sdgregory

A boy gets on a public bus and sits next to a man with his collar on backwards. The boy asks him why his collar is on backwards. The man, a priest, says, "I am a father." The boy says, "My dad is a father and he does not wear his collar backwards." The priest says, "I am a father of many." "So's my dad. I have 5 brothers and four sisters," says the boy. "I am a father of hundreds," says the priest. The boy then replies, "Maybe you should be wearing your pants backwards instead."

Dude, I thought that was me!

If I do not like it I will not say anything. I see not point in being a jackass. Now if the person is acting like they made the coolest video ever and everyone has gotta love it, and it sucks, well, they opened the door so I get to sock them in the nose. If I honestly like the vid, I will say so. If I do not I will say nothing at all. I will not, hoever lie about it and say ooo great vid if I don't think it is. Of course as a newbie any slydiving video is better than mine so I probably will at least enjoy it once. Now if the video was made by someone I know, even a little bit, then I will tell them the whole honest truth. Especially if I did not like it and the person who made it is this dude Eric who goes by Ph . . .

I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CAN NOT LIE! BABY GOTTA HAVE BACK! I must admit I like a larger butt. I like women to be thick (but not obese). A little on the plus side. I want a little jiggle when I smack the booty. I want thighs that can wrap me and squeeze tight and I do not want to feel any bones. I like wider hips. The child bearing kind. I also do not want her to be taller than me nor shorter than 5 foot, actually, 5' to 5'4" is perfect. I absolutely do not like skinny girls. Thin girls are cute but they won't eat like I do. I want a girl who can chow down like me. Boobs are great but I guess a boob is a boob to me as long as it is real. I want a pretty face (have to be able to look at her without thinking "whoa ugly!"). Truth be told, the face is the most important part. 90 percent of time together will be spent looking at that one part. Especially during conversation. Gotta be attractive there. I am not a fan of blondes, gotta be brown, brunette or red-head. In fact I have only loved one blonde in my life and she happens to be 11. Nothing against blondes, but I just like darker hair. Oh, and complexion matters but skin tone/color does not. Actually if you look at my ideal woman it sounds like the exact opposite of the most popular. Maybe I am just a rebel, but I like what I like. Edit to add: I find Queen Latifa purtty damn sexy.

So what are you saying? He can't eat deer, cheetahs, horses, greyhounds and foxes?

Heh. I'm 23 (will be 24 this month) I wear a 11 1/2 or 12 shoe I weigh 250lbs All striaght up truth, there's no reason to lie about any of that. I'm with you dude Why would those be the things people lie about? 32 8.5 to 9 depending on shoe 197.5 lbs (now) Here's what I lie about 19 - number of times my nuts have fallen off (This only happened twice) 5 - Highest grade I completed (it was actually 4) 1 - number of times I wore a bra in public (okay so I did not really do this once . . . it was twice!) Bwaaaaahahahahahahahahaha.

I'm freeeeeeeeeee... Freee ballin'! Yeah I'm Freeee Free ballin'. Hahahahahahaha First do Underoos count as whitey tighties? Actually I wear boxer briefs baby. My boys are too damn big to be dangling around. Does anyone wear those weird 80's grape smuggling things still? I never understood why anyone would wear those.

Oh yeah, we are counting on ya being there. You can definitely amke it up to him. Boys are more forgiving with their moms. Play that card well.

Don't think I have that much money. How about I bring a case of something and we let it go at that? And the first one to say a case of scotch/whiskey/rum/anything other than beer gets a punch in the nose.

The lucky person you will be going to the Golden Gate Bridge with.

You are freakin' smashed dude. Who's the lucky . . . um . . . person?

This is not the first time I have seen something like this and, frankly, it pisses me off. That a lawyer would even take this case is why I have such disdain for the profession and it gives honest lawyers (is that an oxymoron?) a bad name. The Geckle family should sue the burglar's family for not teaching him better. I allege that had the parents done their job and the wife been more effective in her duties and the son gotten a job, maybe this guy would not have become a burglar.

Um, there was that one President that did that thing that time in reference to that place where that stuff was going on. You remember?

Hey Larry, You and me both! First Boogie. First DZ.com boogie. First Jumps outside of Ohio. Hey will I be allowed to do the beach jumps I keep hearing about? (Could be another first.) First jumps in my home state. (That could fall under non-ohio though right?) Probably be first jump out of certain aircraft (God I hope they will have some tailgate style planes!) Between you and I we could keep the place well stocked with beer!

Because if I went another day without fullfilling a 27 year old dream I was going to loose my mind. Because I knew it was the one thing I was absolutely born to do. Because it was a fire in my blood and each day that I did not try it my blood burned inside and it was painfull. Because . . . it is a deep seeded NEED!

Don't make me seperate you two!

It's liberal because YOU said it. Bwahahahaha. Actually, I saw your thought process

Yo mamma's like a bowling ball She gets picked up, fingered, rolled down the alley and comes back for more. Your momma's like a tv set anyone can turn her on. Your momma's like a bubble gum machine, a penny a blow. Your momma's like the village bicycle, everyone gets a ride. Oh yeah, and get off momma's I just got off yours.

This was supposed to be funny. Oh well I had fun

14:7:10 7 hours each day of sleep 7 jumps : 3 on Saturday 4 on Sunday 10 firsts! Boy do I owe some serious beer. Dare I list them all?

You bet you ass I did! That was one of the many highlights of yesterday! Of course it took me 6 tries to finally hit it.

That's all that counts, cause you are the bytch! I can live with that too

Has this been posted before?

I; among others would disagree with that statement. Why? I have a Raven-M too and would like to know.

Taking a human life, no matter how much you hate the person, stays with you. I would not want his face in my dreams forever.