lowtimer

No problem, anytime you need my services, just ask! ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

I'm willing to make necessary sacrifices! ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

great minds think alike.... I'm sure she's a really nice girl, I'll see what I can do for ya!

thought I'd beat Ivan to it.... that effing perv..... ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

I'm bored...and definitely not as good looking but here ya go! The first is me goofing off in Iraq, the last two are after covering 47 miles in two days on an island in Lake Superior! Wheee!!!!! ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

2 reasons why I didn't get laid in high school: In eighth grade I was in an AP math class at the high school and would stay for the study period afterwards. I sat right in front of a table full of senior football players. They had this game where they would alternate saying 'penis' louder and louder until one would quit. I thought if I could top them, my popularity would instantly increase (and maybe I would finally get some ass--teenage logic). So they were playing the game, I could hear them behind me and all of a sudden sweet silence. I decided this was my moment to shine and yelled 'PENIS!' as loud as I possibly could. Everyone turned around initially laughing but there looks quickly turned to horror. I turned around as well, and there stood the reason for the silence of the seniors. The superintendent of THE WHOLE FUCKING DISTRICT (who also happened to be the pastor at my church) was standing in the door. My popularity could only be measured by the shouts of references to male genitalia following me through the halls. At least I got a weeks' vacation from school! My stupidity knows no bounds. One year later I was still all braces, freakishly red hair and skin that made Casper look like a bronzed god. A senior girl (cheerleader, no less) sat in front of me and I would give her the answers to her physics homework (for purely altruistic reasons, of course). Well, she was actually asking about ME for once and I thought 'holy shit, she might LIKE me!' I managed to keep my wood under control. Unfortunately, the Taco Bell I had eaten for lunch wasn't quite agreeing with me and I was holding in an enormous green cloud of gas, enduring an incredible amount of pain in the process. To complicate matters further I was getting over a cold and sneezing regularly. I felt a sneeze coming up, and knew I wasn't going to be able to suppress the inevitable expulsions from both of my orifices (orifici?) Panic set in, and I quickly hatched a plan. I decided I would let the sneeze go while clenching my ass so hard you couldn't get a greased needle up it. With an outward calm that belied my tumultous interior (mental and intenstinal), I asked the cheerleader to excuse me, covered my mouth and sneezed normally. Immediately afterward a secondary explosion to rival Nagasaki emanted from my ass. Sounded like a minigun, actually. Canvas ripping. A cloud of VX enveloped the cheerleader and I and she made sure the whole room knew it smelled BAD. I don't think anyone heard her, though, as the room was filled with riotous laughter. To this day I am proud of my recovery: Pointed to the teacher and said, "I bet you can't beat that one, buddy!" Oh, and she never sat near me or talked to me again. I can't say I blame her, gas masks ARE expensive. Sorry for the book. ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

The marathon is Oct 10, it'll be quite difficult to find a room ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

Well, since I gotta wait until Friday...maybe Adam can step up and help him out ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

I don't think that's quite legal, unfortunately ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

So I'm sitting in stats class now, dicking around on dzcom when I should be entering data. The chick in front of me has a tendency to lean forward in her chair, and I get to see a new thong every other day!

If you need a hired goon, I'm quite available! ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

1. When did you know it was time to get out? When I thought not having an education could potentially bite me in the ass later, and I could get said education for free! I also found myself hating garrison more than I liked the field. 2. How did you handle the transition? Not well initially. Started school in Chicago and didn't know anyone. Felt alienated from the kids at school. Drank a lot. Academic probation & dropped out. Came out of IRR & volunteered for Iraq. Came back from there and got my shit together with the help of childhood friends and army buddies! Back in school and liking it!

41 when I was 20....ahhhhh

I'm not sure if they still do it, but Second City had a free improv set at 10:30pm or so Sunday-Thursday. Then go and drink with the performers at Corcoran's across the street! That establishment is THE reason why I had to leave UIC Lotsa good memories, though

Your co-workers are so lucky! You should wear that next weekend!

The tight pants of California's finest....and I'm goin' commando, too ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

The Cap'n Iron Sam Kidd Huh. Nothing like a drunk ol' Iron Sam yelling "surrender your booty!" to women. This is a sure thing ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

I'm gonna start making his happy noise whenever I hit the peas. Which is infrequent ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

"Work is the curse of the drinking classes" ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

DI runs from 6am to 10pm in my apartment!!! I love that vocal trance channel!

I just started at ISU and am curious if any other students here skydive. If there are any out there, PM me and we can go jump!

I am Illinos State's oldest junior (26)! Hooray for me! I worked for a bit before attending university and it's important to realize that you don't necessarily HAVE to see your degree as locking you into a certain career. Having a formal e-ju-ma-cation opens doors later on in life for you to make the changes in your life that you feel are necessary. One of my friends graduated from Southerin Illinois with a degree in zoology. Yeah, he designs web sites now. He wouldn't have been hired by his IT company if he didn't have that degree, though. It's fucked up, yeah, but it's a hoop you have to jump through! (too bad they're not flaming hoops, that would be cool) I'm getting a degree in PoliSci. Am I going into politics? No. Do I like to get into arguments and bullshit other people? Yes! I would really like to be a fireman, but completing university will give me greater flexibility should I decide to pursue something else later on... ...and the chicks at ISU are really hot, too ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

"I bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the god damned common courtesy to give him a reach around!" I mean really, all it takes is a little extra effort right? Jeez, how inconsiderate. ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!

why?... it's free!

At Fort Bragg, there's a Revolutionary War skirmish site in a marshy area. Rumor had it that at night strange noises would come from that area. My team and I were doing land nav training one night, and we ended up taking a short break at the site. I thought one of our guys was moving about to take a leak or something, but we were all sitting still. The looks on my buddies' faces indicated that I wasn't the only one hearing it (or scared shitless). The sound of people walking increased and lasted for a couple of minutes. The sloshing sound was also accompanied by clanks of metal (soldiers' gear?) and the sound of fabric rustling. I have never ran so fast with a rucksack before, or since. ---------------------------------- Successfully avoiding adult responsibility since 1978!