Cornholio

dude, real men don't need snorkels. step aside, son. Let me show you how it's done. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

Damn it! A penis is not a bad thing!!!!!! Penis ?? Did someone say they wanted a Penis ? I have one !! But it's for girls only. BTFU guys. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

I know what's going on! LAST ONE TO POST GETS THE THREAD LOCKED!! . Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

Ladies, ladies!! Cornholio comes and sits down on the couch next to a lady and scoots freeflyz off the couch Now where were we ?? . Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

hmmm... door-to-door crackheads huh ?? Do they make more money than standing on the median ?? . Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

I think the T-shirt alone is pretty damn cool!! Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

TWO hot chicks... Ok, I'm leaving now. . Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

I did. Ok.... DOGPILE ON QUADE!!!! Really, it's just better knowing than wondering why it vanished. Thanks for telling your side of it. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

so.. um.. WHO deleted it ?? I'd really like to know so we can learn from it . Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

What is really amazing is that before 1994, this was only a misdemeanor, and then it became a felony. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

At the rate you're posting, that should happen later today.

DITTO!! Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

awww! Sorry Katie! Now WHERE were you ?!?! I'll try and wait for you for my 2000th, ok ?? Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

Happy Birthday Lizzie!!! I wish I could be there to touch your ass, I mean spank you!! Have a good time and have one for me! Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

OKAY!!! {{{{SMOOOCH!!!!}}}} You got it!!! Thanks for all who made this possible. I would like to thank my boss for not looking over my shoulder, my parents for raising such an educated and literate son, my dz.com friends for cheering me on, and most importantly.... Thanks Sangiro for an excellent site to help educate me and allowing me to meet so many cool people and to help share your bandwidth !! I think I'm gonna cry... Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

My elbow is still aching a bit, but I think I might be able to fly this Sunday... Thanks for asking!! that's 2 left to go right ?? .... Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

oooh ooooh!! Almost!!! 2... Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

well, it's quite nice here in North Carolina.. About 88 and mostly cloudy.. 3... Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5 year old son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son saying, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now... cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train cause we're going down the tracks" The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now, I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train... but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say... "All passengers, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She heard her little darling continue... "for those of you just boarding, remember there is no smoking in the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen..." 4... Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

Somebody just asked me if I was going for my 1000th post. Honest to God, I didn't even realize it. But.... Since he brought it up... 5 more to go..... Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

You be the judge http://www.henry.martinez.net/misc/femaleorshemale.htm It's work safe. 15 out of 16 correct. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

Look!!! SHINY THINGS!!! Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

LOL Nah, wasn't me, but I read it and busted out laughing so I'd thought I'd share. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

Ok, last one... an oldy, but perfect for this forum (name was changed to protect the innocent) Clay buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant,and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. Clay doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. Clay hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted. Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. "Try again." he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks Pam to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn." Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump

I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. And, I never figured out why men think with their head and women think with their heart. And I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do." One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT??????" So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dreads. She explains that I must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a Woman. I'm thinking "What was her first clue?". I finally realize that nothing was going to happen that night, so I went to sleep. The very next day, we went shopping at a big, unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on three different very expensive outfits. She could not decide which one to take so I told her to take all three of them. She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200.00 a pair to which I say OK. And then we go to the jewelry dept. where she gets a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you........ she was so excited. She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she cared. I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet because she does not even play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK. She was almost sexually excited from all of this and you should have seen her face when she said "I'm ready to go to the cash register." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No, honey I don't feel like buying all this! stuff now." You should have seen her face ....... it went completely blank. I then said "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a Man." I figure that I won't be having sex again until sometime after the spring of 2008. Butthead: Whoa! Burritos for breakfast! Beavis: Yeah! Yeah! Cool! bellyflier on the dz.com hybrid record jump