boinky

I was the middle child, so I got spankings on both ends. She'd make us go out and pick a switch. We would, of course, go out and pick some tiny, spindly thing. She'd use that on us....then go out and pick the tree and spank us with that too! When I was growing up, I swore her favorite phrase was, "This is going to hurt me a lot more than it's gonna' hurt you." Of course, being a kid, I didn't understand it at all. Now that I have children of my own....it breaks my heart every time I have to punish them. . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Thanks hon. I just KNEW you'd come through for me! . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Hey...Was your mom related to my mom, by chance? . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Psssttt.....check out my clicky. It gives you more info than you will ever need/want about who/what I do. . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Thanks Chris. You're a doll! But sadly, I can't spend restaurant gift certificates on jumps . But if I could...you'd be the first one I'd buy a jump for! . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

I don't mind at all. For most of you, it's going to seem quite trivial, but for me I just wanted to finally say I won one. Click here Poker to see all the information about the tournaments I play in. The big thing is that we vie for points. Only the top 20 get points. Last night there were over 65 people playing. Supposedly, I will earn around 650 points for this win. Accumulating enough points gets you invitations to bigger tournaments that offer bigger prizes and buy-ins to cash games in other cities. They just had a National Invitational last weekend in St. Louis, Missouri that I was invited to. The local restaurant I won in last night gave away 3 gift certificate prizes. 1'st-$20. 2'nd-$10. 3'rd-$5. Once again, the prizes aren't cash, nor are they huge. But for me, it was all about the pride of finally coming in 1'st.

After 6 months and what sometimes seems like a million tournaments, I FINALLY did it! I WON MY VERY FIRST TEXAS HOLD 'EM TOURNAMENT! . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

My Mother Taught Me About: 1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION... "Just wait until your father gets home." 2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING. . .. "You are going to get it when we get home!" 3. My Mother taught me LOGIC... "If you fall out off that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 4. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE. . . "What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don't talk back to me!"` 5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE... "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." 6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD... "If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job." 7. My Mother taught me HUMOR... "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 8. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT... "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 9. My Mother taught me about GENETICS... "You're just like your father." 10. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS... "Do you think you were born in a barn?" 11. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE... "When you get to be my age, you will understand." And last but not least... 12. My Mother taught me about JUSTICE... "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you....Then you'll see what it's like!" . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

A couple decide to go for a meal on their anniversary and after some deliberation decide on their local Chinese restaurant. They peruse the menu and finally agree to share the chef's special Chicken Surprise. The waiter brings over the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot. Just as the wife is about to start in on the meal, the lid of the pot rises a tiny amount and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down. "Jesus, did you see that?" she asks her husband. He hasn't, so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and this time he sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid firmly slams back down. Rather perturbed he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening and demands an explanation. "Well sir", says the waiter, "What did you order?" "We both chose the same", he replies, "the Chicken Surprise." "Oh I do apologise, this is my fault" says the waiter... ¯ ¯ ¯ ¯ ¯ ¯ ¯ ¯ "I've brought you the Peking Duck!" . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

OK...I'm going to his defense and prove my point about his being a nice guy. She originally picked out a beautiful pink dress on line, seeing as pink is her favorite color. He went out and ordered his tux to match her on that assumption. I raised hell at $140 for a dress that she was only going to wear once...not to mention the difficulties or order returns online, should it not meet her expectations. Long story, but she went to "Prom World" here in Atlanta with some friends and picked THAT dress out. I went to pick it up, and told them that the dress was pink. You could've knocked me over with a feather, when they showed me THIS dress! When the young man found out what happened, he had also already ordered the matching pink boutineer and the wrist corsage. To help the blue tie in with the pink, he had them put blue lace all around her pink roses. Now if THAT isn't a [B]NICE GUY,[/B] then I don't know what is! . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Sigh.... Isn't she though? I try to tell her that as often as possible! Since I recall you knowing a lot about some "weird" stuff, do ya' think they still make chastity belts? LOL Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

AWWWWW... . Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Can a personality be part of one's body? I think most people are attracted to me because of my bouncy/pouncy personality. If that doesn't count, then I guess my eyes would have to be my best asset. They're green, but sparkle when I am really happy and change colors with my moods.

Yeah, unfortunately, I do. I've urged her to go with this one. Instead, she chases after another one that makes her cry all the time because he hurts her feelings. Now HIM? I'd like to break both of [B]HIS[/B] legs!!!

LOL Nah...I had no worries here. She won't "go out" with him because she says "He's too nice." Damn..what's up with girls/women? They won't seriously date the nice ones but will trot after the bad ones like a dog in heat. Go figure.... Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Here...let me make you feel old WITH me. This is my gorgeous 16 year old daughter just before her first prom this year! And this differs from relationships in adulthood how? Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

OK...let's try this again. As part of the divorce settlement he got the house and the truck... I delivered the truck myself yesterday. While this is funny as shit, this IS only a joke! Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

LOL. I can at least solve the unnamed mountain part! Mt. St. Helen's Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

All I can say is "WOW!!!" Edited to add: Now that I have your attention...Oooppsie!!! Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Our Quote for the day.... Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

A Most Interesting Proposal A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after work cocktail with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy middle-aged man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off him. The young-at-heart man noticed her overly attentive stare and walked directly toward her (as all men will). Before she could offer her apologies for so rudely staring, he leaned over and whispered to her, "I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how 'unusual,' for $20.00......on one condition." (There are always conditions) Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. The man replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words." (controlling, huh?) The woman considered his proposition for a moment, then slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed into the man's hand along with her address. She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly, and meaningfully said.... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ."Clean my house." Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Wouldn't you love to have this attendant on your next flight Thanks to a retired Delta Captain for sending this "paraphrase" of a memorable safety PA (public announcement)from their Flight Attendants. In his own words.... "I was flying to San Francisco from Seattle this weekend, and the flight attendant reading the flight safety information had the whole plane looking at each other like "what the heck?" (Getting Seattle people to look at each other is an accomplishment.) So once we got airborne, I took out my laptop and typed up what she said so I wouldn't forget. I've left out a few parts I'm sure, but this is most of it." (BEFORE TAKEOFF) Hello and welcome to Alaska Flight 438 to San Francisco. If you're going to San Francisco, you're in the right place. If you're not going to San Francisco, you're about to have a really long evening. We'd like to tell you now about some important safety features of this aircraft. The most important safety feature we have aboard this plane is ...... The Flight Attendants. Please look at one now. There are 5 exits aboard this plane: 2 at the front, 2 over the wings, and one out the plane's rear end. If you're seated in one of the exit rows, please do not store your bags by your feet. That would be a really bad idea. Please take a moment and look around and find the nearest exit. Count the rows of seats between you and the exit. In the event that the need arises to find one, trust me, you'll be glad you did. We have pretty blinking lights on the floor that will blink in the direction of the exits. White ones along the normal rows, and pretty red ones at the exit rows. In the event of a loss of cabin pressure these baggy things will drop down over your head. You stick it over your nose and mouth like the flight attendant is doing now. The bag won't inflate, but there's oxygen there, I promise. If you are sitting next to a small child, or someone who is acting like a small child, please do us all a favor and put on your mask first. If you are traveling with two or more children, please take a moment now to decide which one is your favorite. Help that one first and then work your way down. In the seat pocket in front of you is a pamphlet about the safety features of this plane. I usually use it as a fan when I'm having my own personal summer. It makes a very good fan. It also has pretty pictures. Please take it out and play with it now. Please take a moment now to make sure your seat belts are fastened low and tight about your hips. To fasten the belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle. To release, it's a pulley thing -- not a pushy thing like your car, because you're in an airplane -- HELLO. There is no smoking in the cabin on this flight. There is also no smoking in the lavatories. If we see smoke coming from the lavatories, we will assume you are on fire and put you out. This is a free service we provide. There are two smoking sections on this flight, one outside each wing exit. We do have a movie in the smoking sections tonight ... hold on, let me check what it is ... Oh here it is ... the movie tonight is "Gone With the Wind." In a moment we will be turning off the cabin lights, and it's going to get really dark, really fast. If you're afraid of the dark, now would be a good time to reach up and press the yellow button. The yellow button turns on your reading light. Please don't press the orange button unless you absolutely have to. The orange button is your seat ejection button. We're glad to have you with us on board this flight. Thank you for choosing Alaska Air, and giving us your business and your money. If there's anything we can do to make you more comfortable, please don't hesitate to ask. If you all weren't strapped down you would have given me a standing ovation, wouldn't you? (AFTER LANDING) Welcome to the San Francisco International Airport. Sorry about the bumpy landing. It's not the Captain's fault. It's not the Copilot's fault. It's the Asphalt. Please remain seated until the plane is parked at the gate. At no time in history has a passenger beaten a plane to the gate. So please don't even try. Also, please be careful opening the overhead bins because "shift happens." Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

....could you please give me directions to the local airport?" Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

His job won't let him postwhore with us anymore. They said he was on the internet too much. Can you imagine? Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance

Although you can't play with us anymore, you're never far out of our thoughts!