Slappie

Not much of a story. Just like all Graduation jumps I flailed!! hehehehe had a blast though Zennie. Started off I was going to try and jump a sit-fly with Zennie and Matt{non dz.com guy} We were talking about it and then some other guy {can't remember his name but he likes to lurk peoples jumps} wanted in so I reluctently said ok. Then he starts asking others and stuff. I was getting nervous, I just wanted a small 3-way with people I knew pretty well from sitting around talking. Well anyway we got in the plane rode to alti! What a trip not being in the back of the plane and trying to remember everything I had to preform!!

BELLY FLY??????? NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well unless you in your bikini!! I might try it My New Website with 24hr Chat

I finished my afp course yesterday and I did it in STYLE!!!

Apology accepted. Thanks fruce

Hey everyone, We have friends from Pakistan who are camping their way around the States. They have asked me if I know where they might be able to go without spending large amounts of money. I said I would try my friends and family for accommodations. I realize many of you are in different parts of the U.S. so I thought I'd give all of your names. They travel light, bring all their own camping gear and only require a small place to set up. They might need to use your bathroom in the morning but other than that, you'd hardly notice they are there at all. I have attached a picture to help identification if they turn up. They may bring the green Mercedes or the white one - sometimes they use both. Some one please help out my friends. My New Website with 24hr Chat

fruce I am only answering this because you found it in yourself to flame me. I was not in anyway making light of the fact it is a disease that claims many lives each year! Now get off F*ckin high horse and go put some stickers on chix butts. That's about all I have to say! If you don't like what someone has posted IGNORE IT! DuH! I have met and known many people with cancer! I lost a TRUE LOVE To Lymphoma so fuckin do not tell me how damn bad this disease is!! She was only 30!! Now go bitch to someone else!! The post wasn't to you in the first place you pompus bastard! I was just messin with FFP and no where in my post did I type FRUCE! My New Website with 24hr Chat

I finally got it to work... instead of using the link posted I went to the website and went a different way to the game.... Pretty funny! I hit the flag and got run over by the truck My New Website with 24hr Chat

I've let it count up over 1080 and still nothing but COUNTING!! Someone tell me how this thing works? My New Website with 24hr Chat

freeflyplaymate I just want to offer you my services as a trained breast examiner. I will gladly do this service for free! Just let me know when you want to set up your appointment. My schedule looks pretty clean from now until you reply

Goodness folks!!! I got it in an Email and thought it was pretty good... *puts on his flame retardant pants!!* My New Website with 24hr Chat

For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control. The following came from an anonymous mother in Sunnyvale, CA. THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM MY CHILDREN HONEST AND NO KIDDING: 1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep. 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 3. One 3-year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant. 4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman-cape. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room. 5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way. 6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan. 7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh", it's already too late. 8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it. 9. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day. 10. Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old. 11. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence. 12. Super glue is forever. 13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water. 14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O. 15. VCRs do not eject Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches, even though TV commercials show they do. 16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes. 17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving. 18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is. 19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens. Nor do bags of bread. 20. The fire department in Sunnyvale, CA has a 5-minute response time. 21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy. It will however make cats dizzy. 22. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. 23. Eggs in the shell and microwave ovens give a whole new meaning to scrambled. 24. A whole box of some detergents in a washing machine can fill a laundry room to the ceiling or cover a patio to the depth of ten feet if applied to a working hot tub. 25. It costs $358.00 to have water removed from the gas tank and fuel system of a Blazer. 26. In Sunnyvale the police question you if you take an accident-prone child to the emergency twice in three days. 27. It is virtually impossible to flush a cat down the toilet. My New Website with 24hr Chat

How to Drive a Cop Crazy!! A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange: Officer: May I see your driver's license? Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI. Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle? Driver: It's not my car. I stole it. Officer: The car is stolen? Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there. Officer: There's a gun in the glove box? Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk. Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!? Driver: Yes, sir. Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation: Captain: Sir, can I see your license? Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid. Captain: Who's car is this? Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner' card.The driver owned the car. Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it? Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box. Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it. Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body. Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk. Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too! "Drive Fast, Take Chances, Pass on the Right and Talk Back To Cops!!" My New Website with 24hr Chat

READ THIS BEFORE YOU OPEN THE PICTURE: A class of elementary students wanted to make a planter to take home and wanted to have a plant that was easy to take care of in it so it was decided to use cactus plants. The students planted the cactus seeds in the planters and they grew nicely but unfortunately were not allowed to take them home. See attachment to see why. The cactus plants were removed and a small ivy replaced them and the children were then allowed to take them home. My New Website with 24hr Chat

It's long but, it's a pretty good read.... A Message by George Carlin The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less. We buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less. These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit 'delete'. Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. To all my friends in my life, thanks for being there My New Website with 24hr Chat

This was stupid all it did was count up? My New Website with 24hr Chat

It's my understanding they don't send the license card anymore. The one I got along with my Yellow Proficiency Card = an A License... I may be wrong. If so someone please school me here

Now how do I get you to BLUSH?? hehehe

Yupppppppp I'm so happy, now all I have to do is get my Instructor to stamp my prof. card and I'm LEGAL! I think My New Website with 24hr Chat

I am USPA Number 174860

A first grade class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. The first little boy called upon walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard, then sat back down. Puzzled, the teacher asked him just what it was. "It's a period," said the little boy. "Well I can see that" she said, "but what is so exciting about a period?" "Damned if I know," said the little boy, "but this morning my sister was missing one, Dad had a heart attack, Mom fainted, and the man next door shot himself." My New Website with 24hr Chat

This one is for the days you just need a little extra help dealing with the a$$holes!! See attatchment.............. My New Website with 24hr Chat

I think we may have to ask Omri about the flying camels.. Where they can fly stable or not.. Just a thought. He's always got the nickname in my chat as CamelGoof *shrugs*

Pammi, I've never met a woman named Heath? Well anyway Heath welcome to DZ.com...... Hope you enjoy it as much as I have. I'm still a student too. 3 jumps and a Hop & Pop away!!!! I can't wait! Good luck and Blue Skies! My New Website with 24hr Chat

Well if everything goes as planned this week! I should be graduating this weekend at Spaceland in Houston. I wanted to this weekend but the weather postponed jumping till early afternoon and I only got 2 jumps on Saturday. Then woke up to rain on Sunday so I didn't even go out, went to a buddies house and sat around drinking beer. Even if the weather was perfect I didn't think I had enough money to finish! I only have lvls 12,13,14 & 15 which is a HnP... then I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

MM go to your local Army Surplus store and look for some BDU's make sure there baggy. I bought some none issue Purple and White Camo... Looks freaky in the air and on the DZ! Also make sure they tie at the ankles. Got the idea from Zennie. I made two jumps in them yesterday and they worked great for head down. Plus I found they acually helpped me stay in my sit longer.... To each his own I say... I saw all kinds of different color Camo, from bright yellow, orange, purple blue and the normal green. You may need to call around and see if your stores sell the "colored" camo pants/bdu's My New Website with 24hr Chat