ScottishJohn

Thats why we all call her "Stinky Jo" ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

I think there are 4 statues of lions at trafalgar square. ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

Your at the fountain at trafalgar square ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

That was a clue ? ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

Your under your desk ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

It's still for sale if you are interested ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

see attachment ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

Nooooo, You can't do this to us. Tell us the freakin answer. ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

clothes ? ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

Cheeky cow ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

At least I have a pint of Tenants lager to help keep me cool while I check the rock pools for 3 eyed fish. ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

Lego me at the beach.....

Ah, the first bottle got lost. Here's another one ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

Here's a bottle of Stella for ya, don't tell anyone. ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

I had an opening last summer that sniveled for 1100 ft. Even got accused of low opening because everyone else was under canopy and I was still passing them with a slightly open canopy above my head. It fully opened @ 1800, and it was a Fury 220 ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

LOL .. Make him buy his own beer ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

where the fuck is the airfield, (do a 180 turn) where the fuck is the airfield. ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

> What should I be doing to/for it? Drink lots of beer

A dodge Viper would be nice. Vrooom Vrooom ================================= I can smell your brains ! =================================

I'm really ok to work with (as long as I ignore the voices) I't's not my fault that everyone winds me up

> Let's say a few co-workers who pissed me off took a couple days off > do to severe craps and diahrea... You are soooo bad. I must remember that one

I've thought of another one. Back at IBM again onother guy comes up and give the afore mentioned PFY on the label machine some verbal abuse about something. Now this young guy is our PFY and he is part of our team so if he needs some verbal he should get it from us. Anyway, I find out where "The Whinger" is working and dicover that he is on a short term contract to do a specific task and that the contract keeps getting extended because the engieers haven't found a better way to automate this mundane task. I go back to may locker put on a nice tie , change my usual grubby white coat for a sparkling new one, grab a clip board and pen and head off to sort this arse hole out. I get down to this guy and introduce myself as a "Time and Motion" manager and that he is to ignore me and just carry on with his work. I stand there for about 30 min doing a very good job of writing things down on my clip board , looking at my watch , shaking my head and sucking in air through my teath (known as a teeth drier). This guy is now worried, he can see the end of the contract in coming up and is working twice as fast (and sweating quite a bit) to try and impress me as I time every move he makes and write it down. I then start with the stupid questions, Why are you doing that , how many of these do you do in a day, why don't you do it like that etc, and all the time the PFY and my team mates are sitting in the tea room across from us pissing there pants with laughter as this guy tries to explain to me how important his job is. It was very funny but you really had to be there to appreciate it.

I used to work for IBM in Greenock years ago on the production line making mother boards for pc's and after the process that I was involved inwe had to print off barcode lables and stick then on each card before they were sent away for testing etc. Anyway, we got this new guy starting with us and we put him on the lable machine because it was even more boring than the rest of the job but this arse hole came upto him and started to give the poor guy grief about the lables on the boards because his bar code scanner wouldn't scan them and he had to type the numbers in by hand. The boards used to take about a 24 hours to reach "The Moaner" after we had finished with them so that night specially for "The Moaner" I setup the lable printer to cut the last bar off every lable that was printed that night. And every time he came back to moan we done the same thing again. Eventually he must have got the message because he never came back. Oh Happy Days

I used to work for this ass hole who was in charge of making new developments to our numerical model. Anyway , the output from this model used to be printed off on about 300 pieces of microfiche every day and I had to hand sort the micro fiche and pull out a couple that he was interested in then file the rest away. If the fiche he wanted wasn't there then he would ask me to go down stairs (3 floors down) and check to see if it was printed off. He would come in every 15 mins and ask me to go down and check until it arrived. Well I got pretty pissed off with this after a while then I got promoted and changed jobs and moved to one of our smaller buildings in the area. But for a few weeks after changing jobs I would get up nice and early go into the main building go down to the computer room search through all the micro fiche that belonged to him find this one piece of fiche that was so important to him then put it in my pocket, walk out and go to my own building. Unfortunately I wasn't there to see the look on his face as he had to keep going down to look for this missing bit of fiche but I still got a certain amount of satisfaction out of it.