Taken from rec.skydiving:
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when in doubt, hook it out!
"He who hesitates shall inherit the earth." - Anon
"Some spot 'em as they see 'em and some spot 'em as they are,
but there's no spot until you leave the plan anyway and by then
its too late!" - Anon
On docking:
"The bigger they are - The harder they hit you." -- Anon
On competing:
"It doesn't matter if you win or lose - unless you lose."
"The sky's not the limit, the ground is, so shut up and jump."
"Air is like water, just less dense ... but at 120 mph you can grab it
and pull on it.." --Anon
"Brainlock is not a skydiving skill" -- Mark Hewitt
"I've gone to several drop zones that have signs saying 'No Low Pulls'.
Well, rules or not, if I get low I'm pulling." --Anon
"I have and Love Hate relationship with gravity." --Anon
"If God didn't want us to jump out of perfectly good airplanes, he
would have given us wings." --Anon
"If God didn't want us to fly, he would have given us roots." --Anon
"When people look like ants - pull,
when ants look like people - pray"
"Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast."
"When in doubt, whip it out."
"... 'course even in skydiving there are folks living on the edge"
"Pack fast, pull low, and date your riggers wife"
"Don't believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is
limitation, look with your understanding, find out what you
already know and you'll see the way to fly."
--from Jonathan Livingston Seagull
"There is a reason to life. We can lift ourselves out of ignorance,
we can find ourselves as creatures of excellence and intelligence
and skill. We can be free! We can learn to fly!"
--from Jonathan Livingston Seagull
"There was a limit to how much the new body could do, and though it was
much faster than his old level-flight record, it was still a limit. In
heaven, he thought, there should be no limits."
--from Jonathan Livingston Seagull
"And Jonathan rose with the two star-bright gulls to disappear into a
perfect dark sky."
--from Jonathan Livingston Seagull
"You will begin to touch heaven in the moment that you touch perfect
speed. And that isn't flying a thousand miles per hour, or a million,
or flying at the speed of light. Because any number is a limit, and
perfection doesn't have limits. Perfect speed is being there."
--from Jonathan Livingston Seagull
Rules of skydiving:
" Fall Fast
Always Buy your Beer
Refuse to die!"
"'Sometimes you're the bug... Sometimes you're the windshield.' best
describes my jumping career."
"The best AOD made is your right hand, the second best is your left"
"Rainy weekends at the DZ are the most expensive"
"CRW guys all have vans and park at the other end of the DZ"
"SKYDIVING: GRAVITY-POWERED ADVENTURE!"
"Skydivers have a remarkable ability to say 'Probably nothing will
happen to me.' I think it's part of why we're able to get into
potentially dangerous aircraft and do potentially dangerous things in
potentially dangerous situations only to be rescued by potentially
dangerous equipment." -- Charles Thomas
"If riding in an airplane is flying, then riding in a boat is swimming.
If you want to experience the element, get out of the vehicle."
-Anon.
"...And once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your
eyes turned skywards, for there you have been, and there you long to
return..." - Leonardo da Vinci
"Better to be on the ground, wishing you were in the air, than in the
air, wishing you were on the ground!"
"The probability of someone watching you is in direct relation to the
stupidity of your actions" --on the Raeford manifest
"There's two types of skydivers. Those who've landed off the DZ, and
those who are GOING to land off the DZ." - "Doc", C-180 pilot at
Paranaut Skydiving, Omro, WI after I landed in a frozen, plowed bean
field on my second static line jump.
--Charles Thomas
"The higher we soar, the smaller we seem to those who cannot fly."
"Living: It's the only thing worth dying for."
"Man uses only 11% of his brain. The fact that makes extreme sports
possible."
- Trinh BÄ Tung
When people look like ants - pull
When ants look like people - pray
What to do when ants look like ants ?
Flare. ;)
When people look like people - PARTY!!!
1. When in doubt, whip it out.
2. Going low is a rush, it's just not practical.
3. Take it on down, Turkey. Hell aint half full!
4. The biggest part of a skydiver's body is the ego.
5. Skydivers eat their dead.
6. Everyone is a one-way formation. To build something bigger, you
gotta do RW.
pat works
Afraid? Nah.
Terrified? Absolutely. Every single jump.
--Charles Thomas
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to do what needs
to be done in spite of one's fear." -- Anon
On exit, I am completely mindful. The usual chatter of "he said, she
said", the fretting over past actions, the worries over potential
problems
disappear. It is like the culmination of a lifetime of meditation.
Instant mindfulness, complete presence in the moment, total absorption
in
the here and now, full peace of mind.
Of course, that's not why I do it, really I'm just trying to impress
women
- but that's not working, so the above is a great bonus.
My boss gave me a T-shirt yesterday with the following quote from
"Stine." I can only figure it's R.L. Stine the writer...
"I wonder if one could tell the difference between
flying and falling if there was nothing to crash into..."
"In a world in which we are all slaves to the laws of gravity, I'm
proud to be counted as one of the freedom fighters. Skydive!"
--from Wendy Faulkner's .sig
"Good judgement comes from experience.
Experience? Well ... that comes from poor judgement!"
"Skydiving is a dangerous sport that can be done safely." --Bob Church
"Hook turns aren't really that hard. You just sort of get the hang of
them and they're really not a big deal." - Adam F., 1995 (said in all
seriousness as he lay in his hospital bed with brain swelling, a broken
back, a broken neck, and a shattered femur after a botched hook turn).
"Let's face it, there's a planet out there
...and it's aimed at your face!"
Bug Boy's rules of skydiving
1. There is no such thing as a perfectly good airplane.
2. 120 M.P.H. SHIT HAPPENS!
3. Refuse to die!
4. Don't screw with the ground!
5. Friends don't let friends jump pink!
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
At Z-Hills for a long time they had a sign which said
"open before impact"
My I/E (who's literally taught thousands of
1st jump students) told me something that makes a lot of sense.
His comment to me was, "don't bother waving, pointing yelling, etc. If
he goes below 3000', try to be where he sees you (should be all the
time, anyway, unless he's tracking away) and show him some silk".
"Nothing gets more attention of a student, than his jump master showing
him some canopy." --Keith Abner
Just remember this...
"Never try to outswoop your Guardian Angel" --George Galloway
"Where ignorance reigns, life is lost." Rage Against the Machine.
Brother Wayward's Thought for the day...
"Never, ever, ever, attempt a Skydive without going Parachuting
immediately afterwards!!!"
"100% pure adrenaline... ...other guys snort for it,
jab a vein for it... ...all you gotta do is jump"
"If at first you don't succeed, so much for skydiving!"
"If your hands become frozen and numb, pulling your handles
can be difficult, if not impossible. Not pulling your handles is bad."
--Charles Thomas in an article about winter skydiving
"If you're gonna be dumb, you'd better be tough"
"Take not thine altitude in vain,
or the earth shall arise and smite thee"
"And for only 3500 bottles and cans, you too can skydive..."
-DZ owner commenting on new recycling policy... (:
"Put on your gear and die like a man! " --Steve Morrell
"That antenna looks like a death sandwich without the bread!"
--Steve Morrell before a BASE jump
"A false sense of confidence is better than none at all!"
--John Owens
"Alcohol kills brain cells, but only the weak ones!"
--Anon
"I wouldn't say danger is my life, I prefer to think of it as a hobby."
--Chris Stokely
"There I was: Terminal at 800 ft, running out of ripcords and ideas!"
"Don't be stupid ... live to skydive tomorrow."
"I went low 'cause I blew a bootie"
My personal favorite is "Skydivers are good to the last drop!"
"Dangerous? He's a crater waiting for a grid reference."
Whuffo: (pointing to reserve handle)
"What will happen if I pull this handle?"
Up jumper: "Your nose will start bleeding."
"The sky is not the limit; The ground is." --Jamey Woodward
"I'll teach you how to jump on the wind's back, and then away we go."
--Peter Pan
"Black Death!! That dude is so dangerous ... he's a hole in the
ground that hasn't started smoking yet!!"
"Blue is up, and brown is down!!"
"If you want to experience the REALLY great outdoors, fly up in an
airplane and step OUTDOORS !"
"Eat! Fuck! Skydive!" - As quoted by Glenn Connelly
"Keith was one of my closest friends. He died with the helicopter
blades turning and the panavision cameras rolling. He lived to skydive
and looked for the ultimate challenges. Wish we could all be like
him. "
- Tony Mercer commenting on Keith Perepelkin's death while performing
a stunt for the movie 'Firestorm'.
"Keep cool after opening!" --sign on a can of baby food
"Don't trust a skydiver ... their cheques bounce.... "
"Skydivers know why birds sing ... They don't have to pack every
f*cking time they land!"
--Randy McConnell at the Richmond Boogie '96
"The best things in life are DANGEROUS!"
"If you bounce while skydiving, most people will feel sorry
for you and feel some pain, even if you screwed up. If you
bounce while BASE jumping, regardless of what you did, you're
just an asshole." -- As quoted by TK Hayes
"If you tend to make stupid mistakes, or exercise bad judgement, then
this may not be the sport for you." --Mike Vederman
"Bottom line: always exercise good judgement, always! Don't take
shortcuts with your life, check your gear. You have doubts, don't
leave the plane. Exercise good judgement." --Mike Vederman
"If the main malfunctions than cut it away and pull the reserve.
If the reserve malfuntions, than walk _toward_ the bright light!"
-- As quoted by David Harry
"My wife is on the rag. I'd rather go in than go home."
-- As quoted by David Harry
"If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too
much space!"
"If you're not living on the edge,
at least jump off it now and then!" --JC
"You know you're a skydiver when ....
.... blue sky on a working Monday after a rainy weekend
seems like a terrible waste of sunshine."
"Gravity's job is to kill you. Your job is to keep that from happening."
"It was a great skydive. Weather was fine, formation was good and
stable, level
okay.... and then came the exit."
"Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive."
"Statistics are used as a drunk uses lampposts -- for support, not
illumination." -- Neil Spence
"those who do, can't explain;
those who don't, can't understand" -- Keith Abner
"I love the smell of jet fuel in the morning..." -- Keith Abner
"Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. Security does not exist
in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it.
Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than exposure."
--Helen Adams Keller (1880-1968)
"If you're going to land with a ball of shit over your head, it should
be as big a ball of shit as possible." -- Bill Von Novak
While words are never enough, words are all I have to offer.
To those who knew Patti Chernis:
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am the essence of clear blue sky;
I am the yearning to climb very high.
I am the breeze you feel as you spot;
I am the rapture of building a blot.
I am the rustle of a canopy in flight;
I am the flicker of camp fire light.
When you pass through the door into open air,
I know you are smiling, I'm the wind in your hair.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there; I did not die.
Allen Roulston
June 1996
"It's the safest thing in the world, but it can kill you."
"Spend hours and hours teaching them how to save their lives, then open
the door and trust God." --Rob H. D-9286
"Know skydiving, know life..... NO skydiving, NO life"
--Serge Valkeneers
On Golden Girls, Rose's mother says to her:
"You know, stopping me from living won't stop me from dying".
"Skydiving is an invitation, a privilege audaciously and impolitely
granted, perfumed with danger and surprise, offering greater freedom
of movement, inviting one to live life at some other level.
... If one dares!"
"I live with fear and terror, but sometimes I leave her and
go skydiving."
"My fears about the airplane are RADICALLY reduced on exit."
"The only thing dangerous about skydiving is the ground."
"Don't play chicken with the ground. The ground doesn't flinch."
"No, I'm not afraid of falling into a void, it's the GROUND that
scares me!"
"It's not the fall that kills you - it's the sudden stop at the end."
"Of 10,000 feet of falling, it's the last inch that hurts the most."
"If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you !!"
"Air cooled, gravity powered."
"Gravity is a lie ... the earth sucks!"
"Parachuting is an adventure ... A rousing adventure which is as
thrilling and challenging and rewarding as any sport yet known to
any age." --Russ Gunby
"Apparently man has a need to have that hollow elevator feeling in
his stomach when he straps on a helmet." --Mike Truffer
"If the good Lord wanted man to stay on the ground, He would have
given us roots." --Anonymous
"The gull sees farthest who flies highest"
--Richard Bach in 'Jonathan Livingston Seagull'
"Skydiving is a game of odds. The object of the sport is to improve
your odds as much as possible." --Sandy Reid
"One of the great attractions of the sport to many of us is that it
demands competence and skillful decision-making under pressure"
--J. Scott Hamilton
"Just as planning prepares you mentally, group practice helps your
body get used to going through the motions."
"The exultation of seeing fine relative work is surpassed only by
the joy of being part of the jump yourself." --Pat Works
"The more advanced a canopy is, the more gentle you must be when
controlling it." --Charles Shea-Simmonds
"Skydiving - it's not just a matter of life and death ... it's
much more important than that."
"One never died of a pin check." --Paul Sitter
"Drugs and gravity don't mix too well"
"Be under no false illusions - skydiving can result in your death
- but it probably won't." --David Beaumont
"I decided that if I could fly for ten years before I was killed
in a crash it would be a worthwhile trade for an ordinary
lifetime." --Charles Lindbergh
"I'm still nervous during the ride up, but I know that I'll feel
great when I get out into the air!" --Mike Roam
"Never forget; every time you go through the door of an aircraft,
you're DEAD; until YOU do something about it". --Wayne Stevens
"Thank God man cannot as yet fly, and lay waste to the sky as well
as the earth" --Henry David Thoreau, 1861
"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn
from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent
disinclination to do so." -- Douglas Adams, Last Chance to See
"Every man dies, but not every man truly lives." --Wallace
"Keep pulling handles 'til your goggles fill with blood" --Anon
"To go in with any handles still in place is just bad form". --Anon
"You are only good until you think you are good, you are only safe until
you think you are safe." --various JMs.
Words to live by: "Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your
parachute" - Anon
"It 's not how far you fall, it's how high you bounce."
-- Anon (Concerning setbacks in life )
"Ever tried? Ever failed? Try again. Fail again. Fail better!"
-- Anon
"Skydiving: Where immortality is touched through danger, where life
meets death on equal plane; where man is more than man, and existence
both supreme and valueless at the same instant."-- Charles A. Lindbergh
"When it comes right down to it, we all must decide whether to live in
fear or faith. And living in fear just scares the shit out of me."
--Dave ?
"In freefall, no one can hear you scream."
"I tried golf ... after I hit my instructor with a 3 wood, he told me
to take a flying leap ... so I tried skydiving."
"Don't let the only mark you leave on this planet be the chalk circle
they draw around you when they find the body." -- Anon
"Earth is dangerous. Maybe we should sue the manufacturer."
-- Tina Marie
"Come to the edge, Life said. They said: We are afraid. Come to the
edge,
Life said. They came. Life pushed them ... and they flew."
--Guillaume Apollinaire
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