DrunkMonkey
-
Content
2,369 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Never -
Feedback
0%
Everything posted by DrunkMonkey
-
When I was growing up, there were dozens of pigeons and squirrels in our yard. This was because of the redneck next door putting out all manner of stale breads and seed for a "feeder." The pigeons were shitting all over our deck, and the squirrels were eating our garden. My father gave me a pellet gun and a 500 pack of pellets. Told me that 22 pumps on it was the velocity of a .22LR 14 pigeons, 9 squirrels....
-
Go for movies that prove life is pretty good, because others' is much shittier: -Kids -Trainspotting -Gattaca
-
Anything from Nirvana or Nine Inch Nails...
-
Huh? Cassowaries have been known to kill people... WTF am I going to do with a 8' bird known to kill humans? Take it to the DZ and chase whuffos? Love it.
-
Huh? Cassowaries have been known to kill people...
-
Stupid political glurge that makes otherwise adult voters seem like 15-y.o. kids in a shouting match...
-
You should get a Cassowary . Name it Bob. Feed it raw meat and train it to beat up schoolchildren.
-
Yes, IIRC.
-
*WARNING-Slight Thread Jack* ...But ever notice ignorant NASCAR rednecks never advocate disbanding NASCAR when some hick gets into a fatal wreck, but if a skydiver hurts themselves, they're all about banning/restricting skydiving?
-
I guess my evening working on the restoration of my '77 Jeep wouldn't be so much fun for others to watch, other than the bruises and cuts I ended up with...
-
My guess is that "blow up on impact" refers to their tendancy to mushroom on impact with a hard object...
-
...The funniest game this week! Hangaroo!
-
So far I'm considering a .22 Rifle or a couple of anti-personnel landmines...
-
How do I get the cats in the neighborhood to quit shitting and pissing in my yard? Apparently my yard is the new Litter Box for all the Fucking cats in the neighborhood. So far I've tried moth balls, lemon scent and cayenne pepper and they still shit and piss. I called animal control and they said they'd give me a cat trap, but there is a 3 week waiting period. I guess I'm not the only one with this problem. Any suggestions?
-
Here you go! www.uglypeople.com/
-
A chinchilla . Discuss.
-
Anyone want to help defend the (relative) safety of our sport?
DrunkMonkey replied to lkolkin's topic in The Bonfire
...Which is why I am an oddity-a 27 year old man with a DNR on his medical record. I don't wanna live like Christopher Reeve... -
Q: How can you tell the French soldier at the beach? A: He's the one with the tan armpits...
-
Gyros are good.
-
Anyone want to help defend the (relative) safety of our sport?
DrunkMonkey replied to lkolkin's topic in The Bonfire
Nor is: -Sushi -Driving a car -Walking -Swimming -Boating -Red Meat -Raw vegetables -90% of the world's water -Sunlight -Darkness -Alcohol -Sugar -Pets -Oysters -Fish -Electricity -Pharmaceuticals -Gasoline But I will still indulge... -
For the fucking election to be over... Please make it a decisive win...At this point I don't give a fuck who wins...as long as the fucking bickering stops!!!
-
One is a college kid being just that, another is a grown woman apparently reaching her tolerance for nonsense. Both are not worth the brain bytes burned to think about them..
-
I'd like to walk up to GWB just after his successor is sworn in (be it this January or Jan '09) and say: "Good Morning, Mr President. I'm Capt DrunkMonkey. I cornholed your daughters. Whatcha gonna do about it?!?"
-
Audible Flatulence is ill-advised: -At a funeral -At a wedding -While having sex -whilst revcieving oral sex -When meeting your significant other's parents -While getting chewed out by your boss -in a small swimming pool ...
-
Make up your mind, you GUN BAN HOPLOPHOBES!
DrunkMonkey replied to peacefuljeffrey's topic in Speakers Corner
Emus are from Australia.