Whiskeyboi

So...I've got a Sunday with no work to do. Since work allows me little to no creative outlet, methinks it's time to write something. But what? Once the juices are flowing, there's no stopping me. But picking a topic...that's the hard part. SO...suggestions? I'm best with parody, cynicism, black comedy. Favorite projects are parody songs (a la Weird Al...but um...more dark usually). My best achievement to date is probably the Helen Keller Musical - "Around the Block in 80 Days". Any thoughts would be appreciated. Since I'm a recovering Catholic, it's not like I'll be in church.

Regardless of your gender - if you've been used and spit out before...you'll relate. Youtube has a live version, but the album cut is pretty mellow. Goes good with Jameson. http://www.myspace.com/wwwmyspacecomjanisian All Those Promises (Janis Ian) I don’t need to know her name It’s enough for me to know she is I know she is not to blame Did you tell her you were free after all you said to me? And all those promises that you made and left behind were filled with emptiness You were never really mine Every sweet caress was just your second best Broken promises Baby, I’m amazed at how long I still believed How many lies it takes before someone like me sees All the tears you cry never can deny that you make love a lie All the tears you cry they never could deny that you make love a lie So when you see her, hold her tight Don’t forget to whisper in her ear When she wakes alone at night holding only memories maybe she will think of me And all those promises that you made me from the start were filled with emptiness from the desert of your heart Every sweet caress was just your second best Broken promises Baby, I’m amazed at how long I still believed How many lies it takes before someone like me sees All the tears you cried they never could deny that you made love a lie All those tears you cried They never could deny that you made love a lie

It's getting late, I can't sleep, and none of the countless books on my shelves seem to suit the moment. Anyone got some creative writing they can share? Insert your creative works here...help keep an insomniac awake...I'll start with some tripe I wrote years ago... -------------------------------------------------- Awakenings she lay next to him the one that she loved sun shining through the blinds hangover headache thumping wildly sweaty sheets and tossed pillows twisted limbs from a night of passion feeling complete, yet spent cigarette butts strewn in the ashtray garbage pail filled with unspeakables she opens her eyes to see her lover how he moved her, made her cry with delight she rolled on her side and stroked his chest wanting to feel the heat reborn she kissed his cheek lightly and then asked herself quietly... "how long has he been dead?"

Is it possible to have sex with one person for the rest of your life? Wait...one OTHER person, right? Cause I was gonna say...I don't like myself THAT much...

The Fair Credit Reporting Act sort of dictates a lot with debt collection/reporting. Most states have a not-for-profit agency you can call or e-mail with questions like this...(not the sketchy places with TV commercials...) http://www.ftc.gov/os/statutes/031224fcra.pdf

Hmmm...interesting thread...let's take a look around... Nope...nothing to see here...

And THAT right there...is why I'm an accounting major...

Hmmm...there a lot of ear drum plunctures happening these days? Credibility immediately goes out the window when you can't even spell. Get a dictionary...or try spell-check, you douche...

See?!?!? I told ya Gallagher was a p*ssy...

You gotta admit...if THAT were on the boxes at the Office Depot, Swingline would sell a lot more units...

Someone's gonna have to clue me in on what these Boogies are all about... (Then again, I can barely tie my own shoes...)

I introduced myself to a stranger at the DZ this weekend by smacking her arse... Then again, I WAS dared to do it. Then again, I didn't FORMALLY introduce myself to her until later when the group had drinks. Um...yeah...disregard...

You know, I'm slightly disappointed with the above responses. Isn't one of the things that makes this country great the freedom to express oneself? The freedom to have and make choices? This music might not strike a chord with my spirit, but I will defend the rights of others to enjoy and appreciate it. Now - if you'll excuse me, the sacrifices are ready. There is work to be done...so much work to be done...

...like some evil bird of prey the scaffold spreads its wings the people build their fires and bolt their doors... we playing name that tune?

I'll buy you one if you end up at SDC...

And then, when you've left and are in the parking lot, identify which car is hers...remove the gas cap...take about 15 packets of sugar...

Hence the reason for my playing a throwback version. Sort of my way of boycotting Hasbro... Sigh...you can always cut me in half and try to count the rings...

It's one you have to log into and leave running. There used to be a really good e-mail one in the 90's but it only worked with dial-up. (Damn...showing my age again.) I miss those old e-games. They had a kick-ass version of Battleship as well. If you're into old-skool, bootleg-looking but effective software, I say give it a try. For something that looks like it should be asking Matthew Broderick if he wants to play globalthermonuclear war, it's not bad. (The "send sounds" or "ASCII art" feature is a particular fav. of mine.) Other alternative is to shell out 10 bucks for the older official editions of Scrabble (like 2003). You can play over the net, but not e-mail. Again...not that I have any experience with Scrabble or anything...

My online Scrabble engine of choice would be http://www.isc.ro/ You can play for free, or pay for a few extras (that you won't need.) It supports multiple dictionaries too (for those of you across the pond.) I love this one because there is just something so Commodore 64/TRS-80/Dos 2.0 about it...reminds me of one database we use at work. I mean...not like I play scrabble or anything. Or have read the OED.

Can you narrow it down by state or region of the country? The database i'm in makes you choose...

I was expecting one of those bogus games...like the ads for haunted houses i've seen... but this was actually real. and as an ovinaphobe (see some other post i wrote) this was quite refreshing...

I was saving myself for marriage. Then I realized no woman would be dumb enough to marry me and gave up... Always keep a spare set of car keys in the bowl by the door...

Hmmm...now what if it had been beer-soaked grass?

Pffft...in my neighbourhood, more like 15 minutes of coaching...

She probably gives bad shoulders anyway...