies. It's been more than three weeks for me . You jump pretty much all year around, yeah? Any seasonal differences with regards to jump frequency? I bet the Americans are doing their part of Blue Sky stealing too. Grrr. When I become dictator... Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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The joys of the internet: Mat 7:1 Judge not, that ye be not judged. Mat 7:2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. Mat 7:3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? This is actually a pretty cool passage, although it has its flaws. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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"To diminate". You're "diminating" the opposition when you're not only dominating them - you're making them look like retarded three year olds with bowel problems. Not only are you dominating them - you're diminishing their very value as human beings- hence the word
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Help me find a job and I'm there. Hm, I'd probably need a gun, too. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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So, when are you gonna get your thumb outta yer fart-canal and actually jump? Geesh man, only 4k jumps? Seriously, congrats dude. Awesome. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Yeash, it is my GOD GIVEN RIGHT to carry nuclear hand grenades. If you outlaw them, only outlaws will have them! And we KNOW that outlaws don't care about the law, so it won't work on them anyway. Oooh a Splat-O-Matic Gargutian Meglatroplic DisMangleTroid Chemical Joy Joy gun! I want! And no way the US government can forbid me, coz the constitution said nuthin' about me not being allowed to have one. Michale Moore is entertaining and at times funny. I haven't considered any of his shows/film documentaries - they're "poking fun/embarrasing" at various groups, that's all. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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C'mon, Steve the Croc Hunter is pretty cool! . I thoought of him as an exaggerated git until he said "oh lookie there. Crikey that's a big croc in the water. That one can TEAR UP A HUMAN with a single bite. I am gonna pay 'im a vist" "Ooooh, he's a bit cranky, ain't he?" That sold me right there on the spot Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Bit late reply to this one...but OH MY FRICKIN GOD!!!! If you think this is kickass then take a step back and a look around, a BIG step back and a BIG look around! It's Bad Religion. Look up the lyrics in its entirety and it becomes very obvious they're being sarcastic. As they usually are
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You know your a real skydiver when.......(continued)
vonSanta replied to SkyAnt's topic in The Bonfire
4) you're a skydiver if you spend $250 on a day's worth of jumping, yet become upset and scream if you have to pay $1 more than usual for a meal. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst -
Congratulations to Tonto! 4000th skydive!!!
vonSanta replied to SkyDivaChristie's topic in The Bonfire
Congrats Tonto! 4000 jumps...that's a lot of time spent in heaven -
Hm, skydivers around here tend to think of BASE jumping as a pretty neat thing - even if most wouldn't do it themselves. I'll get to do it when we run outta oil and thus can't fly anymore
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Hahahah, this list is quite amusing :). Bet these undeniable truths are pretty deniable now. I liked the last one the best: You should thank God for making you an American; and instead of feeling guilty about it, help spread our ideas worldwide. Oh yes, Kipling's The White Man's Burden all over. Askthe Brits how well their attempts to educate the barbarian masses went. And the Goid sentiment expressed here, well, bad Religion said it best in "American Jesus": I feel sorry For the earth’s population ’cuz so few Live in the u.s.a. At least the foreigners Can copy our morality They can visit but they cannot stay We’ve got the american jesus See him on the interstate We’ve got the american jesus He helped build the President’s estate Kickass
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Yeah. We're bloody lucky righties are too, or we'd go through life unbalanced Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Knew this would be entertaining. Even I know not to mess with "the small US neighbor Texas" or diss Texans. And I live in Denmark. Coincidentally, if it is freedom to drink you want, come to Denmark. We Drink All Night. As in "it's noon the next day, wanna go to an afterparty?" Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Kiss your whuffo friends goodbye
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I'd translate that as "and migrate 121 named users of [program name] to 121 application users of [program name]". In other words, turn 121 named users of the program into 121 application users of the program. The grammar of that sentence (in Danish) is unclear and redundant. Written by computer geeks, no doubt . I think you've understood it correctly. Miranda: oooh that Danish thing you got going is sooooo hot! Not to mention pretty accurate. Soooo, hvor skal du studere? Aarhus og Aalborg har de bedste universitet . Lyt ikke til Faber; han har ikke en anelse hvad han snakker om. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst
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Yah Deuce, I sorta agre with you. On the other hand, if getting along with his ex during his kids childhood means not seeing his daughter and her ex trying to move him to the periphery and replace him with this new guy, I say fight it. Of course there needs to be lots of communication with the child about what is going on and why. She needs to be asked for her opinion. It's just that if she spednds the majority of time with the mother, she can easily poison/guide her mind/choices. Truly a bad situation, but I'd go for fighting it if the mother is unreasonable. It's not just her child. This is one area where women have the upper hand. Even if they're a worse parent than the father, they almost always get custody . Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst