livendive

just cuz. Is that your expert opinion from having lived through both years? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

If you want to see McBeth's boobs, and Shell's, I guess I will have to let you help But I bet Dave will need a prostate exam (and I ain't doing it) Prostate exam or prostate massage.....the massaging is a whole different thing...and I think that is now the step child's job....not mine How did you know?! I've been told it's not my job...it's my privilege. Lets clarify....it is "his" privelage to be on that receiving end I just wanna know...how/why in the fuck did my prostate get involved in this discussion?! But yes, if I ever feel the need to have it massaged, it'd be Muttley I'd allow the honor...and I'm not old enough to need an exam yet so Doc Ed is out of luck. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I usually go with the phonesex angle, asking them what they're wearing, what color their hair is, what would they do to me, what I'd like to do to them, etc... Of course that was all back when I had a land line. I didn't give the number out, so whenever it rang, I knew what it was and could answer accordingly. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Jeebus but you picked a good year to start paying attention. 1990 was our first winning season, and seeing the Ken Griffey Jr and Sr duo playing in the outfield together was quite the Kodak moment. The father-son back-to-back jacks that year were just silly church league softball absurdity...and I mean that in the nicest possible way.

Actually, the best series ever was the one immediately preceding that one...the 5 game set against the Yankees. For those of us who had suffered long, we finally had our payoff. Trailing the Angels by 13 games in August, the M's closed out the season with a 25-11 run to force a one game do-or-die playoff that included an in-the-park grand slam by Luis Sojo. They then dropped the first two against the NYY, despite battling 15 innings in game 2 (finished by a Leyritz homer...the same guy who'd threatened earlier in the season to have his homies waiting outside the stadium to kick Randy Johnson's ass). They were looking done. They came back to win three in a row, all at home. Randy and Black Jack McDowell started game 3, then both came in as relievers in game 5, which was started by David Cone...catch that? Three Cy Youngs pitched in Game 5, two of them on two days rest. I and several of my friends can give you the final call by Dave Niehaus in the 11th inning, and the shot of Junior under the pile at homeplate was one of the best sport pictures I've seen. For those of you who can hear Dave's voice in your head...the call.

I am the biggest loser ever, and getting older and more forgetful is a fucking pain in the ass. Happy belated birthday Gia...my bad. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Now if I could just find that leopard thong... I have it. I just might have to bring one. Just one? Why don't you bring your entire collection? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Lots:6:0 Pulled double duty due to mamajumps frustration

Sounds great! We'll enjoy all the boobies while you're shit out of luck for not attaching any. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Oddly enough, he usually got my last drink in the Lounge each year. So he cheered your arrival and my departure. Thanks for the drinks and the stories over the years Mac, you'll definitely be missed. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I wish I hadn't asked. Batons don't have a particularly large OD, much less ID! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Yeah well thanks for nothing. Now my two months w/o getting laid will go on to three. I guess it'll just be me and my baton again tonight. She's so trustworthy and loyal..... *sigh* "She"? Aren't batons kind of, umm, phallic? And you wonder why we give you so much flak! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

As close as you can get to bailey's without getting your eyes wet. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I figured he meant it was the habit he was worst at, not his worst habit. But really, I think he meant what you said...he was complaining yesterday about it having been 2 months. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Umm, that's nice. So is this "3 men movers" more like vaseline or KY? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

QuotePeople need to QUIT FUCKING TELLING ME how GODDAM 'tired' they are. It pisses me off to NO END. I haven't had two days in a row of sleeping through the entire night in over 9 fucking years. Quote So what you're saying is that you're tired? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

When I was in high school I worked at a Pizza Hut delivery place. The girlfriend of one of our drivers dumped him, and a couple weeks later a guy called right before closing and ordered a pizza to her address. As luck would have it, we still had two drivers, one of them the jilted guy. He took the pizza in the bathroom and jacked off on it, then the other driver delivered it, so as not to arouse suspicion. I don't order pizza late at night. Ever. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Sorry about your camera, but there's no fucking way I'm doing a naked handstand for you. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

That wouldn't be surprising if he was brushing his teeth at the time. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

g I didn't sell out, I just learned what I was missing...the same things you're missing now while we're set to private. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

So you obviously like going to clubs where people wee on each other! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I never bothered trying, but now that you mention it, it's kinda like a henweigh, right? Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

Believe what ewe want, eye no I'm knot getting old! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

I'm not going to bother reading it, but please tell me there's going to be some sort of nascar on TV tonight! Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)

There was a zero option when I posted it, but it didn't make it through. Blues, Dave "I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew)