R00tj00se

*This is bullshit. Half the people that drive or ride horses haven't had a friend that has died in the activity. Skydiving isn't as dangerous as a lot of people think, but it isn't as safe as a lot of skydivers like to say it is.* Er, ever heard of percentages?

And the local women in the Brackley retirement home are going to get a few days left alone - instead of being taken up the arse every weekend (it happens folks!)

Clit swinging eh? Emma, I think you just found your niche in the porn movie market!

It was probably longer than 5 - 10 secs because you had 2 out.

Just out of curiosity - why couldn't she find her soft reserve handle? Had it been folded back on itself? Did she not check before exit or did it happen in freefall?

Ok, I know I should be having images of the woman in red (and I am) but at the back of my mind is the 'tube stow round the reserve handle'! That guy would be grounded for a loooong time in the UK.

Man, that's a bit deep for a Monday.

Is she a MILF?

Let me rephrase what I said - there's still at least an hour of surfing to go!!

Hey E150, Have u got a part time job or something, there's at least an hour of work to go.

I can't believe this post has sunk to the 2nd page without someone making lame jokes about: Flaps Low pulls Deployment bags Riser slap Monkey fist(ing) - I'm struggling here Or is just my warped mind. *Bored at work.*

Off to Spain eh? Is it Empuria. Very nice DZ - just remember to check the spot before you get out.

Hey Mr. 3 DZ funeral must have been tough. Will speak to you about it next time I see you - don't like posting about things like that on the net. As for did I have a feeling of calm. Nope! After my first cut-away last year I did - felt as though I could survive anything after that. But after this one I was one quiet little bunny for a couple of days. But as the saying goes: 'You can do everything right in skydiving, and still die' Anyway, enough morbid thoughts - I won't be up this weekend but will be the weekend after. I need to borrow a FF suit until I get mine sorted so if you know of anyone? Or is that jumpbubble suit still available at the DZ?

F*ckin' stoopid game!!

Not true, some of them start: "I was young, I needed the money..." ...or is that just me?

Well, in the interests of skydiving research I did a quick search on google.co.uk and came up with this link (however, do not go to this site at work, it has adult content). You have been warned: http://www.1sev.com/5527.html And no, I did not order it!

No, didn't fire. I really wish I'd looked at my alti after reserve deployment though - would be nice to know when I was open.

Posted this in reply to the low pull thread - as it took me so long to write and it's a pretty good "No shit..." story I thought I'd give it its own post: ___________________________________________________ Well, for all you guys that like/liked to pull low here is a bit of a 'No shit, there I was...' type story. First I'd like to say I consider myself a very sensible jumper and so do the people I jump with (I hope). I have about 350 jumps, fly an elliptical loaded at 1.1:1 (not much you might think) and before this incident I'd already had one cut away (not packed by me). So, anyway, no shit, there I was... Just finished a 2 way coached sit dive and I gave the wave off at 5,000ft. This was to be my second attempt at back tracking and it didn't go too well. I didn't pick my hips up so although I was moving away from my instructor I was still descending rapidly. So I decided to flip over flat and start to do a flat track. Now here comes mistake number 1. I held my flat track for too long a time - didn't realise how much altitude I had lost in that back track so that by the time I flared out of the track and checked my alti it was at about 2,200ft (I am usually waving off and going for the handle at 3,000ft). No problem I thought - just going to be a bit low on this one. There was no feeling of oh my god, gotta pull now. I just did a normal speed wave off and then reached for the handle. Opening seemed to be going as planned. I was brought into an upright position, all the lines were clear and the canopy was trying to inflate (slider still at the top) through the snivel. Then about a second after being brought upright I stayed on heading and the canopy did a fulll 180 and placed a twist about a foot below the slider. Straight away I knew I was getting off this thing and by the time I'd done the look, reach part of my cutaway procedure (which is 2 handed) I was spinning like a m*therf*cker (to quote my coach who saw it all happen). Ellipticals wind up quick, even lightly loaded ones. I'd already had one cutaway so this was no big deal. It was all done very calmly. After getting rid of the main things took a turn for the worse. Because I'd been spun about I was shot off spinning on my back and I tried to arch to get stable. Er, whats wrong, why am I not getting stable. I know, try rolling, that'll get you over onto your belly - nope, still not happening. At the same time as trying to get stable I've got the thought running through my mind - "Don't forget you were low when you pulled and you can't rely on the Cypres" (Okay, time for a quick interlude. Why couldn't I get stable? I don't know. I mean for God's sake, I was freeflying and back tracking. I can get stable in less than a second from any of those positions. I can only presume that having less airspeed and being dis-oriented after a spinning mal contributed to it. If this had happened to someone else instead of me I probably would have said that they shouldn't be skydiving if they can't get stable but it is different in this kind of situation). So, after a couple of seconds of trying to get stable I pulled the reserve handle thinking: (a) Better to have something rather than nothing (b) I don't want to be a Cypres save. (I really did think both those things) Imagine my surprise when the reserve pilot chute comes between my legs and the free bag (with the reserve still in it) pops up on my right hand side (me still on my back) and the bridle line is under my right leg with parts of it flapping around my right arm. I'll never forget seeing that freebag with the lines still stowed. My eyes popped out of my head, my heart froze and I shouted 'Oh fuck' inside my full face. I'm not looking for sympathy or trying to play this thing up but I honestly thought I was dead. I remeber a post on one of these forums which asked what you would think about if you were going in and people said they would look at the sky, think of songs etc. What a load of shit. The only thing going through my mind was 'Fuck, I've got to get this thing off my leg'. So while pulling my right arm in to stop the bridle line from wrapping around it I reached for the pilot chute which was now tapping against my left leg. As I did this my body position changed and I went head down and feet up slightly and the pilot chute was able to find a free channel of air. I estimate that the pilot chute was stuck for about 2 secs. The reserve (techno 128) opened with no problems and I landed about half a mile away from the main landing area near my pilot chute. Sorry, don't know what height my reserve was open at as I was busy taking deep breaths and swearing I was never going to jump again. I jumped again the same day and am still jumping however with a lot less confidence than I used to have. What did I do wrong: (i) went low That is the only thing I consider I did wrong on this jump. You may consider that pulling my reserve on my back was wrong but ask yourself this question - How long do you spend recovering stability when you know you have pulled low? I think I spent the right amount of time. So, if you think going low is fun and looks cool, just remember it could be the first link in that chain of events... Also, if you check the statistics web site you'll see a UK jumper died under similair circumstances a few years ago. Did a low jump, Stiletto spun and he got entangled in the reserve. One more thing to think about before hopping on that elliptical.

Well, for all you guys that like/liked to pull low here is a bit of a 'No shit, there I was...' type story. First I'd like to say I consider myself a very sensible jumper and so do the people I jump with (I hope). I have about 350 jumps, fly an elliptical loaded at 1.1:1 (not much you might think) and before this incident I'd already had one cut away (not packed by me). So, anyway, no shit, there I was... Just finished a 2 way coached sit dive and I gave the wave off at 5,000ft. This was to be my second attempt at back tracking and it didn't go too well. I didn't pick my hips up so although I was moving away from my instructor I was still descending rapidly. So I decided to flip over flat and start to do a flat track. Now here comes mistake number 1. I held my flat track for too long a time - didn't realise how much altitude I had lost in that back track so that by the time I flared out of the track and checked my alti it was at about 2,200ft (I am usually waving off and going for the handle at 3,000ft). No problem I thought - just going to be a bit low on this one. There was no feeling of oh my god, gotta pull now. I just did a normal speed wave off and then reached for the handle. Opening seemed to be going as planned. I was brought into an upright position, all the lines were clear and the canopy was trying to inflate (slider still at the top) through the snivel. Then about a second after being brought upright I stayed on heading and the canopy did a fulll 180 and placed a twist about a foot below the slider. Straight away I knew I was getting off this thing and by the time I'd done the look, reach part of my cutaway procedure (which is 2 handed) I was spinning like a m*therf*cker (to quote my coach who saw it all happen). Ellipticals wind up quick, even lightly loaded ones. I'd already had one cutaway so this was no big deal. It was all done very calmly. After getting rid of the main things took a turn for the worse. Because I'd been spun about I was shot off spinning on my back and I tried to arch to get stable. Er, whats wrong, why am I not getting stable. I know, try rolling, that'll get you over onto your belly - nope, still not happening. At the same time as trying to get stable I've got the thought running through my mind - "Don't forget you were low when you pulled and you can't rely on the Cypres" (Okay, time for a quick interlude. Why couldn't I get stable? I don't know. I mean for God's sake, I was freeflying and back tracking. I can get stable in less than a second from any of those positions. I can only presume that having less airspeed and being dis-oriented after a spinning mal contributed to it. If this had happened to someone else instead of me I probably would have said that they shouldn't be skydiving if they can't get stable but it is different in this kind of situation). So, after a couple of seconds of trying to get stable I pulled the reserve handle thibking: (a) Better to have something rather than nothing (b) I don't want to be a Cypres save. (I really did think both thtose things) Imagine my surprise when the reserve pilot chute comes between my legs and the free bag (with the reserve still in it) pops up on my right hand side (me still on my back) and the bridle line is under my right leg with parts of it flapping around my right arm. I'll never forget seeing that freebag with the lines still stowed. My eyes popped out of my head, my heart froze and I shouted 'Oh fuck' inside my full face. I'm not looking for sympathy or trying to play this thing up but I honestly thought I was dead. I remeber a post on one of hese forums which asked what you would think about if you were going in and people said they would look at the sky, think of songs etc. What a load of shit. The only thing going through my mind was 'Fuck, I've got to get this thing off my leg'. So while pulling my right arm in to stop the bridle line from wrapping around it I reached for the pilot chute which was now tapping against my left leg. As I did this my body position changed and I went head down and feet up slightly and the pilot chute was able to find a free channel of air. I estimate that the pilot chute was stuck for about 2 secs. The reserve (techno 128) opened with no problems and I landed about half a mile away from the main landing area near my pilot chute. Sorry, don't know what height my reserve was open at as I was busy taking deep breaths and swearing I was never going to jump again. I jumped again the same day and am still jumping however with a lot less confidence than I used to have. What did I do wrong: (i) went low That is the only thing I consider I did wrong on this jump. You may consider that pulling my reserve on my back was wrong but ask yourself this question - How long do you spend recovering stability when you know you have pulled low? I think I spent the right amount of time. So, if you think going low is fun and looks cool, just remember it could be the first link in that chain of events... Also, if you check the statistics web site you'll see a UK jumper died under similair circumstances a few years ago. Did a low jump, Stiletto spun and he got entangled in the reserve. One more thing to think about before hopping on that elliptical.

I've been reading through the gear section about the Vengeance and some of the reviews refer to end cell closure on this canopy and the possibility of diving, off heading openings. Anyone have any further info on this as the last review was some time ago.

"play with you " By that comment, you do mean in the sky don't you?? Can never be too sure where your perversions are concerned. But when you and Alex are back in the air at Hinton we'll definitely go do something - and I have a PC-9 now as well. Also got a pretty good 'No shit, there I was...' story but I'll save that for a rainy weekend.

Before anyone has a go I have had a look through the archives and couldn't find anything relevant (how's that for going on the defensive)... Does anyone own one of the Tonysuits Spacesuit and what are your opinions. I've finally stopped cross dressing and admitted that I'm a freak so I'm looking for a FF suit. However, after doing some coaching jumps I've been told my fall rate in a sit is 'slooooooooowwwww! (Instructor was thinking of going on his belly to stay with me!!) when in an average sized suit so I thought I might try for a spacesuit as it is made for a racing snake like myself. cheers

C'mon 3, this thread isn't going to go away - the public has a right to know. If you don't come out of hiding soon we're going to start the bombing campaign on Abingdon followed by ground forces (and I don't mean Charlie Dimmock) to bring you out.

"MEDULA" The what?

Er, Emma, r u having a bad Monday. You seem a little bit on edge.