Jessica

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Everything posted by Jessica

  1. Jessica

    Occupations

    Yes. When my mom told me that I could be anything I wanted when I grew up, she lied. Skydiving is for cool people only
  2. Jessica

    Occupations

    Me too. Skydiving is for cool people only
  3. Oh God, that was the best bathroom grafitti EVER. It was in my favorite college bar. In the men's room. So I never saw it (and if I did I was waaaay too drunk to remember) but I was told about it often. It said: "No matter how good she looks, someone, somewhere, is sick of her shit." I think it was right under: "Never trust anything that bleeds for five days and lives." Skydiving is for cool people only
  4. If my family members sued (which they wouldn't) I would haunt them!! Skydiving is for cool people only
  5. Sangiro, as well as the Bytch and the other dz.com moderators. This place is my post-beer-light bonfire. Everyone in Tent 4 at Rantoul. Mandy and Ernie, fulltime instructors at Skydive Dallas. Allen, S&TA at Skydive San Marcos. Eric aka PhreeZone. Tons of others.
  6. It's all chronicled on rec. Let's see if this link works: groups.google.com/groups?hl=en&lr=lang_en&ie=UTF-8&threadm=d762fc7a.0208041005.2fb941f6%40posting.google.com&rnum=1&prev=/groups%3Fq%3Drantoul%2Bhelicopter%2Bgroup:rec.skydiving%26hl%3Den%26lr%3Dlang_en%26ie%3DUTF-8%26selm%3Dd762fc7a.0208041005.2fb941f6%2540posting.google.com%26rnum%3D1 Skydiving is for cool people only
  7. Quit celebratin' and send me my pictures! Skydiving is for cool people only
  8. Reading comprehension wasn't where you scored the highest, was it? Skydiving is for cool people only
  9. That sounds ambitious. How well do I know this person? In the biblical sense? Skydiving is for cool people only
  10. Me either. That's why my keyboard remains whole. Skydiving is for cool people only
  11. I have to stop reading this thread or I'm going to throw my keyboard across the room and go buy an RV. Skydiving is for cool people only
  12. Yes, my eyes don't have that haunted look yet. Lemme see if I can get that day off. Skydiving is for cool people only
  13. I wanna help y'all get in trouble, then pretend I have no idea who you are when the cops get there.... Skydiving is for cool people only
  14. Oh my God. Whatever. Notice the "ladies" haven't bothered to chime in. It's because we're annoyed by all this cockiness. Skydiving is for cool people only
  15. ...because I have a small parrot climbing up the inside of the leg of my pants, biting my calf. Skydiving is for cool people only
  16. Jessica

    Bushism

    Every time I hear that phrase, I think of Christopher Walken as "The Continental" on Saturday Night Life. "Fool me waaance, sham on yew. Fool me twaaaace, sham on ME." Skydiving is for cool people only
  17. Hey, no, he helps me keep my skills sharp. You know, for when I run into people who actually have wit. Skydiving is for cool people only
  18. Ugh. I don't find that funny in the slightest. Skydiving is for cool people only
  19. La la la.... Skydiving is for cool people only
  20. OK, I'll play. >A steering line broke at 200 ft? Steer and flare with rear risers. >Your altimeter was hit and knocked off on exit? Keep an eye on someone else in the group's altimeter, eyeball the ground. >You lose sight of the formation in a cloud and you >are at break off altitude? Turn 180 and track, hope like hell everyone else did the same, wave off like a biatch before dumping at the altitude you said you would. >You experience a hard opening, dislocating a >shoulder, rendering one arm useless? Steer one side at a time, flare pulling both toggles in one hand. >After opening you look up and your main was >packed w/ a step-through? See if I can control it. If I can't, chop it. >In free-fall, your shirt flys up, covering your cut >away and reserve handles? Ugh. Try to pull it down. If I didn't notice it until I had to go to one or both of my handles in a high-speed malfunction, and I couldn't pull it down, I'd grab them from over my shirt and give a mighty heave. >Your helmet comes un-latched in free-fall? The visor? Blink a lot, or try to slam it closed. No big thing. >Your full face helmet visor fogs up in free-fall, or >under canopy? This is why I wear a flipup. If it weren't a flipup, and I were high enough under canopy, I'd take it off and clip it to my chest strap. If I were low, I'd try to ditch it. >You look across a formation and notice that >someone’s main pin has come out of the closing >loop? Try to point it out to them. Maybe AFF "pull" signal. Get the hell away from them. >After all of the floaters have climbed out (Twin >Otter/King Air jump ship), you are sitting up near >the pilot, and the pilot yells for an abort/go-around >for traffic? Scream and yell. >In free-fall w/ other jumpers you look down and >see an open canopy directly underneath the >group/formation? Ew!!!!! Wave off wildly, I guess, as I'm immediately tracking off? >In light and variable winds, you watch four other >jumpers land before you in four different >directions? Make mental note to ask them WTF, and follow the last jumper's pattern, if it's safe to do so. >You accidentally land in water, too deep to reach >the bottom, 200 feet from the nearest shore? Take off the chest strap, dive deep, get away from the canopy and lines, use the container as a raft, and kick toward shore. >You land in a tree, suspended 20 feet from the >ground? Cuss and wait for help. >Your reserve pilot chute launches just after your >main opens? Get ready to deal with a two-out situation. Bleah. Some of those are nasty. Skydiving is for cool people only
  21. I dunno, but Packin' Cathy told me at WFFC (she imparted a lot of advice on me as she tighted my Reflex poptop) that ZP on reserves was EVIL because "ZP fails on the creases, while F-111 only fails on the seams." At least I think that's what she said. I didn't have my notebook with me. Can anyone elaborate? Skydiving is for cool people only
  22. Very cool, thanks guys. I'll cancel the personal trainer. I probably won't beat up the rigger in question because he's going to let me come hang out and stare at him while he works. Skydiving is for cool people only
  23. Ugh. Get well soon, Anne! Skydiving is for cool people only
  24. I spent it in the local gay bar getting very, very drunk. It was a cool bar -- very underground. The kind of place you pointed at as you drove past it when you were in high school and said as if you were imparting a high-level secret, "I hear that place is a gay bar." I've always had a lot of gay friends. That's why I don't understand why WildBlue and I don't get along better. Skydiving is for cool people only
  25. ooh, e.e. cummings.... i like my body when it is with your body. It is so quite a new thing. Muscles better and nerves more. i like your body. i like what it does, i like its hows. i like to feel the spine of your body and its bones, and the trembling -firm-smooth ness and which i will again and again and again kiss, i like kissing this and that of you, i like, slowly stroking the, shocking fuzz of your electric fur, and what-is-it comes over parting flesh . . . . And eyes big love-crumbs, and possibly i like the thrill of under me you quite so new Skydiving is for cool people only