CrazyThomas

Last time I checked, Vertigo only made a Dagger 244. Sizes are 222, 244, and 266. There may be one higher or lower than the two, but whatever. Mojo's come in 220, 240 and 260. Fox's come in 225, 245, and 265. Dagger's however, have the odd sizes :222, 244, and 266. But whatever, we're BASE jumpers, why pay attention to details. Bad karma then. Get out while you can. That, or learn to pack better. Thomas usually only does his "infamous" twistie tie pack jobs on spans. Twistie ties will open, but not with the best heading. Damn, I gotta go smoke another joint or something.

Thanks for the fixed link. must have been two many beers. I got half it right, the pics link still works for me. Thomas

here's video and pix of the jump... [URL http://chicagotv.feedroom.com/iframeset.jsp?ord=115951]video[/URL] [URL http://www.nbc5.com/slideshow/news/3755094/detail.html]pic slideshow[/URL] Thomas

which proves again why video of the jumps is so cool. After all, if you don't have video, it didn't happen. Wait until they start using video of jumps in a court of law to post-emptively arrest jumpers. Then, we can see how cool public videos of the jump are. Keep sending them to REAL TV, and to other cheap skate TV shows trying to get some publicity. Then, when the publicity bites you in the ass, well, hey, maybe video the arrest. That would be cool, have some arrest footage on you BASE video. BASE videos have their place, but not in the general public's hands. Nevermind me, it's just my paranoia again. Think of this. If a high school student video taped a hazing, would this (has this) ever been used in court? So why is BASE different. If you show blatant trespassing, don't be surprised to be called on it. What's the new one? Continuum II? Great, and how many people can identify the illegal objects being jumped? Wait, the cops are stupid, and could never figure out what building that was. The funny part......YOU provide them with the evidence needed to convict. Never mind me.....I'm just ranting. Thomas [shrugs, and walks back to bitterness corner]

Yeah. Wires are pretty hard (if not impossible) to see at night. Don't count on being able to see one, and avoid it. And hope you don't get stuck. Canopies will re-open, but will hardly ever untangle themselves. Or so I hear. Thomas

If it offended you, get out while you can. Stop jumping under the false premise that you will never either end up that way, or see someone else end up that way. Or even hear about a friend femuring in under his/her Extreme VX74. Why is it offensive? Because it is a harsh reality picture? Maybe because she sent it to you as a response? Question: Has your friend ever asked you what happens if both chutes malfunction? And you replied something smug like: "Well, I'll have the rest of my life to think about why." If so, you are as offensive as her, and don't realize it. To take the risks, you must be willing to pay the price. And don't assume you are smart enough or safe enough to never get hurt. Shit happens. Thomas please, someone step in and caveat my remarks....

From the original question: And from the following responses, I assumed we were talking about pu$$y, or area 52. I guess I read into the question by reading some of the responses. When's the last time you tried to insert into a perineum? And how well did that go? not sounding bitter though

ah yes, another SublimeDirectory fan. Thomas

I don't know what women call it, but here is what men can call it. vagina, pussy, bearded clam, vertical smile, beaver, cunt, trim, hair pie, bearded ax wound, tuna taco, fur burger, cooch, cooter, punani, snatch, twat, lovebox, box, poontang, cookie, fuckhole, love canal, flower, nana, pink taco, cat, catcher's mitt, muff, roast beef curtains, the cum dump, chocha, black hole, sperm sucker, fish sandwich, cock warmer, whisker biscuit, carpet, love hole, deep socket, cum craver, cock squeezer, slice of heaven, flesh cavern, the great divide, cherry, tongue depressor, clit slit, hatchet wound, honey pot, quim, meat massager, chacha, stinkhole, black hole of calcutta, cock socket, pink taco, bottomless pit, dead clam, cum crack, twat, rattlesnake canyon, bush, cunny, flaps, fuzz box, fuzzy wuzzy, gash, glory hole, grumble, man in the boat, mud flaps, mound, peach, pink, piss flaps, the fish flap, love rug, vadge, the furry cup, stench-trench, wizard's sleeve, DNA dumpster, tuna town, split dick, bikini bizkit, cock holster, cockpit, snooch, kitty kat, poody tat, grassy knoll, cold cut combo, Jewel box, rosebud, curly curtains, furry furnace, slop hole, velcro love triangle, nether lips, where Uncle's doodle goes, altar of love, cupid's cupboard, bird's nest, bucket, cock-chafer, love glove, serpent socket, spunk-pot, hairy doughnut, fun hatch, spasm chasm, red lane, stinky speedway, bacon hole, belly entrance, nookie, sugar basin, sweet briar, breakfast of champions, wookie, fish mitten, fuck pocket, hump hole, pink circle, silk igloo, scrambled eggs between the legs, black oak, Republic of Labia, juice box, Golden Palace, fetus flaps, skins, sausage wallet. Holiest of Holies, sugar hole, The Death of Adam, home plate, Deer Hoof, Golden Arches, Cats Paw, Mule Nose, Yo Yo Smuggler, Mumbler (Aussie), Dinner Roll, Crotch Waffle, Piss Fenders, crack, Melvin, Dove Breast, Brakepads, Vedgie, Slurpy, Vacuum Vulva, Pastrami Flaps, Hot Tamaki Walk, Buffalo Gums, Rooster Jaws, Wagon Ruts, Beaver Teeth, Mumble Pants (Sweden), Ninja Boot, Marcia (Aussie), Skin Canoe, Fatty, Mossy Jaw, The Big W, Chia Hole, Lip Jeans, Beetle Hood, Hungry Minge, Sausage Wallet, Front Bottom, Welly Top, Frum, Pancake Fold, Tongue Roll, Bologna Flap-Over, Furrogi (Poland), Fortune Nookie (China), Bearded Taco, Calamari Cockring, Displabia, Slot Pocket, Bluntfrunt, Fishamjig, Pole Magnet, Pocket Pie, Clamarama, kitty cage, Chicken's tongue, Conch shell, Crack of heaven, Dog's mouth, Door of life, Fly catcher, Fruit cup, Jelly roll, Lobster pot, bunny tuft, KNISH, her asshole neighbor, lotus, nappy dugout, moneymaker, womens weapon, tackle box, bone hider, red sea, pizzo, JIZZ RECEPTICLE, The Helmut Hide-A-Way, hairy heaven, furry 8 ball rack, crave cave, arbys with fur, fish canyon, toolshed, snake charmer, Furby, Enchilada of love, Ham sandwich, Camarillo brillo, Brazilian caterpillar, dick rack, boy in the canoe, flesh tuxedo, Mound of Venus, queef quarters, Venus butterfly, cooter, cream canal, poontang pie, wet mark, private area, thresher, punash, salami garage, tunnel of love, slurpee machine, pink cookie, penalty box, ground zero, meat crease, bait, birth canal, holy grail, pole hole, pork pie, fuzz bucket, one-eyed python trail, bubble gum by the bum, stink rink, theme park, saloon doors, pink truffle, bitter & twisted, burger bar, meat counter, temperamental ringpiece, python syphon, big bud, the Wombsday Book, the condo downstate, snake lake, the indoor barbecue, pound cake, beef tomato, tickled pink, launch pad, horn of plenty, the indoor picnic, hamper of goodies, flapped bap, bonefish, close encounter with the turd kind, sperm bank, man's charity bash, bush tucker, midnight dip, the one-door vulva, the welcome opponent, the Twatlantic Ocean, temporary lodgings, field of dreams, bean, cooze, old catchers mitt, devil's hole, lucy, pish buffet, pooswaa, poonaner, davey jones locker, pink panther, tinker bell, south mouth, dick eater, wonder bread, wolly bolly, foxhole, hot pocket, head catcher, Lawrence of A Labia, silk funnel, dick driver, purple people penis eater, meat curtains, ponchita, cherry pop tart, fat rabbit, scunt, pee jaws, mingus, The Notorious V.A.G., stench trench, poon jab, nappy dugout, babyoven, penis parking, cooter muffin, the promised land, cock pocket, cha cha, the shrine, bitch ditch, fury pink mink, mammal hole, ever-lasting cum stopper, the toothless blow job, happy flappy, wilt chamberlian's daily glove, the code defierthe salt water taffy factory, mommy's pie, the easy bake oven, the deflower patch, the virginator, the schlong sucker, the dea bone patch, the vegitarian's temptation, the vegan store, the blow hole, the pump protector, bag pipe, Spitball Bullseye, meat wagon, pickle stinker, jezebel's smell, yoni, willys haven, scrumpter, peach, sweat box, yeast pocket, penis warmer, tampon tunnel, penis pothole, cucumber canal, egg drop Box, sperm shack, dick dungeon, cock curator, b.o.b.'s bungalow, mommy parts, tuna pot pie, nice slice, peter vise, cock sock, rack of clam, peters grove, penis purse, grandest canyon, fish dish, banana box, tuna spread, pink portal, count fapula, red river gorge, happy valley, revolving in/out door, baby zipper, richards house, stop-n-pop, bone polisher, packin shack, weiner wrap, clap trap, camel toe, dildo hotel, axe gash, pearl hotel, sea food six pack, clam canal, coose canal, dick deposit, wand waxer, vidgie, erie canal, candy kiss, gauntlet, round mound of beehound,lick n' stick, lap flounder, tomahawk chop, chin-chin, pachinko, cuntry pie, lip tip, the big casino, one eyed worm hole, amazon forest, cock cave, fuck donut, coochie pop, babby, wet seal, pissy froth hole, bald biscuit, the unmentionable, mans ruin, peeshie, hairy potter, courtney cocksleve, panty hamster,deep pink, jaws of life, gizmo, faith, cock magnet, slippery slide, Meat tunnel, pink heaven, squid, dick basket, hot spot, poochika, pudding, bowl, love cave, squeeze-box, quim, honey pot, the bone collector, goodie basket, depository, pink turtleneck, bread-box, little debbie, pole hole, pandora's box,snail tracker, cuntzilla, homebase, pud pocket, bear trap, indian bones and the temple of poon, chanch, big montana, noochie, choot, golden valley, nappy roots, dick mitten, mystical fold just to name a few.

Will someone please tell me what's wrong with my joke? Why the ?? You forgot a part. I heard it with flies, but ants work also. Q: How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 2. The real trick is getting them in there. Thomas

I gotta straighten you out on this one. You have two jokes spliced together. First is: Q: How many GAY guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Just one, but it takes the entire emergency-room staff to get it back out again! Q: How many Perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: (in a panting voice) It depends. What are you wearing? Is it something sexy? Or at least that's the way I read them before. Another gay variation is Q: How many gay guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 4. 1 to screw in an art decco bulb, and three to stand around saying "OOOOOHHHHH, that's FABULOUS!" Thomas

Already been told, but here's another classic. How many Floridians does it take to change a light bulb? Noone knows. They're still counting. Thomas

OK, let's focus on that problem then. How to get the rope up there. The silence part is a trick. Maybe approach it from the other direction. If the neighbors only are concerned about unknown noise, let them know why and when they might hear some noise. Then, if noise is no longer a problem, throwing becomes an option. Honestly, I don't think throwing a rope would be too much louder than a slider off opening. Even if you had to try throwing it 4 or 5 times, it still is not the big WHACK of an opening. Or, use a cover up. Two ways. First, wait til it is really windy, and then get the rope set up. The wind will howl, and cover up the noise. This is assuming you can safely leave the rope there a few days. If the site is active with people, this option is out. OR.....have someone with a REALLY loud stereo system in their car turn it up, open the windows, and take a slow drive through the area of concern. The nieghbors will be hearing the loud stereo, and not the clink clink of metal on metal if using a carabiner to throw up a rope. Problem with this method is a nuisance to the neighbors. I'm about out of ideas on this one. Good luck with it Faber. Thomas

Well, if silence is something you are after, you could always drop a load of cash, and get some magnetic grippers. If the chimney is ferrous metal, magnetic grippers should work. Of course, we are talking a fair amount of money for the grippers. It was rumored that someone once used suction cups to ascend a fairly tricky structure. Of course the day blaze jump got XXX busted. But then again, XXX wasn't much for object burning concern. Suction cups may be easier to find and use then magnetic ascenders. Either way, you will need some additional training and funding to aquire the skills needed to perform either maneuver safely, and with some amount of proficiency. Otherwise, bring 5-6 of your buddies out with you, and have them stack a chinese tower up for you. One person on top of another person's shoulders, and so on and so forth. Then, the top person can quietly attach the rope to use. The would be quieter than throwing the rope up. Then again, a human ladder may not be the easiest to build to 5m. Just other options, no matter how expensive or ridiculous they may sound . Thomas

Sounds like a Prussik knot. How to Tie a Prussik knot Did he have to keep sliding the knot up along the climbing rope? If so, it was most likely a prussik knot. They are not the quickest thing to use, but they will get you up a rope. A question I have thought about it: Would it be possible for a person to use this technique to ascend their own parachute lines? Scenario. Jumping all alone, and land in a tree, about 40 feet up, hanging by only one branch, with nothing to grab. The canopy is firmly wrapped around the branch. Possible theory. Rig up a prussik knot with some rope (if planned ahead, and jumped with a little piece of rope), and climb up the suspension lines until you reach the branch. And if you have forgotten to bring along a little piece of rope, maybe shoelaces would work. edit : add link to the knot page Thomas

Well, the cop wanted to report 4.394274 seconds, but didn't take the time to write all them extra digits down. Yeah. It's just that......it was a COP who said he timed him. And COPS are cool. So the COP must be right. Of course, the COP might have been quick with the stopwatch, and it only took said cyclist 4 seconds. That would mean his speed was more like 225mph!! Even faster

did you catch this part too, Ivan? Jan 27, 2003????? some of us don't remember shit all that well. oh shit, hold on, let me search and see if someone else said that before also. Yep, I guess THAT has been talked about also. Thomas

what about the "Burn-out" factor. Seriously, if you jumped 20 times daily, for a month straight, would the last jump be as exciting as the first? if time and money were no object, then no object would be safe Thomas

I have no idea how he bypassed security (other than climbing the fence), but I am assuming the fanny pack was part of his tool kit to help him put up his banner. I wonder who next week's super hero will be? Thomas

BATMAN Someone must have shined the Bat light up above the palace. I heard Spiderman made an appearance a week ago also. I'm curious as to where Wonder Woman will show up. Thomas

geez, and here I thought I was gonna read about either your computer not allowing porn downloads anymore, or a PILOT CHUTE malfunction. PC? yeah, well they have to keep busy with the whole PC scene. I'm sure law enforcement would really hate to do anything productive, like keep BATMAN off of Buckingham Palace . That PC stuff sounds worse than over here. Happy healing, Thomas

something to be careful about. bottling up too many feeling causes postal worker type reactions. I used to try to bottle up my feelings or reactions, and generally it is not a good thing. I snap and find myself in an undesirable position (read: 4 point restraints at the psych ward), or worse. Venting is a good thing, and like all things, best done in moderation.

um....a nearby bartender. or friends. Or someone nice on AIM

And what do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef! Thomas

hang from the strut, and with the pilot watching, do a motion like you are going to release. Then just release one hand, and hang on with the other like that hand is cramped up and stuck on the strut. Naturally, the other hand should be out from the shoulders already, completing half a boxman position. Look at your hand, then at the pilot and give him a "what the fuck" look. Then, start banging on your hand with your released hand, and finally let go after you have fucked with the pilot enough. Don't bang your altimeter up doing this. Also, don't go too long on the spot, or else be prepared to dump high. And make sure you can HOLD ON with one hand. Thomas