RhondaLea

Okay, in all seriousness, the running joke of the evening was that I was going to come back here and make a big deal out of skydivers taking me bowling. Apparently that has had the desired effect , however... ...the one thing about bowling (vs. all other possible activities) is that it gives people a chance to converse. And that we did do. The fact of the matter is that I was terrible company--I was totally beat, and I did not hold up my end well at all. But they were gentle with me, and for the hugs alone, it was worth the trip. And lets not forget the purpose and most important part of that leg of the trip: I met the two NC guys who redeem all the rest, and I came home with magic rocks. I would be interested to see, though, what jumper03 would come up with if I were to give him more lead time. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I see that RL is starting to catch on.... You guys are just going to have to ignore me this week. I'm in a very bad mood about one man, and it's affecting the way I feel about the human race. Ranting is not reality. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I find this thread offensive, by both its title and its content. But the above comment is ridiculous when one considers the other holidays we celebrate. The fact is that MLK did more to pave the way to equal treatment of blacks than George Washington did to pave the way to equal treatment of colonists. After all, George lived to be our first president. MLK died before his potential could be realized. I'm almost ashamed to be posting on a site that permits posts entitled "It's Black Guy Day!" rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

No, it doesn't. The analogy you made is a kind of generalization fallacy. And Chad didn't make a threat, he made a wish. Even without his experience, NPS has done more than enough to warrant an overflow of ill-feeling from the base community. Link is quite the achiever--a single post by one NPS employee is enough to incite base jumpers to bicker among themselves. You might want to keep in mind that no one ever got anywhere by sleeping with the enemy. Jason is right; it's going to take Congressional action or a lawsuit, and trying to worm your (used collectively) way just won't work, quite apart from the fact that even if it did, you (again used collectively) would always be subject to the whim of those in charge. rl (I guess my resolve to stay out of this forum isn't as strong as it ought to be, but this was worth taking another hit from Faber about his perception of my negativity.) If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Walt, You're wasting your time, and I don't care what he thinks of me. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

This is why men have failed to evolve from their origins. He's only 19, give him another 10-15 years to learn when to keep it to himself... That's not what I meant. Men have failed to evolve because they never have realized that there are other people like them. Women know this because we share. Men don't. And when a man does, he gets whacked. Men. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

This is why men have failed to evolve from their origins. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Just so you know, what you just described is very common. I suspect if most people here polled their own parents, they would have a story. http://www.babycenter.com/...ehavior/1250160.html If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Uh... I don't use drugs and I rarely drink, so no bar pickups for me. The only men I've been around for years and years are lawyers and parachutists, and I haven't been around too many lawyers (except the ones I currently work with, all of whom are married) in a long time. And at least one of these guys was a friend of mine for a very long time. But when we got involved, he showed me a side I'd never seen. Look, all this is predictable. There are a lot of great guys in the world, and I know quite a few of them. The defect in all this is what I'm attracted to, and the same characteristics that make a guy interesting to me are the same characteristics that make a narcissistic control freak. It's my issue because of the choices I make, even though I know better. The beginning of a relationship is the time to be very picky, so that one doesn't become involved with someone who has no hope of working out. Giving the benefit of the doubt at that time, when a thousand warning bells are going off, is not a smart move. I'm getting a lot better at cutting my losses sooner, but it's always painful. And worse still, it's my fault because it's the most easily preventable thing in the world. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Are you blocking me again, Jef? rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

For someone who is pathological, all the "helping with comprehension" in the world isn't going to do a damn thing to fix anything, because such people simply do not have the mental flexibility to see another point of view. A miserable son-of-a-bitch is going to continue to be a miserable son-of-a-bitch no matter what you do for him. But it is possible to add to the happiness of others, the same way it is possible to inflict misery upon them. In the latter case, when you come upon a black-and-white thinker, about all you can do is head for hills, because unless you have the hide of a rhino and nerves of steel, you'll never be happy around such a person. On the other hand, if being in a relationship didn't add to one's happiness, there would be no point in having relationships. The key (IMO) is having empathy for one's partner's needs and wants, and going as far as possible to accommodate them. That works with two normal people whose desire is to see their partner happy. In a situation where one partner is a control freak, the other partner can never do the right thing or enough of the right thing. The end result of that is that one partner is miserable as a function of his/her natural mental state and the other partner is miserable because the situation is impossible. There's only one solution to that, but some of us waste a lot of time coming to that conclusion. It's kind of like being responsible for one's own orgasm--it's a great idea in theory, but if we make the mistake of getting in bed with someone whose idea of sex is wham, bam, etc. (someone who, in spite of all effort, is not going to change how he/she performs), the choices are either to live life satisfaction-free or to masturbate. So I mostly agree with you, but the topic is "ways to please a man" and my post spoke to that and not to the general idea of making another person happy. rl Edited to add: Mostly my post spoke the fact that I have no idea what you do with someone who won't be pleased no matter what you do. I'm just a little mind-wiped today, I think. And very cranky from lack of sleep. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Y'know...it's just one of those biological mishaps. Too eager, failure. Not eager enough, failure. Too much to drink, failure. Tired, failure. It's really no big deal, but the way some guys act about it, you really would think it's where they keep their brains. Men don't realize that women have the same problem at times. It just happens. So you go do something else until the urge strikes and you try again. Or not. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

So am I. I have no idea what works. I finally asked my therapist, an old Army psychologist, if it was me. (I was married to a diagnosed narcissist at the time.) He told me that I when I finally picked a "normal" (i.e., non-pathological) guy, I'd have a normal relationship. I know how I am in a relationship, but I manage to pick men who want to run my life as well as their own...and when confronted with my resistance--in short, definitive sentences--they would express bewilderment at my "psycho behavior." The guy who had a list (I still have it somewhere) of all the things I was going to be doing for rest of my life--his goals for me, none of which were things I had any desire to do. But to be the wife he wanted me to be...well, you get the idea. The guy who married for my money (well, I don't have any, but at the time, he figured I would inherit from my grandparents, and he was prepared to wait). In the meantime, his idea was that I should be the house slave. The guy who...well, it doesn't matter...the point is that there are some guys (and I think I've run into all of them in my 47 years) who are such control freaks that, for them, a woman is like an appliance. And God forbid she should want to do anything when unplugged. I'll do just about anything to make someone I care for happy, but I'm not a Stepford Wife, and it seems there are a lot of men who want one. I keep trying though. They can't all be crazy. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I have more than one. How to choose, how to choose? If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Why must you write things like this? rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

That was utterly awesome... The phone showed a 407 area code, so (as you know), it didn't register with me at first where you were calling from. I'm really glad I got to talk to you, Mike. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Well, as everyone knows by now, NC and SC are unhealthy for my phone. That SunCom megamonster takes it over, and all anyone gets is a busy signal when they try to call me. If not for Lisa Marie, I'd be in Canada by now... Before I hit the SC border, however, I heard from Mike Neal (that was so cool, dude!) and Walt (also cool, but a big difference in mileage). I was right outside of Lumberton at about 4:00-4:30, and I still hadn't heard from Jumper03 and McDuck, but Lisa Marie managed to get in touch with Steven, who'd already tried to call me several times, and I was then able to call him. yamtx73 managed to leave a message for me right after I got to Lumberton, and I talked to him the next day. And here's what I have to say about that: he laughs better than anyone else I know. Here's the word: If you go to North Carolina, the skydivers there take you to the bowling alley. That's all I have to say. Except... ...for the younger women, DoTheDrew is adorable... ...McDuck is one lucky guy. Cora is one of the friendliest, coolest women I've ever met in my life. She just radiates joy. ...I'm not going to mention Steven's ball...but he did show up with magic rocks, and I figure they're enough to keep me from spilling the beans. (He's also very cute in his hat.) ...and, finally, McDuck's eyes are not real. He had to tell me who he was, even though I met him at his house. I was totally beat by the time I arrived (I was runnin' on three hours of sleep), but even though I was terrible company, they were still nice to me. North Carolina is redeemed. After 9 hours of sleep, I headed to Atlanta and Skydive the Farm. Lisa forgot the organ donor card, but I didn't remind her. Safer. For those who have never seen her, she's tall and pretty and she has an incredible voice. Her boys are adorable, as is the dzo's daughter. Which reminds me--if all dropzone owners were as friendly and nice as Hans, it would be a blessing. I've never met anyone quite like him. The folks who jump at Skydive the Farm are very lucky indeed, on all counts. Note to PJ: You're very lucky I didn't come to pack for you. I learned this weekend that I don't even remember how to set the brakes (well, okay, now I do). The drive home took forever, but all in all, it was worth it. I'm just sorry that this tale doesn't do justice to the fun I had. I'm writing this on the fly...I came back to a...situation, I guess you'd call it...and I have to get running to do some things. rl P.S. to Dave: Who knew that you don't have caller ID? It never occurred to me. My feelings were very hurt that you didn't call, but I guess I have to forgive you, even if you're still living in the 20th century. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

1384 miles and many hours later... Time to sleep.

Oh, believe me, you'll hear from at least one of us. I sure hope so. I'm packed, and I'm leaving....NOW. Wheeeeeee! If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

We're being sexist here. Try to keep up. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

I know. But it's almost 800 miles. Unless you're keeping me, it's too far for this weekend. OTOH, it's only about four or five hours from New Jersey. I keep telling you: come to DeLand. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

He does it on purpose. Sometimes, all you can do is laugh. But he's kinda like PJ, in a way. They keep forgetting that I'm only a couple of hours north, and I know where to find them. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

And some of them do lie about it...which is more hurtful (to me, anyway) than all the other lies put together. The last guy who did it broke my heart into very small pieces. Not all women use sex to get their way. Some of us like it just as much as (if not more than) guys, so using it as a trump card would be an example of "cutting off nose to spite face." You can go stand in the corner now. If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

Okay, I'm going upstairs to take a nap now. When I wake up, I'll do the whole morning routine, make some tuna wraps (no fast food for me), and get out on the road for a weekend without a cigarette (well, maybe I'll still be smoking until I get out of Florida, but no more than that). I'll post right before I walk out the door. If anyone (that means you, Walt Appel, because I'm sure to forget your number) wants to call and keep me company while I drive, the number is 386-847-0186. If I don't like your area code, I won't answer. More seriously, there are dead spots on I-95, so leave a message. LisaMarie, I'll see you in the early afternoon or on Sunday, depending on departure time. Kevin, if I don't hear from you guys, I'm going to Canada. Krisanne, this was a great idea. Thank you. rl If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

You figure Cocheese is probably totally green with envy right now? If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb