TheBile

I'd take Toggles back if I were you. His head is blurred. Seriously though, you got a cute dog there.

Suicide, followed by cremation and having my ashes sprinkled out in the carribean sea. The only thing that's stopping me is obtaining a gun. Very difficult to do here in the UK as opposed to the US. I've thought of other methods but they all involve the chance of surviving and being in extreme agony for an extended period which I would prefer to avoid. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Two bottles of Fosters Ice is all it takes for ugly women to look attractive to me. Slightly more for me to look attractive to women I would imagine. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Did his plan of disSEAT get him through ? (OK, I know that's bad but it's a Monday morning. ) Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Thanks for all the good advice folks. Bring on the summer. Don't be a don't be, be a do be. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

How's it going chief. Aintcha too fat to jump ? Seriously, welcome to the madhouse.

Welcome to the pit of post whores. Stay here long enough and you'll become one too. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Even if he is English.... Seriously, welcome Fraser. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Swoop your arms in Level 2 like there's no tomorrow. It feels great. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Oldie but Goodie. I posted this one back in September. Cool avatar by the way. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Ok, here we go. I'm going back to continue my AFF next summer (7 months) but there are a few things playing on my mind which I need to resolve during that time. I've been reading these posts since I joined DZ.com and they have been extremely helpful, but I thought I would have a little rant about my specifics to see if you could offer any help, advice, wisdom, kick up the arse etc. Background : I've failed AFF Level 3 twice. The last time my JM had to grab my right arm close to the hard deck (after a seriously unstable fall) to stop me from backsliding further away from him and therefore pulled my chute for me. My JM was tempted to move me onto Level 4 even though I felt I wasn't ready for that. It's become irrelevant now because the shite weather roled in and I haven't jumped since. Problem : Basically I'm having trouble with my arch and falling stable. Most of the other concerns I have will go once I nail this because I will feel that once I can achieve stability then it will give me the confidence to move on to the other stuff. My difficulty is that my body doesn't seem to have the flexibility that's needed. I know my knees need to be level with my shoulders in the arch but I really have to strain to get them there. Because of this strain I can't relax. If I do relax, the knees drop, I backslide and potato chips become my new friend. Also my mind seems to have no idea where my legs are. I've tried the Toe-Tapping but it didn't seem to help In my mind they feel like they are level but in actual fact the knees are down towards my chest. My JM says that I just need to develop the muscle memory to solve this. The other problem I have is that as soon as I realise that the second JM has released me I tend to think, "Shit ! I'm on my own. Don't panic. Don't screw up" and tense up. I almost feel like any kind of twitch on my part will throw me onto my back or into a flat spin or something This tenseness causes my knees to drop. I try to relax but, as mentioned earlier, this also causes my knees to drop. I know that if I get this sorted I will be much happier up there and will be able to progress. Hope you can help. Cheers in advance. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Now these are menu systems I could use. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

LMAO at the photo entitled 'Kicking a Watermelon'. What kind of photographer wakes up in the morning thinking, "Hmmm. What shall I photograph today. I know, I'll shoot a guy kicking a watermelon." WTF ?!? Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Then again it could be because you flashed your boobies at them. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Don't forget to watch Attack of the Clones too. I guess they must have taught the perfect arch in Jedi Training School, eh. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Dear Kids, I am very happy in the new residence you have put me in. This week we actually got to go outside for an hour. I haven't been feeling very good this week. The friend I shared a room with died yesterday. I am coping pretty well with my sorrows. It's been six months since you visited me last, I guess you're all pretty busy. It's OK, I've learned to use the internet to pass the time and this computer in the rec room has a pretty decent web-cam So you can remember what I look like, I have attached a recent picture of myself. You all take care and write to me soon. With all my heart. Love Grandma

They were alone in the house. It was a cold, dark and stormy night. The storm had come up quickly and each time the thunder boomed he watched her jump. She looked across the room and admired his strong appearance and wished that he would take her in his arm, comfort her, protect her from the storm, she wanted that.... Then the power went out. She screamed. He raced to the sofa where she was cowering. He did not hesitate to pull her into his arms. He knew this was a forbidden union and expected her to pull back. He was surprised when she didn't resist but instead clung to him. The storm raged on...as did their growing passion and there came a moment when each knew that they had to be together. They knew it was wrong, their families would not understand, but.... So consumed in their passion they didn't hear the door or the click of the light switch ... the power was back on........ See Piccie. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

No Fucking ?!?! How the hell are you supposed to get a guy with that in your......................oh, wait, hang on. No Faking. Sorry. I misread it. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Glad to see in this electronic age that snail-mail still works across the miles.

Our firewall in work won't allow me to view her as it filters the category "Personals/Dating". But what the hell, count me in. I'll take a chance. I'm a Gerbil. I'm used to bars. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

As soon as they cry for the first time they begin to manipulate. They learn instinctively that the louder they cry the more urgent attention you give them, and so adjust their decible level accordingly. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

ROFLMAO Gay Gasper. Please tell me that's a joke. If it isn't send me a few copies would ya. I'll wrap em up and send them on. My mates would piss themselves laughing opening those up on Christmas Morn. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

The commercial side of Christmas is beginning to piss me off. I remember the day when I could have my birthday mid October without so much as a hint that Christmas was coming. Now I can't move for all the Christmas advertising, decorations and stuff. Then we have to put up with it for a whole two and a half months before the event. Bah Humbug ! Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Not yet, but it's only a matter of time. Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !

Why would you want to ruin the moment by singing ? Gerb I stir feelings in others they themselves don't understand. KA'CHOW !