peacefuljeffrey

I know, right?! "You're such a sweet guy, some day you'll find the woman who's perfect for you!" If I'm so wonderful, and you're not toppin' me off with bullshit, then why the fuck ain't YOU interested in me? I'm wonderful, right? You said so yourself. You must be one of those women who is desperate for some self-absorbed asshole to shit on you, so you can complain to your similar friends about how you can't find a "nice guy." I'm with ya, dude. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

Here is your problem bud. I'm sorry, but guys that girls describe as NICE almost never get described by them as anything else. And their friends are nice. You can be nice, just don't make it your defining trait. Most nice guys lack confidence and that is what women are looking for, wether they admit it or not. Don't be a prick, but don't be nice either. It may sound counter intuitive, but if being nice hasn't worked so far, you may think about changing it. I dunno. That sounds too much like, "Be a person who is not who you are." I don't even begin to know how I would manage doing that. The first part of what you said here makes sense to me, but not the last part. -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

This is good advice. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

Short answer: No. Long answer: I find it hard to tell for sure, and even though I am confident about who I am, and that I am a good person (and would be a good boyfriend/have been in the past), I often lack the confidence that would enable me to feel, "Sure, she likes me!" There is a fine line between really knowing that you've gotten a signal from a girl, and just wishful thinking that a thing she said or did or gestured expressed "interest." I tend to need to be beaten over the head with it. I have missed signals before. The girl I dated this weekend, she gave me what I thought were signals. She works at a Nutrition World. I was there to pick up TVP for some vegetarian chili I was making, and she helped me find it. I offered to bring some in for her to try, once it was made that weekend, and she said sure, that'd be nice. So I did. And we stood at the cashier counter of the store, and chatted, and ate my chili, and laughed about a lot of stuff, and she shared her mangoes and honeydew with me. I told her I'd like to see her again, asked about seeing a movie or something, got an, "I'd like to do that." So I came by again on Saturday, but instead of seeing a movie, we just hung out at a local restaurant and had a beer and dessert, and talked for a lonnnng time, enjoying learning about each other's backgrounds. Made plans to go visit the local zoo the next day. (It was too soon, I felt, to offer to take her flying or skydiving. Too much trust to ask right away. Am I right?) So plans were made to go to the zoo, then for Thai food afterward. Sunday morning comes a phone call about being tired but about to get on the road to meet me at my house (which I'd cleaned a bit for her to feel comfortable). Asked to cancel the Thai food plan because of a recovered memory about meeting her friends for a concert downtown. So at this point I'm starting to get the sense that she is not into a date, and wants to downshift the nature of this day's plans. Well, we went to the zoo, had a nice enough time, but she seemed a little distant. Got back to my house, about a block away, and she lets me have it: "You're a really nice guy and I like you" ("There's a 'BUT' comin', right?!") "BUT..." "I'm going through a divorce right now..." !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So anyway, after that, we sat by my landlady's pool, ordered pizza in, talked for a long while, still got along well, expressed feelings (yes, we like each other, yes that way, but things are, needless to say, a little complicated right now?)... It went from 4 o'clock to 7 o'clock really quickly, and she mentioned that she was pretty tired and ought to head home. I realized that she hadn't said anything about going to meet her friends for the downtown concert, and she said, "Oh, that would have been at 3:30!" I apologized for keeping her from it, and she assured me that she had made her own decision to stay with me. Well, that was nice to hear, anyway.

Maybe you and Peacefuljeffrey should hook-up...? He's got a thing for feet...... ~R+R... Well, you know, he sure does like the rest of a woman as well! (not limited to the physical, either!) Thanks for the plug! LOL!

If it did, then I'd be surrounded with hot women who love me for being a nice guy. Instead, all they do is think of me as a sweet person. And then they go and have relationships and all the great sex with other people instead. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

Suh-WEEET! Which Rush? -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

You are dating the wrong kind of woman or women. Make sure that you are asking out women, who like you and generally want to be with you. If a person really likes you, then the person will do just about anything possible to keep the date. Frankly, I don't see that as very good advice. MOST OF THE PROBLEM [I]IS[/I] IN TRYING TO "KNOW" IF THE WOMAN "LIKES YOU" AND "GENERALLY WANTS TO BE WITH YOU"!! If we were so good at being able to tell (or if women were any good at indicating) that they liked us, we would not have 90% of the difficulty we have! The dating is USED to determine if she likes us and wants to be with us. We can't possibly really know that BEFORE we select this woman to date! -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

I too look forward to hearing the answer to this one. It's not exactly what happened to me, but if it does, I'd like to know why it did. Instead, I went on a date with a girl who ended up telling me that she likes me and would go out with me (she seemed unequivocal about that) except for the fact that she is about to divorce her HUSBAND. (She expressed her apology and regret at not mentioning THAT situation sooner!) Why the fuck is it so hard to find someone to fall in love with and have it be uncomplicated and true? I am not a bad guy, in fact I'm a rather GOOD guy, and I know I deserve it and would be worthy of it. Instead I get to deal with this kind of head-screw. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

Yeah... I was pretty pleased with myself that I didn't fuck it all up and tip my hand, and maybe make him rethink my readiness. The flight went fine! (And this was the instructor I almost crashed on final with one time. Needless to say I'm a bit more conscientious about my airspeed on final ever since then! We bounced pretty freakin' hard, despite him ramming in the throttle when he realized we were prolly gonna stall from 100 feet or so!) -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

"Don't touch that. Don't even look at that!" I'm at about a 1, I think. Nothin' to be hard about right now, being that I'm at work. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

SEND US BACK OUR SKYVAN!!!!!!![/I] -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

RIP Yes. Dude was freakin' FUNNY!! -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

Actually, it's not music, it's comedy by Mitch Hedberg. But here's what my iTunes says I listened to most recently: Pink Floyd Bush Van Halen U2 Temple of the Dog Boxelder (a local Jupiter, FL band that's EXCELLENT!) Rusted Root Stone Temple Pilots Led Zeppelin Bob Seger Supertramp Rush Soundgarden Jethro Tull Gun and Roses Sheryl Crow Sting Joan Osborne Collective Soul -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

That's cool. Mine did it similarly. We had been up for about an hour, with him talking me through the pattern work. He looked at me and (in his French-German accent) asked me, "Do you think you can do it without me?" I said yes, but all I thought he meant was that he would shut up and not talk me through it! So we landed and he told me to pull to the side of the taxiway. That's when he told me that he would get out and I should do one full-stop landing and come back around! I was so suprised, but elated; and since I didn't want to blow it by seeming underconfident, I had to seamlessly pretend that I had known what he meant all along. So I dropped him off, and each time I flew the pattern and landed, he had me go back around and do another, until I had done 3-5 landings. He just stood there on the grass beside the taxiway at Brookhaven Airport (on L.I.). Solo flying was one of the best feelings in my life! (Well, still is.) -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

Congratulations!

I'm sick of: Radar Love Young Lust (from The Wall) Take the Money and Run and any other classic rock songs that the radio stations seem to think we need to hear 1000 times a week. There are so many great songs by great bands, but they select like the "top three" of each band and that's all they'll play. I've pretty much given up on radio. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

That reminds me, you never did post pics of YOUR FEET in that thread you started way back when, did you?! And I wanted so bad to see them! Now you and Sunny should both post pics of these cute feet you have!

I'd go for the ass. I've never really been a boob man, although I have noticed a gradual increase in how much I appreciate both as time has gone by. But to me it's almost irrelevant. I mostly go for faces, because a pretty or cute face can more than compensate for breasts or ass that is not spectacular. Also very important is the fact that I go crazy about if a girl has pretty feet. They can win me over pretty easily. Most polls, though, don't ask guys to choose between ass, breasts or feet! They'd win, hands-down, with me. A woman who is comfortable with that, with me liking her feet as much as her other beautiful parts, is a gem, to me. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

I'm trying to help you with that problem.... Anyhoo, my bestest asset is my feet. Yeah... now yer just teasin' me!! No, seriously -- are your feet really that nice?

It doesn't make you a traitor to go to other DZs. No DZ "owns" you or your business. You are a consumer, and they are companies. If they are run by reasonable people, then those people will understand that all DZs have different things to offer -- different aircraft, scenery, people, facilities, challenges, discipline concentrations. For one DZ to expect that you will always come there and only there to skydive would be, in my opinion, very unreasonable. I got chided for going to Z-Hills for a weekend, but it was in fun, not in earnest. They know, where I jump regularly, that I love them and the place very much. You owe it to no one but yourself, to skydive where you feel comfortable and have a good time. How could you be expected to grow as a skydiver if you simply sat at one DZ and waited for experiences and new people to come your way? What if they never arrived? So go out and jump where you wish. If you have to, articulate to people you deal with the fact that you just wish to see what is around out there. Oh, by the way, my first impulse when you said you have three DZs within an hour drive was, "BEEEYATCH!!" -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

See: -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

It's a mistake, though, to forget that there are guys out here who actually like non-huge boobs. I am one. I don't like tremendous, pendulous ones; I don't really even like large. I like small to medium, and find those to be hot! There are disconnects, often, between what a woman wants to be liked for, and what she may be liked for by her guy. She may want to be noticed for her boobs, but then her legs and ass are what drives a guy nuts. What about a woman who has it "all" but then is bugged because that's all guys notice about her and don't notice that she is intelligent, funny, articulate, etc.? Besides, most women think ill of their feet, and forget that there are those of us around who think those can be pretty, too! Feet aren't even on the list, but I KNOW that there are dropzone.com women who have pretty ones! So, there is no accounting for taste. Hopefully, between a man and a woman, they can just generally find each other attractive in a general, overall way which makes it unnecessary for one or the other to be all crazy about one particular (or two particular) part(s). Well that, at least, is good to read.

I think that's crap, and I completely disagree. Just because a person doesn't jump four days a week, that doesn't mean he/she can't have learned, and be continuing to learn, safe skydiving technique and habits. It's all about where your head is at. If you care about safety, you make sure to learn about safety. Isn't it completely possible that some dude who jumps six days a week might be reinforcing bad, ego-feeding, dangerous habits? Many of our "dangerous" jumpers, the ones who burn in doing dangerous things, are people who jump frequently, are they not? Nothing axiomatically links jumping more than just on weekends with being a safer skydiver. -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

I am one of the so-far blessed ones. I have never had a friend go in. I have had a few bust up their legs, though. I still have them to see and talk with, and believe me, as much as I am able to I avoid taking it all for granted. I know and accept that I may not remain this lucky forever. But believe me, being in the sport about two years with no major losses can make a guy feel like surely something is keeping tragedy at bay. One does not want to face the fact that it is almost surely not the case. One thing I do know is that I opt to avoid using alcohol or drugs to help me through things like loss of loved ones. I see that as a pit to fall into, and a habit that could form and become quite destructive, piling damage on top of loss. So I just put myself into a state of deep thought and introspection when I have thinking, and sorting out of feelings, that I need to do. Time takes care of it. Blue skies, -Jeffrey -Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"