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Bill, Hope you're feeling better. Get well, God bless, and Merry Christmas !!!!!! Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Long ago, 1980 to be exact. Rigger "didn't like" the diaper on my round reserve. But instead of refusing to pack it, which was his right, he packed it anyway, signed the card "Freddy Frappacker", entered a date that was already out of date, and kept my $10. Needless to say, I took my business elsewhere after that. But there was a big boogie that weekend, so right there at gear check I penciled in a pack entry using the name of a friend who died after his reserve streamered. The gear check guy thought this was hysterically funny and slapped the aprroval thingy on my harness. Sometimes I really miss the old days..... Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I was 25 and was driving home from a Monday night class when I heard. About 2 years later I learned that one of my childhood friends had been one of the cops who had responded to the call for a shooting at the Dakota. He saw Lennon lying on the ground and says he knew then & there that Lennon was a goner. They (the cops) decided not to wait for an ambulance and loaded him into the back seat of one of the squad cars for a desperate race to the ER at Roosevelt Hospital. He and his partner remained behind to take Mark Chapman into custody. As Chapman was an out-of-towner who had come a long way to kill one of NYC's leading citizens, they gave him an appropriate beating, which was repeated at the Precinct station house. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Ill get flamed for this, but I think there should be laws about our instruction. Were not playing scrabble. Lisa, you've been around here long enough to know that we know you're real people, we're not gonna flame you. And no, we're not playing scrabble either, the situation you're describing is really wrong. This is one of the reasons USPA has affiliated dropzones that at least try their best to adhere to USPA's Basic Safety Regulations and Safety & Training programs. When people ask me what to look for, I tell them for a minimum to look for USPA affiliation and some documentation that their staff holds USPA ratings. It's sort of like asking somebody to show you a driver's license. Having a driver's license doesn't mean they're a good driver, but it does mean they at least met some minimums to get a license. And then again, believe it or not, there are some excellent jump operations that are NOT USPA affiliates, notably the Parachute Center in Lodi, CA, which has an excellent reputation, to name just one. But by and large, people should look for USPA and run to the nearest exit if they can't find it, because without USPA they don't know what they're getting. But laws ? NO, never ! All you have to do is take a look around at what a mess they've made of the rest of this country, do you really want those same lecherous fatass Congresswhatevers running your dropzone as well ? Because I'll tell you what they'll do, they'll shut you down flat. Because of National Security, because it's for your own good, and because they've heard rumors about drug use at some dropzones. And because some developer wants to sprout another strip mall on the property. If it ever gets to that, then God and the Second Amendment help us all. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Not with other jumpers. I'll tell a whuffo I'm getting close to 800, but to another jumper it's 779 and won't slide to 780 until I make the next one. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Not sure about the eighties, but in the seventies I thought a Wonderhog at $320 was outrageous when most other rigs were going for $240'ish. Strato Stars were $549, and a good National Bias LoPo reserve went for $365 if I recall. Nobody used AADs, so that was a wash. My Silly Suit cost something like $90 and I thought THAT was pure highway robbery. Ditto for the $10 prices to 12,500 that went into effect in 1980. What the fuck, did they think we were MADE out of money ?!? Reserve repacks went from $5 to $10 when the FAA changed the rules from 60 to 120 days and anybody who suggested paying somebody else to pack their main for them would've been pelted with beer bottles - and not all of them would've been empty bottles either. Sky sports ain't cheap - never have been & never will be. It's all a matter of setting your priorities. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I've always heard that Texas was gun friendly. Arizona too, or else I'm behind the times. I had no idea the Nazis ran Illinois though. I knew there were "Illinois Nazis", because the Blues Brothers HATE Illinois Nazis, but I didn't realize they'd taken over. Are there large populations being deported to slave labor and death camps ??? Are children, especially twins, being used as guinea pigs in horrifying medical experiments ? Well, ARE there ??? If not, go light on the "Nazi" bullshit. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Of course if you say no, the cops will get a warrant and then deliberately trash your house. So once you've said no, get on the damn phone and call every eagle eye award winning news TV station in town and have them camped out on your doorstep when the cops come back - it MIGHT save your grandmother's wedding picture in the livingroom from being smashed to pieces. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Way to go man, I can say the same after 26 years. Sometimes the thought of never having a young woman again in my life spooks me a little, but my wife is the best and the only one. And she loves it as much as I do. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Sam Adams. Or, if you can get a deal on it, try Harp. It's brewed by Guiness and is good enough for the beer snobs (like me), but it's also light and piss colored enough for most Americans. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I didn't know Borat was a skydiver too, that's waaay cool !!! Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Depends on what you mean by "the end". The sun exploding would be the definitive end to end all ends. But as that's not expected for another 4 billion years, it's sort of difficult to imagine humanity living that long. I mean the dinosaurs might have had tiny brains (or not), but they lived for hundreds of millions of years. I'd call them a highly successful species until they got creamed by that pesky meteor. Whether or not we could go on living that long as a species is highly questionable, considering the drastic changes to the environment our population growth and technologies are creating. And then apart from that, we could just as easily be creamed by yet another meteor and find ourselves as helpless as the dinosaurs, only with a better understanding of just how doomed we'd be. If you believe in the Bible and Book of Revelations, two surefire signs to watch out for would be the rebuilding of Solomon's Temple in Jerusalem, the other being a scheme to imbed microchips in people's foreheads or wrists in place of money. The chilling thing about the microchips is that they'd make such good sense, especially in preventing identity theft in a cashless society. Anyone who refused them for "silly" religious beliefs would be immediately suspect, as they must be supporting themselves somehow and by definition illegally. Hmmmm.... Of course for the more traditional among us, stepping off the curb in front of a city bus will do just fine, as well as taking too long trying to fix a spun up canopy. They're all just as final, so take your pick. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Rumsfeld, Rumsfeld....oh, wait a minute! Wasn't he the guy who said something like "It could take six days or six weeks, I doubt it would take six months" ? Are we talking about the same guy ? Or maybe you mean the guy who said we shouldn't call it an insurrection anymore because that would just glorify the enemy as some kind of insurrectionists. Nice hat he wore to the Army-Navy game. So uh, what was your question ? Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Attorney Kenneth Starr, the former Whitewater prosecutor who investigated President Clinton's relationship with White House intern Monica Lewinsky, is representing the school board. Well, there you have it. The man's specialty is making mountains out of molehills and he's found the perfectly silly excuse to do it again. Too bad nobody got a blowjob this time.... Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Mike you're very lucky. Another guy like you (even had the same name) hooked it in and died up at Taft in October. I may sound old fashioned, but 125 jumps is WAY too soon to be fooling with 90 degree front riser turns. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I have one question about your rig, is your canopy attached with soft loop or metal connectors to your risers ? And do you have standard or 1 in. skinny risers ? There's been some discussion both here and in Parachutist Magazine about sliders jamming up steering lines and contributing to some hairy situations and even fatalities (like our own Freefly Hol here at these Forums). Your situation with BOTH steering lines jamming up is the most unusual one I've heard of - so naturally it had to happen on a night jump. Glad things turned out for you, the best learning experiences are the ones that leave you in one piece after a good scare. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

You're not the only one that feels that way!!! My first jumps were on a hornet, and I would buy one in a heart beat if some one had a new one in a back room somewhere. Try calling Ralph Hatfield in Oregon (the "Call Ralph!" guy), he's still advertising for Hornets. I demoed some Sabre2's and wasn't terribly impressed. I've been jumping a 210 Pilot for the last two years and absolutely love it. The openings are every bit as soft as a Spectre and I've NEVER had a canopy with a longer glide. Sometimes in light to zero winds I have to get on my fronts to keep from overshooting the landing zone. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I'm not going to sort through 16 pages of comments, so will keep this short. I HAD thought this incident was an overreaction, until I heard on NPR this morning (you always get more of the facts from NPR) that the six had purchased one way tickets with cash, had boarded without luggage, and sought to change seat assignments from tourist class to first class after boarding. I would regard that as highly suspicious behavior, with or without the prayers. Fuck 'em, I'm on the "no fly list" myself (no end of trouble with that, I guess there are too many "Tom Brown terrorists" running loose in this world - I won't even THINK about trying to fly with my rig !) and I'm an American who used to work for Boeing. If you're going to act like a bunnch of weirdos, you're going to get kicked off the plane, and good for the Pilot for making the call. Period. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Knowing the diseases a guy would get, who in his right mind would touch the likes of a Pamela Anderson? Or a Carmen Electra? Just looking at a picture of Paris Hilton makes me want to go to a clinic for a shot. That's what wetsuits are made for. I think the whole lot of 'em should do public service for six months in a whorehouse in some South American mining community. Compared to Britney, I'm surprised how Paris looks almost modest. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Yup, January '77 it hit glare ice on the runway and skidded into the tetrahedron. I was onboard when it happened. By the grace of God, that was the ONE time we ever took off kneeling up and facing forward, usually we'd sit in each other's laps facing aft. That tetrahedron came through the side like a knife, tearing up the wooden deck and it cleaned the legs off my brand new jumpsuit and blue jeans underneath. I had light scratches on my shins. If I'd been sitting the usual way I'd have been cut in half. We had two first jump students onboard who STILL wanted to jump, so myself, the students, and a JM named Mary Todd, who was in the Air Force at the time got a Cessna load organized. We went up, Mary put the students out and we got a quick hookup & kiss pass from 3500 ft - with my shredded jeans flapping in the winter winds. The Beaver flew again after some structural repair to the airframe. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Steppenwolf, in Rochester, NY in 1969. A month later I got to see Janis Joplin. I could give a damn about Steppenwolf, but Janis was like a human volcano, especially 'cuz I was just thirteen. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

To the tune of Paul McCartney's "Silly Love Songs": You'd think skydivers would've had enough of punching craters, I look around me and I see it isn't so, Some skygods want to fill the world with ugly craters, And what's wrong with them, I need to know, Cuz here one goes, agaaaaaiiiiiiin..... (my original unfinished tune) or else to the tune of John Denver's "Thank God I'm a Country Boy", we'd shriek at the top of our lungs, then sing "Thank God my reserve deployed !". Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

Have no idea about nowadays, but I remember the Beaver we had at Seneca Falls, NY from 1976 'til beyond 1978, which was the last time I saw it on my way west. We usually didn't take it above 7500 ft very often, not with full loads anyway, though by '78 it was flying full loads to 8500 and that was mostly it. I remember it as a very loud plane, but in all fairness so are Skyvans. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I'd suggest doing things like: a) Throw oneself out of the plane a few times at a still comfortable altitude and hopefully find that it doesn't take very long to confirm that one is stable to pull, or that even with just throwing oneself out, it doesn't take long to get stable, belly to the wind, before the pull. b) Work one's way down in exit altitude when one has the chance, until comfortable down to say 2500'. c) Run the freefall numbers to remind oneself how little altitude is lost in the first few seconds (eg, CSPA charts show only 138 ft in 3 sec.) Very sensible and realistic. In older days we used to do hop & pops under cloud ceilings at 2 grand with rounds and older squares that opened a lot faster than today's canopies. Nowadays, even with my Pilot, I'd still jump from 2 grand if that was all I could get. But with a Cypres, I personally wouldn't go lower, because I always board the plane with my AAD turned on and don't want to mess around with somebody trying to shut the thing off from over my shoulder. From an exit below 2000 ft, I'm not sure whether I might have a 2 out situation, which is something I hope I don't ever have. That said, an exit from 2000 ft still leaves you as much, or more time than a terminal deployment between 2500 - 3000 ft. And though the opening may take more time, it still takes less distance. Your approach of working your way down to, and getting comfy with 2500 is a sensible approach. Those of us who started on static line have always been more comfortable with the lower altitudes, since they were always our baseline. But people learn better in gradual steps, rather than having "the truth" rubbed in their faces, so I think taking hop & pops down in 500 ft increments at least down to 2500 ft is a good idea. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

I didn't read the whole damn thing because anything that can't be said in 250 words or less should be rewritten. But there was an innerestin' editorial in today's Sunday Orange County Register. It contrasted the sixty year old Palestinian grandmother of 48 grandkids who blew herself up as a suicide bomber with the new Archbishop of the American Episcopal Church, a woman who claims not to be upset about the loss of Episcopal membership because they're supposedly into population control. The editorial concluded that we're fucked. As a conflicted Episcopalian, I have to agree. We're going to have to kill an awful lot of those people, including the grandmas, because they sure as hell want to kill us. Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !