npgraphicdesign

Did BP put Mel Gibson's mouth over it? (Not my joke..heard it on a local radio show today)

I'm really glad my government education didn't preclude me from getting that You'd be surprised how many people respond to that joke with either... a. No it doesn't. Who is he? b. Yes it does. Where's the joke? I am usually cracking up after either of those answers

My favorite one-liner joke: Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? Favorite witticisms from Yogi Berra It's like deja-vu, all over again. If you come to a fork in the road, take it. We have deep depth. We made too many wrong mistakes. You wouldn't have won if we'd beaten you. It was impossible to get a conversation going; everybody was talking too much. It gets late early out there. I didn't really say everything I said. Favorite witticisms from Rodney Dangerfield When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. My problem is that I appeal to everyone that can do me absolutely no good. I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. I know how to satisfy my wife in bed... I leave. What are your favorite one liners/witticisms?

I don't think that will happen, she doesn't have a very high opinion of skydivers. Why not? Tell her I"m only pretending to be a skydiver...

A man is evaluated by the company he keeps. Wendy P. Well then... So, how YOU doin'?

Let's go back to your original post: Wendy P. So my reputation is your fault???

She's 21 and very cute. I'll make sure to tell her to put the alarm on too. But...but...I'm a good boy. When the hell did I get THIS reputation???

Sorry I can't help. I'll be taking my son off to college on those days, and there's no way I'm leaving you alone in my house with my daughter. Hahah...if she's 21+ you'd be in trouble. If she's under 21, I'd be a babysitter. Hell, all I need is a couch!!!

When ya coming down? I'll be there August 16/17-18/19.

We need to work on your sales skills. Hahahaha

BJJ is good for a workout and to learn how to wrestle/grapple/defend yourself/etc. Oh and watch these two videos. You won't need to learn anything else. Bas Rutten Self Defense 1 Bas Rutten Self Defense 2

Going to stay at those DZs for 3 days each during the 3rd week of august. Anyone have a spare couch for a few nights? Will pay in food and beer. I have references from this website.

Ugh ... I'm glad I'm not alone. I ran into this more than once and got me thinking that perhaps I need to start driving a different car, lie about my employment situation when it comes up in the conversation and hide/downplay any other signs that I do OK for myself ... O Why lower yourself to other people's insecurities? It's not worth it and you don't deserve it.

The first date could definitely be low key, but even then I would pick up the tab, regardless of who asked whom out, if she offered, etc. If your date offers, it's a nice gesture, and somewhat unexpected (at least in my experience.) But if after several dates, your date still acts like it's expected of you to pick up the tab, doesn't offer even once to split the tab, and more importantly doesn't even say thank you (a simple 'thank you for the drinks/food/etc' isn't too much to ask is it?), that makes me wary. I dated someone for 2 months, and in that time she paid once for a coffee for both of us. After two months, that could've given me a clue, but the straw that broke my back was when we went to Philly to meet some friends for an art show, and I casually said "Why don't I pay for the museum tickets and you cover the lunch?" to which she says "Now, you know that I think the guy should pay for everything all the time." As soon as we returned from Philly, I dropped her off at home, said goodnight and goodbye, and went home.

Yes you did...congrats. I know what you need...you need a tall, dark and handsome Russian skydiver. In fact, I even know someone like that... Still high from the drugs huh? Hahahaha...sheddap.

Yes you did...congrats. I know what you need...you need a tall, dark and handsome Russian skydiver. In fact, I even know someone like that...

I picked up on that in the emergency room. Ten minutes after the first IV pain meds were administered, all I had to say was "ow" and I received a second dose. Worked like a charm... On a side note, my pain was about a 9 out of 10.

So my last weekend was spent in a hospital because a bad reaction to an antibiotic turned into something that has yet to be determined by the doctor. But, while I was in the hospital, I had plenty of time to think of a funny list that described what I learned in those 3 days at the hospital. Here they are, in no particular order. 1. No matter the time of day, the amount of stress, or how busy the staff is, they always respond to humor/sarcasm (yes even mine!) and it makes their time easier. 2. I now understand why people get addicted to pain medications. Those IV-delivered pain medications felt...ooohhh...so great! Probably moreso because of the actual pain 3. They give you vague answers to make you feel better. Good thing I come from a medical family and have been educated regarding hospitals... 4. It's pointless to flirt with the nurses, because they think you just want more pain meds... 5. I still will never know why they want to provide a (mostly) healthy 30yo male with a wheelchair when he can obviously walk out on his two feet. 6. You will never get a good night of sleep at a hospital. 7. Liquid diets are great...no really. Especially when the bottles have a % denomination on the front. 8. Medical equipment has a mind of its own. Just when you fall asleep, it starts beeping for no apparent reason. 9. Just because you've been trained as a nurse, doesn't mean that when blood needs to be drawn, you can find someone's vein on the first try...or second try...or third try...or fourth try... 10. Get in, get as healthy as possible as soon as you can, and get out. Oh and talk about target fixation...too many cute nurses on my floor.....yoooowwzzzaaaa!!! Of course, that didn't help. See #4.

About that time of the month, eh Bry?

I'm no mooch, but I don't do cheap. Peace out! That's...bad.

Hey Bolas! You're referring to this place? http://www.skydivethefarm.com/

What are you coming down for, just to jump? Z-hills right? Well I plan to drive from CT to FLA, stop by one or two DZs along the coast, and then settle in for a week at some DZ in Florida. Zhills sounds like a good spot

From CT to FLA...within an hour drive from I95? What are some good DZs to swing by for a jump or two if I"m driving down the East Coast?

When I visited Elsinore, I got in touch with her through DZ.com and she picked me up the airport, showed me around, and was sweet, generous and accommodating. She is truly a good selfless person. More people like her and the world would be a better place. MUAH...or should I say.MOOOOOAAAHH?