tbrown

A few months back we actually had a tandem first jumper throw up in the plane and they brought her back down. But that's the first and only time I've ever heard of anyone doing that, except maybe for one experienced guy with a hangover who I once saw barf out the open door of a DC-3 (he then felt better & jumped). But that was over 25 years ago, so doesn't count. Moderation in all things Grasshopper. Don't overeat, but don't go hungry. Drinking the night before is not advisable, save it for the celebration afterwards. Stay away from the spicy stuff and keep it easy to digest. A nice bowl of cereal with some milk and toast should be just the ticket. And eat at least an hour or so before the jump, better to have the digestion well under way. No unpleasant surprises that way. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

First freefall was my 6th jump, after 5 static lines. I'd done a practice pull earlier in the day. Then my instructor told me I would also be doing my own packjob for this jump. "I'm gonna whaaaaaaa ?" "Pack your own chute." Oh god.... Not to worry, another instructor showed me every step of the way and watched over my shoulder. This was an old 28 ft round, packed in a sleeve and then into a 4 pin ripcord surplus container with a spring loaded pilot chute. So I was under the double whammy of hoping I would not only pull the ripcord, but that the damn thing would open at all. Went up on one of the last loads of the day, one of those nice July sunset loads where the air is getting delightfully cool. This time we were going UP - to 3200 ft. I could tell the ground looked SMALLER than it had before on my S/L jumps, which had been at 2500 - 2800 ft. I was starting to move up in the world, this was going to be cool - if I could just pull it and it would just open. Jump run, my instructor opened the door of the Cessna and spotted us right over the dropzone (there were no ground winds to speak of). "Feet in the door", he told me, "Get out", and "GO". I stepped right off and threw an arch. Righht away I was struck by the difference of the feeling, I didn't feel like I'd dropped away at all, I was just.... there. Okay, now look, there's the ripcord, grab it while I bring my left hand in over my head, and pull. It came about halfway and stopped. I gave it another punch and it came the rest of the way out. I could feel the pack breaking open on my back and in another moment was getting line stretch. Looking up I saw my canopy, MY PACKJOB open perfectly. And there I was, completely open, under a silent round surplus canopy, somewhere between 2500 and 3000 ft (no altimeter, we didn't usually start to use them until 15 second delays from 4500 ft - up through a 10 second delay, counting was considered safe enough). Along with my $8 fee for a first freefall, I'd also been assessed $5 for the keg fund (our DZ's variation on the case o' beer, our DZO kept a keg running after hours and he scrupulously saw to it that every special occasion or infraction was dunned the correct amount to keep the good times flowing). Never thought a beer tasted so good in my life and had another 8 or 9 just to be sure. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

With any luck, the newly minted word "santorum" will hopefully outlive this a-hole/presidential hopeful. We have Dan Savage, writer of the Savage Love column to thank for coining this word, which may yet find its way into the dictionary. Per this definition, santorum is the backflow from anal sex that tends to cause untidy problems with the bedsheets. Can't think of a better way to honor the jerk... Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

This a president who lies awake at night because he hears the cries of the stem cells. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Yeah, I grew up when we called them albums and they were LPs. But album is still not a bad word, because an album is a collection, like a photo album, which an LP never was either (though they were just big enough for PHENOMENAL cover art, something the modern CD simply can't offer). Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Better yet, take your cat to a vet and have them take pics. Then you'll have a professional witness to your cat's injuries. Have the fucker arrested, it's against the law to shoot people's pets, even if I would like to shoot my neighbor's dog a couple times a week...I only fantasize about it. We've got a cat who likes to go out and fight too. She kicked a bunch of ass at first, then got her own little butt kicked a bit too, so she's settled down and pretty much rules the walled in backyard here. The guy who broke the window's probably gonna get busted for it too, which is too bad. But it gets a message across, which is that the shootist is no longer safe over there. Hope he moves. Hope your cat's okay, be seeing you out at Perris soon I hope. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Grab ze skirt and twist ze bottom ! Sounds fun, I'll have to try that. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I will believe it when I see every gun , every bullet and every gram of semtex destroyed without the political backtracking and and dancing around the issue of decomissioning that we have seen in the past . Me too, and I'm an Irish - American whose great-great granfather fled Ireland as a fugitive. NPR had an interview with Martin McGuinness the other day and he danced around every single hard question by repeating words like "historic" and "monumental". The IRA ain't the same outfit it was in the 1920's when they really did fight for Irish freedom. They're a bunch of organized criminals who enforce their will with extrajudicial killings, or I guess we'd call that "murder" here in America ? When several IRA members stabbed a man to death in the parking lot of a pub recently, rather than name the killers to the police, the IRA made an offer to the victim's family to have the men executed for their crime. How thoughtful of them. They can kill whoever they please, even their own and answer to no one for it. If it's up to the Muslims to disown the terrorists among their community, so it is with those of us Americans of Irish descent to stop idolizing and funding these assholes. Half of them have trained with - or even trained Al Qaeda operatives in those shitty little terrorist bootcamps that dot the third world. Only difference is they're white and speak English (of a sort). They're every bit as evil and as dangerous as your average Muslim bomb tosser. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Not to mention that via static line, you are always "on your own" so to speak. That might mean more confidence for you. I trained on static line, which was the only way to go 30 years ago. As much as I appreciate the AFF method, I think there's something to be gained from the gradual approach of static line and then on to gradually increased freefalls. For starters, even on the static line, you are totally responsible for yourself the moment you leave the plane. When you start freefalling, you're responsible for pulling, no instructor is going to reach over and pull for you. It's really quite an accomplishment to do your own first pull, I still remember mine vividly on my 6th jump. And while starting off with lengthy freefalls in AFF is a good thing, so is approaching freefall in gradual 3, 5, 10, 15, 20, and 30 second steps until you're going the full 60 from 13 grand. As you make each step up and spend a little more time in freefall, your instructors will add to the skills and drills they want you to work on. But most importantly, you'll learn that a skydive from ANY altitude, for ANY delay is still a skydive and that it's even SAFE. There are too many AFF graduates who are just plain scared of jumping from less than 12 grand and they're terrified of pulling below 5 grand. It's really unfortunate too because it's not really their fault. They started out with high jumps and high pulls and taking it down lower, to perfectly safe altitudes like 3 or 4 grand subjects them to a degree of visual ground rush they're just not accusomed too. We talk to so many AFF grads who are making their mandatory hop & pop from as much as 5 grand, who tell us on the ride up how stressed out they're feeling about it. It makes me feel like want to offer to give up my slot on thedive I'm going up on and offer to lead them out and say, "just follow me, it will be fun". If you start out by pulling or opening at 3500 ft, or whatever it is these days for S/L, you're going to feel comfy with it right from the get-go, and after that learning to take it down to 3 grand, or even 2.5 in a pinch won't bother you so much. The S/L progression might take a little longer, but you may well internalize what you learn better than an AFF seven jump wonder. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I've asked for two weekends to check it out (plus the reserve needs a repack). I would like my rigger to go through it and my coach to test jump it. The seller thinks this is an unreasonable request. Maybe it is. Will someone please give me some perspective on this? Tell the seller to take a hike and move on. Don't let yourself get pressured into thinking that this rig or any other is THE rig you've just GOT to have. Because it ain't. It might just be a perfect rig at a great price. But the truth is, there will be others and plenty of them, you just have to be patient. On the used market yuou and the seller both have reasons to feel nervous about sending money or a valuable rig off to a stranger. But you have every right to have the rig inspected and to put a few jumps on it. If the seller won't go for that, then adios, don't bother with them. Give the guy one more chance to send the rig direct to a respected drop zone or loft. If he won't go for it, then move on. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Can't say what the plane is, but sure does look like Rainier. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Had some wasabi cashews at a party a few weeks back. Forgot what "wasabi" was until I popped 'em in my mouth and then I suddenly remembered (oh yeah) ! Fortunately I had a nice pint of Anchor Porter in my other hand and it was a BIG help. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

So whatever happened to Chardonnay ? Merlot and Chardonnay are both sort of being overdone to the puke point these days (try a Zinfandel or a Pinot Noir with your next steak for heaven's sake). But I still like good old Chardy. Good old Charles Shaw, aka "Two Buck Chuck" is $1.99 at Trader Joe's and is surprisingly good ! I mean why drop $14 on on some fancy label that means "monkey's butt" if you translate it into English ? Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

"If this condition persists for more than 4 hours, seek medical attention immediately." Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button. False. Gotta be unless it was surgically removed, in which case he DID have one. I'm pretty sure it's true, Hitch did NOT have a navel. There was some strange, but logical explanation for it. Can't remember what it was right now, but I've heard it before. That or he was a demon seed..... But look at it this way, it's WAY too weird for someone to have made it up. Start there and search for the explanation. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

My wife has two male best friends. One's gay and the other one's het (and married to one of her best girlfriends). We've been together a long time, like 25 years, 24 of them married. She doesn't worry if I have women friends. Neither of us has been unfaithful to each other yet, though 8 years ago when we went through a rough patch and she was going to Europe, I gave her "permission" to have a fling as long as she was safe & smart about it and didn't tell me about it. She says she didn't & I believe her. And if she did, I said she could. As close as you can be with each other, you're not enough to fill ALL the spaces and needs in each other's lives. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I have a very high regard for both of them and they play very different games. But Lance seems to be the more consistent, where Tiger's had good and bad years throughout Lance's extrodinary winning streak. And Lance has come back from a cancer that killed one of my brothers. Plus he's boning Sheryl Crow... Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

It's Monday morning and there's nothing new in the Incidents thread. The one area I really LIKE seeing no new posts. Congrats to all for a safe & enjoyable summer weekend ! Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

It's not just hindsight though. The London Police have had decades of experience with bombings in the city during the No. Ireland "Troubles". At the height of the Troubles, the IRA was nervy enough to even launch a mortar attack on 10 Downing St (sort of a shame they didn't get Maggie Thatcher though...). One of the things the cops should've learned from those years is that shooting people isn't effective when it only makes martyrs of them. What actually stopped the IRA was hanging out all those cameras all over town. The IRA got tired of watching themselves on TV in courtrooms in front of pissed off juries and they gave up on it. Now there are differences with these Muslim guys. Unlike the IRA, they're suicide bombers, while the IRA would detonate stuff with timers or remote control. But again you're dealing with people who are bent on becoming martyrs anyway, so what do they care if they get shot ? The cops have a real point that they're dealing with a suspect who only needs to push a button, or even take a finger OFF a button they've already pushed. It's a situation where shooting to kill MAY be warranted. But let's look at what happened. They had the guy subdued and they killed him anyway. Even if he was a bomber, shooting him may not have prevented him from exploding on the platform anyway. And as it is now, the government of Brazil has formally requested the British government to please explain themselves - which any government, including ours (I hope...) would do if their police killed an unarmed citizen. There's no bleeding heart here, just seriously questioning if this is accomplishing what it's supposed to. I would hate like hell to be a non-white person living in London these days, I'd be scared shitless. If the Muslims don't get you, the cops will is what I'd be thinking. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Took a break for 22 years. Got married and raised some kids. The wife always insisted I'd jump again, even during the years I didn't believe her. She was right. She's all for it too - says she'd rather have me jumping out of airplanes than on some blonde any day (no offense intended to you blondes out there...). Ive been back for two years now and LOVE 21st century skydiving, it's even better. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Why, I was once on a 60-way where we damn near suffocated when we punched a cloud . . . -bill von Well Bill, you just better get on the ball and evolve some gills then ! Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

What the hell, tub o' lard guys wear thongs. Maybe they're looking for each other.....but I doubt it. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I'm just concerned about the porcupine. I have no sympathy for dogs whatever, take the fucker out back and shoot it. dogs are vicious and cowardly, always looking for a chance to slip back into the wild thing. Kill 'em all. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Just make sure she's not one of those uppity bitches that owns a handgun.... Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Yeah, yeah and then he could've talked about his own DUI tickets. The point being that drunken driving crosses party lines and that both of those sob's are spoiled rich boys who can and sometimes do get away with killing people. Look how long it took to put that Skakel asshole away for beating young Martha Moxley to death with a fucking golf club. I'm sure Bush has killed somebody, we just haven't heard about it... Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !