livendive

Finally an explanation! I've been wondering why so many bad things happen to me! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

So yesterday you started this thread on the premise that I'm creepy looking, and today you say I look good. Ever wonder why us men are confused by women? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

As much as it may disappoint you Jason, I really don't care to see your ass. I'll still try and treat you the same as I would anyone else though. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I thought you were proud of the hook-ups you've figured out? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

It's the only time I can get anyone to listen to me! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I've been thinking of shaving mine as well. Are ya glad ya did it or not? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Don't encourage him Karen. You're just perpuating the cycle. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

How'd my picture end up in an article about a murderer? I don't even own a chainsaw! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Sta....Wait - how many cabana boys does a girl need?! Happy birthday Pop! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Every instructor is different...here's mine: "Hi...you're name is (blank)? I'm Dave and you're going to be my victim today. OK, the way this works, we've four points of connection. These two up here (point), I'll hook up as soon as we get in the airplane and won't unhook till after we land. So you're not getting away from me. These two down here are adjustable, to keep our bodies tight together in freefall instead of washing around on each other. They're not real comfortable, so I won't worry about them till later. During the climb to altitude, you'll be sitting between my legs, and then about 5 minutes before we jump I'll have you get up on my lap and I'll hook these two up and tighten them down. When the door opens, it gets a little intimidating. It's windy and loud and might be a little cold. The camera man will climb out under the wing, and then it's our turn to get in the door. I want you to cross your arms before we head that direction, because otherwise it's often times a lot like trying to push a cat into a toilet (exhibit outstreched arms with locked elbows). This is where it gets REAL intimidating. I'm going to have you duck your head under the top of the door and will hang you almost completely outside of the airplane. Only the top of your butt will be left on the door frame. Keep your legs together and pull your head back, and then we'll go. As soon as we leave, I want you to stick your belly out and your legs back between mine. (Stand behind them) Can you reach back and kick me in the butt with one foot? Cool. That's what I'll want both of your legs to do. A lot of people forget that, and if you do you'll feel my heels in your thighs. I'm not going to wrestle with you up there, it'll just be a gentle reminder. As soon as I've got that little drogue parachute out that you saw in the video, I'll tap you on the shoulders. This is your signal to bring your arms out, I want to see them approximately straight across the shoulders and 90 degrees at the elbows. If you're not comfortable with this, just keep them in and that'll be fine. Outside of the heels in thighs and the shoulder tap, the only other signal I'd give you in freefall is to grab your forehead and pull up. I'll only do that if you're completely fixated on the ground because that makes for really boring video. So if you feel it, pull your chin up, look at the camera, and smile, stick your tongue out, scream, whatever you want. The only part of me you can see in freefall is my hands and the most important thing for you to remember is that you can't grab them. If you do the panicked swimmer thing and lock on to both of my wrists, who's going to open the parachute? (let that sink in) Right...I have plans tonight, so don't grab my hands. The camera man may come in and grab your arm. If he does, it's ok to grab his back, but if he shakes it, let it go. We can't talk in freefall, that's only in the movies, but as the parachute is opening you'll hear me yelling "Watch him, watch him, watch him". This is your reminder to watch the camera man fall away. Trust me, it's a very cool visual. Then I'll tell you we have a good parachute. If we don't, I'll say "ARCH!" and want you to get in the same position as when we left the airplane (arms crossed, legs back, belly out), but I don't expect that to happen. Then I'll have you stand up on my feet and I'll loosen up those bottom straps because we're not in freefall anymore and they've done their job. It feels a little odd, but don't worry, you're not getting away from me. We'll do one practice landing, with both of your knees drawn up toward your chest and then we'll be free to fly the parachute around however we want...peacefully enjoying the scenery or doing spins & stuff, provided we're close to the airport. Remember on the landing, we want my feet to touch the ground first so we don't faceplant, and we want your legs bent so we don't injury your knees. The farther up you can pull your legs the better. So the rules are...belly out & legs back on exit, arms out when I tap your shoulders. Make sure you look at the camera and smile, and don't grab my hands. After the parachute opens we can talk again. Sound easy enough? Cool, let's go play" Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Yes. Your experience was relatively normal. Young female jumpers (especially the attractive ones) routinely get invited on loads that they shouldn't be on. A guy with the same experience and perhaps even better skills is considerably less likely to get invited on those loads. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I'm kinda slow sometimes, please explain this to me. What "thing" did you fall into? Being an attractive girl , our instruction is often times half-assed. A guy is gonna get better more thorough intruction b/c he is a guy, an attractive girl, maybe not always the case, but flirting often takes the place of a thorough education. I know of SEVERAL girls who have expierenced this, and mine was doubly bad b/c I am attractive and I b/c I was a jumpers wife.... I've been around enough to know what trap some attractive young female jumpers fall into. That's not it. The trap is getting invited on skydives that are over their head, by guys hoping to play the "I'll take care of you and you'll have a blast and maybe give up a piece" card. I know that sounds close, but it's not the same. When applied to the learning environment, it works in the opposite direction...you express an interest in learning about something and the guys will beat a path to you hoping to play the "I'll share my knowledge with you in hopes that you'll be grateful and maybe give up a piece" card. My advice is to take responsibility for your own education. If you realize there's something you don't know, hound people until you do know it. Also, when you screw yourself up skydiving, take responsibility for it yourself. It was your ass hanging in that harness, not your instructor's, and not your ex-husband's. You made the decision to jump without shoes, you made the decisions that left you landing on the tarmac, you didn't flare. All I've heard you do is blame everyone else, none of whom were making those decisions for you. A lack of knowledge may have been a contributing factor, but you need to accept that you had the major role in this chain of events. Learn from your mistakes, be grateful they weren't more costly, do better next time. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Ask? I know, it's a crazy idea, but what's the worst that could happen? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

That's a few years old ain't it? I remember seeing that one or one very like it a few years ago. Hope she didn't do it TWICE! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

It'd have to beat out an awful lot of them wouldn't it? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

"Mal" seems like such a strong word Roy, given that I've landed that canopy on rears on numerous occasions. I guess I should defer to you on this subject though, given you outnumber me in experience with almost every type of mal imaginable. How many reserve rides do you have now? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I'd take him up on this Jason. Roy has a TON of experience with making mistakes. You can learn a lot about making mistakes from him. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I have pictures like that, with the same anchors/strings and everything. I hit the PT hard, and my doctor cleared me to skydive less than two months after the surgery. It worked great for 6 or 8 months, then a botched a hook and got to have a big open surgery (as opposed to arthroscopic) in which they harvest some bone from my iliac crest and bolted it into my shoulder to act as a sort of brick wall on the outside of the labrum. That way when the humeral head tried to tear its way through, it ran into more resistance than the soft tissue is capable of providing. That second surgery took quite a bit longer to recover from. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Seconded. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I am too here! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Is there any prescription drug that DOESN'T say avoid alcoholic drink? I've never seen one. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Its a picture of a really odd looking couple. She's not so bad, but he's a really freaky looking guy. I mean, I wouldnt want to associate myself with him. Tolerance man, tolerance. Just because he's not into the man-on-man thing doesn't mean you can't associate with him on a purely platonic level. Wait...I've changed my mind. Aucune carte de sejour pour vous! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I have this one. It's a monster, but easy to set up and tear down. I call it my Taj Mahal. It has a screen room big enough for an ice chest and a couple chairs, plus shoe storage "pockets" so you don't have to track mud/dirt inside. Inside, it's plenty tall enough for most people to stand up in. Also, two interior walls can be hung if for some reason privacy was desirable. Doors on every side, "skylights", etc... It's sweet for boogies etc. Wouldn't want to hike with it though...it's freaking heavy and has a pretty big footprint. All in all I'm really happy with mine. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Funny...I was under the impression that having to duck under things wasn't a problem you ever encounter. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

BIG qualifier - I haven't seen the picture. I'm at work and don't break the NSFW boundaries here. That said, don't all people deserve tolerance as long as they're not harming others? That doesn't mean you have to like them or condone what they do, just respect their right to do it. What's the difference between tolerating someone's choice of religion and tolerating someone's choice of body jewelry? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)