Nataly

So a thread on here inspired me to write about my experience so far with a dating site.. I'm not going to apologise or feel ashamed: I did it - I joined a dating site. It's Match.com in fact.. I thought: why dick around? It's the most popular one - it must be for a reason (probably advertising, but I digress).. So I post a variety of pics of myself. I even threw in the odd one where I'm not looking very cute at all, in an effort to show my "goofy" side.. What do I think so far?? Well, it all seems like a monumental waste of time.. My profile has been looked at over 2000 times since I joined 3 (?) weeks ago (possibly 4). I've been "winked" at on average a dozen times per day on weekdays and about 3 times that on weekends.. I've gotten a number of requests - many of which I would never entertain sharing with anyone and which caused me to promptly block a number of users. I have blocked over 100 rude/weird/scary candidates so far.. In short, I can't keep up. I don't think I'm attracting the right kind of people, and I don't think I'm looking at the right kinds of things either.. The most ironic thing is that on paper, I'm instinctively selecting all the obvious stuff that actually matters NOT AT ALL if the personality is crap (like salary, of all things!! What a fucking hypocrite that makes me, right?!). Of course no one fantasises about falling in love with a man who's short/fat/broke, but the reality is that if he's bloody Prince Charming, who gives a fuck about any of that trivial shit??! The difficulty is that I have NO IDEA how to read through all the crap to find appealing personalities.. I'm thinking this online thing is actually *more* tedious and *more* difficult to figure out than actually going out and meeting people.. Trouble is.. I don't like going out and meeting people.. It's bloody hard to read people from some little written profile.. Even I come off sounding like a totally different person, no matter how "true to myself" I try to be.. *sigh*.. What a funny world.. Honestly.. If one more man asks me for random sex I'm going to scream.. I mean.. It's so unoriginal! Any one else out there struggling with "virtual dating"??? "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

OMG - that's awful.. What's even worse is that there are plenty of people who would go to just any monkey, not ask any questions and get a piercing or tattoo.. Scary.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Wow.. I just crawled out of bed and couldn't believe people were still posting to this thread!! Thanks for the well-wishes everyone.. I feel *almost* ok now.. This morning I was convinced I'd be fine for work, until I woke up with my forehead covered in soggy cheerios Yes.. I fell asleep in my cereal bowl.. hmm.. I'm kind of borderline on vaccinations.. I think on an individual basis there is strong evidence that it works.. Unfortunately, there is also strong evidence that we are creating "super-bugs" by making diseases stronger and stronger.. So.. I don't know.. All I know is I felt like it was worth a shot (cheezy pun intended!).. But Holy Crap.. I'm NOT getting it again. I don't care AT ALL whether my illness was related or not - I felt fucking terrible. I still feel a bit off, but still better. I'm NOT going to take notes and try again next year - no way!! I'll take my chances like I have every other year of my life, thank-you-very-much.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

mmm chicken soup.. If only the kitchen weren't so far away.. feel like death.. need more sleep.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Oh. My. God. I think this is what dying must feel like.. On Thursday I got the flu jab at work.. I was warned that I may experience "flu-like symptoms".. Fuck that - I have the flu. I read the documentation beforehand and it said "The flu jab doesn’t cause flu as it doesn’t contain any of the virus. However, you may experience side effects after having the jab. Some people experience a slight temperature and aching muscles for a couple of days afterwards. Your arm may feel a bit sore at the site where you were injected. More severe reactions are rare." Here's how I feel: -fever -chills -dizziness -coughing -sneezing -runny nose -severe headache -nausea -fatigue -phlegm And I feel achy all over It's taken all my energy to get out of bed for the second time today just to type a few responses on this.. And now I think I will drink some water and go back to bed.. Soo.. Tired.. I want my mommy... "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

I've travelled loads with my rig and the biggest problems I had were all in the States!! The thing is that a lot of it depends on the person (or people) you happen to be dealing with on the day, and not so much the nationality in question.. I travelled shortly after all the liquid bomb scares from Heathrow in London.. The security guy looked at my rig and asked me one question: do you have an explosive charge in there? I showed him my AAD documentation which explains how the device works and what it should look like on the scan and he wasn't interested.. As far as he was concerned, I brought the card with me so he had no reason to trust what it said. He called his boss, who had experience of dealing with rigs. The guy said it was fine and off I went. As for problems in the States, I've been delayed almost every time I've travelled to the US (or indeed within the US) when carrying my rig. The most common thing people seem to be worried about is "why would you have a parachute in the first place?" Like I'd somehow do something dodgy and try to escape the plane!! Sounds ridiculous to you and me, but to Joe Smith who's getting $5 per hour and just doing his job, it's a serious concern.. Best advice I can give: before I travel I always print off whatever policy the airline has on personal parachutes.. They usually don't dispute their own documentation/policies. And whatever you do, be polite, co-operative and calm. Be prepared to check it in at the end of the day.. You're travelling on *their* plane - they make the rules. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

I'm amazed - who knew it could be done?!! AWESOME! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

My guess is it was too dark for pics.. But if I'm wrong, I think you have a valid point: WHERE ARE THE PICS??!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

My friend never laughed so much in his life (according to him) as the day I told him about not being able to find Lester square in London.. Probably because it's actually *spelled* Leicester!!! Really threw me at the time!! Ahh.. That brings me back!!!! I also foolishly used the word fanny-bag.. I saw some pretty horrified faces when I said it.. Fanny over here isn't a cutesy word for "bum", but a relatively rude word for women's bits.. hmm.. Anyway, the main thing is that even though many of us don't *understand* Shroppy, at least we know he's ok!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Really? As in "I put it in the bin" (or "what did you do with that last piece of cake.." "I binned it - it smelled foul")? Or only in relation to "crashing"? I've never heard Americans use "bin" for trash-can.. And I'm Canadian and have spent loads of time in the States.. Pretty sure most of you use "trash" or "garbage".. Anyway.. Ya learn something new every day!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Mate, I've been in the UK long enough to know the lingo Edit: It should be noted that a lorry is a *big* truck "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

2 countries seperated by a common language, Translation .. some big artic-lorry killed my Harley Americans don't use words like "dual carriage way", "bin", "bugger" or "lorry"!!! Translation: "Highway", "trash", "damn" and "truck or Mac-truck" "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

DUDE... SO glad you're ok.. Ya lucky bastard!! Sorry about the bike Main thing is you weren't too badly hurt. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Hope you have a really AWESOME 25th birthday!!!

Dear Dr. S My friend is an incredibly kind woman who cannot seem to find a date. Ever since she was a young girl of 40, she has been dreaming of that magical day when she would meet Mr. Perfect.. She even used to browse through wedding shops in the hope that she would find that magical dress for her big magical day with her magical Mr. Right.. The trouble is, over the years, she has put on some weight. She is now a horribly large woman who barely squeezes into a size 6. No matter how she tried to lose those extra pounds, she just seems to reach for those kitkats instead.. She feels ashamed of the way she has let herself go and feels that no man could possibly love her, which tragically only leads her to eat more ice-cream.. Honestly, it makes me sick to see my friend do this to herself - she is a lovely, intelligent girl who really should be able to control her eating. Dr. S.. Please, please help my friend - surely she's not a lost cause??? Signed, A concerned friend "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Ah ha ha!! This happened a couple of months ago, but I'm sure it would have felt much better after a kiss!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Somehow got my finger caught when I was *opening* the fridge.. Still can't figure out quite how this went down as there is NOTHING sharp about that door!!! Not a big boo-boo, but pretty dumb.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

I had a friend in highschool who "turned on me"... We were best friends for 7 years and I went away as an exchange student for one year.. When I came back, she had a whole new set of friends. I felt like any good friend would - I was happy for her that she had grown as a person and met new people.. Until one day, out of the blue, she stopped speaking to me. Suddenly, I was the biggest "b*itch" in the world.. It wasn't just the silent treatment - she and her friends all ganged up on me, threw insults my way, etc., etc.. I felt hurt and betrayed - she was my best friend; how could she be so mean? About 10 years later, she tagged me as a friend on facebook and I felt the old pain come rushing back. I thought I'd ask her why she suddenly started hating me and she told me it was because I'd slept with the guy she'd had a crush on for about 5 years.. I was totally shocked.. I mean, not only did I never sleep with him, but I still couldn't understand how you could throw away years of caring and support on that basis yet never have the decency to have even one conversation about it?! It's not until that moment that I realised she had always had a mean streak, but for the life of me, I couldn't understand why she felt the need to be so cruel over something like that - especially since it never even happened.. Anyway.. It was a long time ago.. But I always felt she did it because deep down inside she knew I wasn't a bad person and she needed to convince herself that I was. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

What he said! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

I feel pretty much the same. You know.. Over time, you get to know someone, and you may find that for one reason or another they're not quite what you expected.. Some surprise you and amaze you in ways you never imagine; some disappoint far more than you thought possible.. But it's all part of the journey.. If in getting to know someone you realise you don't work well together, it doesn't make the other person "bad" in my book.. Just not the right person for me. I have to say - I really admire people who stay friends with exes. I still haven't managed to retain any exes as friends. None of them are "enemies" - I just haven't kept in touch with any of them.. To be fair, I'm generally pretty bad at keeping in touch anyway.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

I think many good points have already been made. For me it boils down to this: minorities tend to stick together to support one-another. In skydiving, women are a minority - sticking together isn't to *exclude* men, but to support one-another. When it becomes inappropriate is when one group is withholding something from another group because it's in a position of power. Generally this is what majority groups do. In short, the reason why exclusion is offensive in one form and not in the other is that one represents oppression, and the other represents support. Honestly.. I can't think why a women-only forum would make men feel oppressed.. Not least because men are allowed to post there anyway!! They just have to be considerate that the forum mostly exists for women's concerns. If the boys want a boy-only forum, I don't think any of the ladies would complain - what is there to complain about?? Isn't the bonfire kind of a boy's forum anyway?!! What Karen said: "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

xtravsoul: Wow.. That has just given me such a different perspective, thank you for sharing. BP: Sorry to hear about the divorce.. That's painful and upsetting no matter how amicable the split was.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Don't think it's funny at all Not cause I find it offensive - just don't see it as funny.. If I were fat, I can't see why speeding down the road wouldn't be *so* much fun.. In fact, if I were really huge, it might be the only realistic way of feeling the wind on my face and feeling really wild and free.. I feel that way when I go for a run, but somehow I think weighing 300lb means running wouldn't feel quite so nice.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

If you are a chick, it is because you thought you could change him. If you are a guy, it's because she was hot. Ok.. This isn't exactly a serious response, but funny as it is (I certainly laughed out loud!!) I think you might have something here!! So what you're saying is you imagined qualities because of some impression the person made on you?! But would a relationship based only on this last years?? Seems unlikely.. (Point for making me laugh, anyway ) "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss

Umm.. Can't say I agree with you on this.. I know plenty of men who call their ex wives "that bitch" or "that whore" or "that gold-digger" etc., etc.. I also know women who keep apologising for their jerk ex-boyfriends because "he was confused" or "he was going through a rough time" etc.. I'm not sure either sex has the monopoly on saying nasty things about their ex.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss