npgraphicdesign

No it's not it was 02/01/10 Damned foriegners; who can't get the date format correct Blah blah blah. And that's not a palindrome either.

Hey have you seen the new Chipmunks movie yet?

01022010. Funky

...Rabbi, can I jump out of a plane with a parachute during Shabat? Rabbit says "You can jump out, but you can't pull the 'chute." Post other skydiving (or non skydiving) jokes...need zee laughs!

I want to go skiing in Europe on the same slopes. Of course, I'd prefer that noone chases & shoots at me while I'm skiing. So what other good chase scenes (skiing or not) come to mind?

When go to Switzerland next winter for skiing, I'm gonna show you what we hairy Russians do to people for comments like these

you guys give worse love advice then Jerry Springer Shah!! Where are you??

Did you just describe my last g/f or what?

I don't think it's a matter of 'does it work for us guys.' It's a matter of being brought up that way, and that's how my family raised me in Russia. So, I do it regardless. So no, chivalry is not dead. But some people are slowly killing it

Dear Dr. Shah, I seem to have a problem. I met the perfect woman 10 years ago and cannot get over her. Have not been able to meet anyone quite like her, and cannot get her out of my head. What do you recommend? Sincerely, npgraphicdesign (psst...I have popcorn in the microwave if anyone else wants some...)

So what? As long as they're not trying to convert you (and vice versa), you should be fine. I had several such relationships in past. And if she tries, and she's hot, you can pretend for a while you'll convert, and then dump her when you got bored :) Excuse me, do adult people still consult with their family whether they should date someone? I thought it ended up like 40 years ago! that's the point...she DID try to convert me ;) besides this happened 10 years ago. I was not a adult back then, and don't you dare imply otherwise! I'm now 30 ...

Thanks Marg. I had a situation where my first (and only true love so far) was Muslim. I am Jewish. Didn't plan for it, didn't sit there and try to find a Muslim significan other, it just...happened. Head over heels in love, haven't found anyone like her since then...anyways, we talked about possible marriage. I know religion/spirituality was important to her, and I was willing to accept that. However, when she asked me if I'd convert to Islam so that the marriage could be accepted by her country (Morocco) I said hell no. I know there were other reasons behind it as well..such as her family not being tolerant of marrying anyone who's not Muslim, etc etc etc. I know that Islam/Judaism is a very exterme combination, moreso than any other religions out there...and I'm wondering if anyone else had a similar situation, not just with those two religions, but others as well.

Oh come on. Some beliefs/practices just deserve ridicule. Such as....(prepares for a ridiculous response)

So asking the other person to convert to Islam would indicate that they're not respecting your religion/beliefs? ps. you'd only expect her to respect positions, not traditions.

Let's say you are dating/fall in love with someone from an opposing religion (say Muslim/Jewish for example.) Or let's say your family is very openly against the religion of someone you're dating, to the point where continuing to date that person would cause a rift between you and your family? How would you handle that? PS. This isn't about me currently, but I have been in a similar situation in the past, and it ended for reasons other than religion. PPS. Shah, sheddap.

Christmas Cookie Recipe 1 cup of water 1 tsp. baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp. salt 1 cup of brown sugar Lemon juice 4 large eggs 1 cup nuts 2 cups of dried fruit 1 bottle Jose Cuervo Gold Tequila Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour one level cup and drink. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK. Try another cup...just in case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet. Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher. CHERRY MISTMAS

I want $100 million dollars/year, a few houses here n there, a supermodel wife, and the admiration of millions of fans wordlwide. Or I could wish to be Tiger Woods. In reality, I want my mom/grandma to be happy and healthy. For me, all I want is a good job in my field for next year.

I was laughing for about 5 minutes because of the expressions on this poor dogs face. Caption: "I know I had my balls chopped off, but I didn't think it would be that bad."

OK, THAT had us Rolling!!!!! Wow...

I fear I would come up short. in more ways than one

http://npgraphicdesign.com/tw.jpg

Hah!!!

Poor Shah. Even when he's trying to get into the holiday spirit he gets blasted by everyone...

*Yawn* When does the funny part begin?

I can..but not at the same time....at least not yet.