rhino

(Ignore that the fatuous flexibility of the legal system shown below and its funny) Mario and Frankie were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court on Friday before the Judge. The Judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court on Monday." Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to Frankie "How did you do over the weekend?" "Well, Your Honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever". "17 people? That's wonderful! What did you tell them?" "I used a diagram, Your Honor. I drew two circles like this: O o and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs." "That's admirable!" said the Judge. To Mario the judge said, "And you, how did you do?" "Well, Your Honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever." "156 people! That's amazing!! How did you manage to do that?!?!" "Well, I used a similar approach. I drew two circles ... o O ...and said (pointing' to the small circle) this is your asshole before going to prison......." Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

CLINTON'S PARTING SHOTS ... After much arguing and deliberation, historians this week have come up With a phrase to describe the Clinton Era. It will be called: SEX BETWEEN THE BUSHES. The Center for Disease Control in Atlanta announced that Clinton has proven that you can get sex from Aides. Gennifer Flowers was asked if her relationship with Clinton was anything Like Monica Lewinski's. She replied, "Close, but no cigar." The FBI has coined a technical term for the stains found on Monica's dress: "Presidue." Clinton now recruits interns from only four colleges: Moorhead, Oral Roberts, Ball State and Brigham Young. Did you know that Clinton had asked to change the Democratic emblem from a donkey to a condom? It represents inflation, halts production, and gives you a false sense of security while you are being screwed. Arkansas is very proud of Bill Clinton. All these women coming forward, and not one is his sister! Finally, Hillary Clinton recently went to a fortuneteller who intoned, "Prepare to become widow. Your husband will soon suffer a violent death!" Hillary took a deep breath and asked, "Will I be acquitted?" Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Here is a modern bedtime story for the kids..... ORIGINAL VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying in supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying in supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well-fed while others are cold and starving. CNN, CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house, where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share." Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of Federal judges that Bill had appointed from a list of single parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

This is why the titanic sank!!! Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

"Three girlfriends go on vacation together. In their travels,they see a six-story hotel with a large flashing sign that says,"FOR WOMEN ONLY." Since they are without their boyfriends, they decide to go in. A very attractive man at the front desk greets them and says, "Well,ladies, this is how this hotel works. We have five guest floors, each with its own specialty. Once you find what you're looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide - each floor has a sign right outside the elevator telling you what's inside." So up they go. On the first floor the sign reads, "All the men here are rotten lovers, but they are sensitive and kind." The friends laugh and, without hesitation, move on to the next floor. The sign there reads, "All the men here are fantastic lovers, but they tend to treat women rather badly." This won't do, so the girls move on to the third floor where they read, "All the men here are great lovers and sensitive to the needs of women." "Woo-ooh," says one woman, "sounding good!" However, with two more floors to go, they can't resist going upwards. On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect. "All the men here have perfect bodies, are sensitive and attentive to women, are perfect lovers, and each one is single and very very rich." They do hesitate for a moment, but decide that they just have to go up to the final floor. As the door opens, they see a big flashing sign that reads.......... THERE ARE NO MEN HERE!! THIS FLOOR WAS ONLY BUILT TO PROVE THERE IS NO F***ING WAY TO PLEASE A WOMAN!! Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Two little boys are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first boy leans over and asks, "What are you in here for? The Second boy says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm little nervous." The first boy says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze." The second boy then asks, "What are you here for?" The first boy says, "A circumcision." And the second boy says, "Whoa, I had that done when I was born. Couldn't walk for a year." Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

THE BEST DRINKING STORY EVER From the State where drinking and driving is considered a sport, comes a true story from Texas. Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighborhood bar. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his own car which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a dry night), flicked the hazard flasher on and off, tooted the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained stationary for a few more minutes as more patrons left in their vehicles. At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the street. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a Breathalyzer test. To his amazement the Breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the Police station, this Breathalyzer equipment must be broken." "I doubt it," said the man, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

LMFAO!! Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Cool.. I'll check it out.. Thanks a bunch!! Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

so the forward speed of a canopy makes up for the steeper dive angle flying into a strong wind? Still seems like wind coming from in front of you could be dangerous if your canopy is trimmed at a steep angle. Is there a optimum glide angle for safety, and penetration in full flight? All the different inlet shapes, airlocks, makes it hard to figure out. I'm trying to understand the method to the madness. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Draw one for me and tell me what you mean? I was just quick sketching it as an example.. I'm curious as to air in the inlets and over/under the wing... Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Which of the 2 in this picture are more apt to handle turbulence? The one flying into the wind or the one flying down? Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

What is the secret?? You got it wet didn't you?? lol Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Awwww.. Are you little feelings hurt?? Can't play in your own reindeer games? How do you manage to stand up with no spinal cord? My God please explain this to me? I am so intimidated by your threats.. Please boys.. Grow up.. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

We like you just the way you are

I'll pm you to tell you I don't give a fuck what you think.. Give me a sec.. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Funny.. Not a single person has pm'd asking me anything?? hmmm??? Easy to see who has a backbone and who doesn't.. IN GENERAL. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

I started the thread.. I'll post as many damned times as I want.. pm me if you have a problem.. I'm not suppose to respond to you calling me a pain in the ass.. ??? funny.. How many times did the author of the my girlfriends boobies post? Your not giving him a hard time? Hypocrite.. I hope that isn't worse than calling me a pain in the ass.. If any of you are tired of reading so damned much get back on the fucking subject.. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

That chick is fine... PHAT Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Now that I consider a personal attack.. If you want to insult me and call me a know it all pm me and I will gladly respond to your lack of being able to be an adult. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

That kicks ass.. I hope she got free beer that nioght

At least that is what he tells you.. You have to decide if he is telling the truth or not.. If he feared rejection or if his penis was 2 inches long do you think he would tell you?? HELL NO.. LOL Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

Nice try.. Nope.. Not gonna play this one... Men are disgusting.. Women are beautiful.. Pretty simple to me..

I'm not abusing anything.. When you say something to me I have the right to respond.. If you guys want to keep wasting more bandwidth keep responding to me if it makes you feel better. Give me a break... LMFAO!!!! Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com

I'm not being rude.. Give it a break.. Semper Fi ..... http:// www.aahit.com