bluepill

Movies: American Psycho The Matrix Dusk till Dawn Music Puddle o Mud Pink Prince

An excellent dancy one is "Freefall" by Skydive which contains the fantastic lines of: "I feel wonderful I could skydive from the moon Sail an ocean on my fingertips When the wind screams my name" Mike

Yeh It is Impressing the girls or boys... Just amazes me how far we...(OK I ) am prepared to go. After I learned my lesson about not looking where Im going, the next opportunity I got I decided to briskly walk into the 'woman of my dreams' life with a bright smile and dandy walk. But this time as I appoached her for the "hey", a bird shat right on my leg!!!! Some things just aint meant to be

Hey I said "whats the dumbest" not "whats the smallest!"

Zeemax - No problem, if your there on Modany then lemmie know, I may come down to reintroduce myself. Sas - Whats Langar like these days??

Whats the dumbest thing you've done to impress the girls???? Mine has to be my "James dean Swagger". I saw her approaching me, walking towards me. My intention was to, not give her eye contact (at first), give it the mean and moody swagger towards her whilst looking at the ground, deep in thought. As I get real close and I raise from my swagger to give her the "hi" and smile and then CLUNK!!! Well I dident see the low pedestrain sign that knocked me clean out and made me spend the night in hospital....and I dident get the girl...way uncool. Still, thats not as bad as my old roomate who continues to try to impress new girls with his AFF video. Man who would stoop that low????

Hi Zee Yeh it sucks doesent it coming back from a place like Seb (Fl) to the UK "military style" DZ's. But most places, once they get to know you are pretty cool. I've particularly found Hinton to be a good vibe, but Im sure most DZ's are like that once they know your sticking around. Dont worry about your enthusiasm to do cool stuff before the basics. Im pretty sure everyone has felt like that at the start. Just be sure to listen to advice, no matter how hard it is to take... Dude, you said your funds are lacking....Just a tip M8, if you get a chance, on the weekend, then try to learn to pack....it will save you bucks in the long-run.... and erm its fun... If you do decide to learn then make sure you ask to learn on a new ZP Hope u get in the air. Mike

Well done on graduating AFF. Im not really experienced enough to give any advice, but I started juming with a friend who had the same problem (re backflips). The advice he got was: 1. Talk about any problems/difficulties with an instructor, who knows your abilities best. 2. Practice stuff high, and never try anything new or your unsure about near pulltime. Mike

A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. What's your secret for a long happy life?" "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also do a gramme of charlie a day, a spliff every night, a case of whiskey a week, eat junk food, never exercise, sit in the sun all day and do pills on the weekend." "That's amazing," said the woman, "how old are you?" "Twenty-six."

52. Skydiving isent half as scarey as saying "I Do"

Agree - very very bad Idea. Did it myself once, same situation, bought house together then broke up etc and decided to live it out for a while.... It dident work out, worse still, eventually everything she did irritated me more and more, so I went out with her sister In the property market today its probably a good idea to hold on to what you got. Maybe you can use the house as an joint investment and lease/rent it out so it pays for itself? (probably need some contract drawn up) Other than that, move out and move on. You've just started jumping, so moving back to base my not be so bad knowing that you can fly and your friendly sky is always there. Mike

Sure this has been done before, but im sooooo bored. What has been your best/funniest chat up line and or Knock back. I was in Barcelona on the weekend, and my friend kept going up to the girls and saying "would you like to see my weapon of mass destruction?" Most girls giggled or frowned... But one American girl replied with "I think you better get the inspectors in first hunny!!" Whats yours ??

Hmmmm cats the bane of my life. I grew up with cats and love them to bits, when we lived in Singapore my mum had 11 of them!! Always had cats, but where I live now, I cant have one. So why are they a pain? Well as much as I love cats, they love me even more back. I've never met a cat that doesent like me. They flock to me everywhere I go. You know that guy off of charlie brown with all the fly's round him, well thats me with cats. Examples: 1. Everyday I drive to work and park my car in the same place. There is a cat there, that wont let me walk off unless I've paid him attention. The same thing when I get back, I open the door and he jumps right in and sits on the passenger seat...refuses to leave. 2. More often than not if I date a girl and get invited back to theirs, there is always a cat. The girls gets annoyed cos their cat "has never been like that with anyone" and wont leave me alone. Its pretty hard to set the mood when a cat is so demanding. and Finally one time when I was staying in Florida, the owbers cat had given birth to a litter recently and one of the little kittys (6-8 weeks ols) decided I was gonna be mom. The little bighter refused to go anywhere other than snuggled up under my neck.. But in saying all that, still miss the cats..

