steve1

Akago, I work as a school counselor. Each day I work with kids who are angry as hell because they have faced abuse and neglect since birth. The main message they receive in life, is that they are "no good". Someone who has never grown up in this kind of home may not understand the pain and emptiness that goes along with it. I honestly feel that the best thing that someone in such a situation can do, when they are old enough, is to get away from their dysfunctional abusive parents. It often takes a life time to repair the damage that has been done, but it's important to realize it is possible to recover. In my own situation, my father never gave me credit for much of anything. I used to drive myself crazy trying to succeed at things, just to get his acceptance. No matter what I did it didn't amount to crap in his mind, and he never failed to remind me that I wasn't worth anything in his eyes. Exercise and hard work helped burn off some of this anger, but I did so many at risk things that I guess I'm lucky to still be here. I finally came to the conclusion that I was never going to get his acceptance, so why bother. If you have noone in your life who is building you up and telling you are worth something, learn to do it for yourself. Tell yourself what you need to hear, and take care of yourself. I know this is difficult if you have always been surrounded by negativity. There are toxic parents out there who don't deserve your respect. I don't think that forgiveness is always a necessary ingredient to recover. Sure I understand why my "Old Man" was so abusive. That was how he was raised. But today he is still a drunk, still a pervert, and he has no remorse over the harm he has done. He doesn't need my love, he has his bottle. Why should I let someone like this harm my own kids? What works for me is to have a very long distant relationship with him. Steve1

I met a guy back in the 70's who started jumping. He had lost one of his legs due to bone cancer and he did his best to skydive. He finally had to quit though because the landings were just too brutal under round canopies. He kept injuring his only leg ankle and foot. He had all of our respect though. He'd ride a bike all over town, snow ski, kayak, and even skydive, all with one leg. A couple years later he started calling up all his jump buddies to say goodbye. His exact words were, "I'm about to go on the ultimate trip." He was actually joking about his own impending death. Apparently the cancer was spreading throughout the rest of his body. A short while later he died. I'd like to think, I had that kind of guts when my time comes. Steve1

AkaGQ, If I was you I'd try to spend as little time as possible around your Old Man. It's probably true that he's not going to change, but if he makes you feel like crap, the hell with him. I've got a father whose never been much more than perverted old drunk. To tell you the truth I was about ready to toss him thru a window Christmas Eve when he was saying totally inappropriate things to my daughters while drunk as usual out of his mind. I keep asking myself why I even bother with him. Sure I know he is one sick son-of-a-bitch, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let him pass on his dysfunction onto my family. I know you're supposed to forgive, but I also think a person will do that when they are ready. I find that if I put as much space as possible between he and I, I am a lot happier and a whole lot saner. Steve1

Bill, Talk about twisted thinking. No wonder so many people hate Americans. I sent some Christmas cards this year that actually said "Peace on Earth and Goodwill to All". I guess this is a sign of weakness, and I should have checked with the government first to see if it was appropriate or not. Steve1

Deuce, I hope to jump with you someday. Have a Merry Christmas. Steve1

Rhino, Have a Merry Christmas. You deserve a good one. Steve1

Isn't it great to be back! I'm kind of going through withdrawal myself, right now, waiting for warmer months so I can jump again. I'd love to head South. Steve1

Michelle, What a great idea and gift to your Dad! My oldest daughter has been making some collages of old pictures. Some of them are hilarious and others make you want to cry. They definitely are better than any gift you could find in a store. Steve1

Sorry for your loss RiggerRob. What a terrible accident! Steve1

I got a new set of K-2 shaped skiis. Seeing as how I can't jump right now I figured I might as well try to kill myself by going fast down a hill. I get my jollies by going way faster than I should. Lot's of fun but it still doesn't compare to skydiving. My daughters found a deal on snowboards, so it's been fun going up on the mountain together. Yesterday my oldest daughter got hung up on the T-bar and was drug quite a ways up the hill before the damn thing stopped. She did shed a few tears, but she's no quitter. We're gonna give it hell again tomorrow. Steve1

SkyPuppy, I haven't seen those pictures in 30 years. I guess it was a two way going through a canopy rather than a single jumper. Although my memory is fading, I still recall the sound affects of screeching tires and tearing material that went with that scene. I'd love to watch that movie again. Steve1

I think I remember this one, but my CRS disease has taken a turn for the worse. Did it have a scene where a jumper goes through another canopy in slow motion? There was also a scene of some people at a par-ski meet, and another scene where some gal was kyssing some guy in a motorcycle helmet after landing. (I still remember all the good parts). At any rate if that is the movie, I watched it about a 1,000 times back in the 70's. Steve1

I hope she never finds out where all those racing stripes are coming from. I'll really be in deep dodo if she does. And Goose I think I will try crying uncontrollably. I mean whatever works, and I am a pretty good actor. I wish I had known more of these tricks when I was younger. Think of all the women I could have had. I mean this is really valuable info. you folks are contributing, and I'm really learning a lot. I may even write my own outer space book. Steve1

I finally figured out what the real source of the problem is. Yes, the mystery is solved. It's the wrong time of the month!! I just got the news. I guess I should have known. The signs were all there: extreme grumpiness over the littlest things, a lot of frowning, tremendous mood swings, etc. Why is it that women can't be nice all the time like us men folk. Steve1

I've got a really nice black lab who really needed a bath. He's a super bird dog and family pet, but he has this bad habit of rolling in shit and he was starting to stink to high heaven. So last night, when the wife was gone, I decided to give him a bath. Since it was colder than hell outside, I decided the best place would be inside the house in our new jacuzzi tub. So I fixed old Bro a nice bubble bath and proceeded to wash off the layers of stink. Bro loved every minute of it. He almost fell asleep as I scrubbed away on him. I don't know what it is about old dogs, but I ended up with black hair everywhere. I figured if my wife saw a few black hairs it wouldn't be any big deal. Since she is a brunette I'd just blame it on her. The only trouble was she came how early and spotted what was going on. I'm starting to wonder if old Bro has mange or something, because there was hair everywhere. Well as things ended up I almost had to move into Bro's kennel last night to find a place to sleep. The wife says the only person she knows who would be stupid enough to give a dog a bath in a new jacuzzi tub is my brother. I was thinking of asking Anne Landers for advice on this one, but I was wondering what you would do in a case like this. Should I move in with Bro or should I do what I usually do and plead insanity and beg for forgiveness. Steve1

One dog, one cat, and two horses. Steve1

I still have people who shake their head at me and tell me, "that just doesn't look right" when I psycho-pack. I'm the only one at three different DZ's where I jump who packs this way. All I know is that it's fast, goes into the bag neatly, and I get nice on heading openings with it. I never would have started packing this way if it hadn't been for these forums and people recommending it. I learned how to pack this way by looking at a couple different web sights. I made the extension myself with my wife's sewing machine and a narrow piece of nylon. I haven't noticed any signs of canopy damage. Try it. You'll like it. Steve1

Happy Birthday Sonny. If you think 30 is bad wait till you hit 50. If I knew I was gonna live that long I would have taken better care of myself. Steve1

Sebazz, I'm just wondering how you got a picture of my little woman. She says she wants to jump and I told her you were a tandem Master, so maybe next summer at Lost Prairie.......Steve1

One thing that is nice about a smaller DZ is that often you will be asked to jump with more experienced jumpers just to fill out a load. I've jumped with and received free coaching from some world class jumpers just because they were short on jumpers that day, and they couldn't find anyone else to jump with. Later as my skills improved I was still often asked to jump with them. I'm sure this wouldn't happen much at a bigger D.Z. Steve1

I took SkyMonkeyOne's advice and got a bag one size larger. I also Psycho-pack now which has helped greatly as far as getting the canopy quickly and neatly into the bag. Steve1

Dave, I went through S.F. training back in the early 70's. A friend that I trained with got sick of all the B.S. in our Guard Unit (19th S.F.) and went regular Army. After his tour of duty he went to work for someone in Africa. I'm not sure what he was doing, but I imagine it was training personnel and running missions with them. In other words he was working as a mercenary soldier. He survived all that and returned to Smoke Jumping here in Montana. Let's hope you are doing something safer than that. Best of luck, Steve1

Bill Von is my hero.......Congratulations again, and thanks for all the great updates. Steve1

David Poczynek, This is way off the subject, but I can see from your background info. that you are posting from Saudi, Arabia. I was just wondering if you are still in S.F. Do you know SkyMonkey-one. Steve1

I'd like to grow new hair on my head where it all fell out. I also need corrected vision and hearing. My teeth are kind of crooked and far from pearly white. Having a more intelligent twinkle in my eyes would also be nice. I have CRS disease real bad, and can even hide my own Easter eggs now. Maybe I just need to order up a complete new head. Not to mention my other body parts that need work. Steve1