I seem to remember the story of a guy who had a 'How low can you go' contest with his buddy. His buddy dumped at 1200 at which point the 1st guy gave the 'bird' to his deploying buddy, performed a back flip and then dunped. (From the book Freefall - sorry cant remember Author). I've never gone low intentionally. However my friend made the decision to go low whilst I was jumping with him. Since he dident tell me beforehand I assumed he had a serious problem when under canopy by 2000 I see him still in freefall below me. It freaked my right out!! He never fessed up to me but I later found out he did it intentionally which really annoyed me. He should have told me his plans so that I dident have to worry about his ass and wouldent have bothered shadowing his off-DZ landing to check he was OK. Needless to say I dont jump with that guy any more.

Congrats dudes !!

Lurking on another thread in another forum reminded me of these ode's. Enjoy One for the gals.. Penis breath, a lover's dread, Is what you get when you give head. Unpleasant as it tends to be, Be grateful that he doesn't pee. It's times like this, you wonder why, You bothered reaching for his fly. But it's too late, can't be a tease, Accept the facts, get on your knees. You know you've got a job to do, So open wide and shove it through, Lick the tip then take it all. Don't drag your teeth or he might bawl. Slide up and down, use your tongue. And feel the pre-cum start to run, Your jaw it aches, your neck is numb, So when the hell's he gonna cum? Just, when you can't take anymore, You hear your lover's mighty roar. And when he hits that real high note, You feel it oozing down your throat. Salty, fishy, sticky stuff, Okay already, that's enough. Let's switch you say, before you gag, And what revenge, you're on the rag! and one for the guys.. Eating out and chowing down, but tonight I'm not out on the town. Tonight I'm served a seafood dish, well at the least it tastes like fish. Time to overcome my fears, as she drags me down there by my ears, to feast upon her hairy pie, where pubes and stubble jab my eye. She lies back and moans and then softly sighs, I cant help thinking about scampi & fries. Don't lick too low, move up a bit, got to be careful or I'm in the shit. Nibble, lick, caress and stroke, the things I do just for a poke. Up, down and right a bit, where the hell does she keep her clit? I'll never find it here like this, pussy design just takes the piss. To find my way around her twat, I'll need a torch and miners hat. I think my tongue is failing me, Christ I hope she doesn't pee. I've been licking her minge for years. I wish I could breathe through my ears. God I hope that she comes quick, since my neck's developing a crick. I'm sweating like I've got a fever, under the covers, eating split beaver, I must have hit the right spot at last, her screams are gaining volume fast, her thighs clamp tight around my head, and her screams scare the neighbors out of bed. She's coming at last and making a racket, her thighs crushing my head like a discarded fag packet. I'm choking and spluttering but she doesn't care, that my mouth is full of fish flavoured hair. And that my face is smothered in thick fanny batter and juices that taste like a seafood platter. But she thinks it's funny, and starts taking the piss, but she soon stops her laughing, when I move in for a kiss.

She is definitely a two bagger... One for her and one for you, just in case hers falls off

Yeh I agree.

Not one to beat around the Bush (no pun intended - honest) I like the more direct love song.... 'Bring on the Nubiles' by The Stranglers. Chorus is cracking...and I aint quoting it here Hmmmmmm happy memories. Mike

Hi Jon and welcome aboard.

Hi all The Oscar nominations are in. It got me thinking and I would like to propose, how about some DZ.com Oscars? Not sure what the categorys should be, umm maybe start with: Best Picture Best Director (one for the moderators) Best True Story Best BS Story Baddest Ass Best Newbie .... Instead of the little statue's we could go for a suitable prize..EG a Red fork for the baddest ass or a C thru T for the best girl What do ya all think? Any suggestions for category or prizes? Mike

Jairo Totally agree with you to visually inspect other in the plane with you. I had situation where I 'rushed' to get on the load and did not route my chest strap properly. My buddy on the plane checked me over and gave me the OK and we were due to be first out and sitting at the rear of the plane. At about 11k a Keith Larret who was sitting at the front of the plane started shouting down to me. I thought he was just telling me to have a great dive or somat. So he ended up walking all the way down to me and stuck his finger under my chest strap and gave it a tug. It came clean away! The experience freaked me right out, but Keith took me to one side and gave me some words of comfort. Since then I never rush, always check my gear and get a gear check from a competent diver and if Im not happy with that I'll get another from someone else. On any ride to alttitude I not only check myself over, I visually inspect everyone elses gear. So far I've caught someone about to jump with their goggle round there neck and a guy on a ripcors with the toggle sticking out about 4 inches...it was about to deploy. As Springer would say, "Look after yourself AND each other" Mike

Just got into work

just the fact that we have done more for Europe than Europe has done for us. Quote Well where did you get the English language from then, or do ya'all think we speak Americanese Alrighty

A cowboy rides into town on Tuesday. He stays in town for 2 days and then leaves on Sunday. How did he do it?