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Everything posted by splat123
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Waiting for rush of cheap V4's in the classifieds
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A MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except North Dakota, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect: ----------------------- 1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary'). ------------------------ 2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.' ------------------- 3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. ----------------- 4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse. ---------------------- 5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public. ---------------------- 6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour. -------------------- 7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it. ------------------- 8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar. ------------------- 9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion. --------------------- 10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialect in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater. --------------------- 11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). --------------------- 12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries. -------------------- 13.. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad. ----------------- 14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776). --------------- 15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season. God Save the Queen!
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but very chuffed with the rest of it
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Just got my new wings container that was ordered with wingsuit bridle. It measures 7' 4" from pin to pilotchute attach piont & 8' 9" to deployment pud. Not sure if they have given me right bridle, but on my PF shadow probaly not a issue.
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I just want to learn to fly my shadow like that, crazy carving moves !!
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Failed level one AFF "Exit-weak count Body position-must straighten legs + get knees up. Lazy legs, knee down. No practice touches, had to be prompted. DO IT AGAIN ! " Had half a dozen static line jumps before so canopy control ok.
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Gutted !! Thought I might finally get something useful from here
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Cheers Simon, that's the b'day present from the mrs sorted
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If I get the standard model (without paralog) will I still be able to view my flights on PC ? Not much of computer geek & really want it to improve body position, but would be nice to log times etc.
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Can anybody tell me if a pd pulse 150, manufactured 2/2011 will have had the new line mods for the breaks ?
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Jeb you mentioned that next generation will have sound feet back. Will it be software update or we will have to buy second one? + 1
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Thanks again dragon2
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Seen very reasonable priced d70s for sale, some with lenses. What lens would you recommend for jumping ? (wingsuit pics) I have a couple of nikkor lenses for general pics & thought I'd be better spending money on the glass & not the body, budget is tight ! Am I right in thinking with the d70s you can get a straight plug in bite/blow switch ?
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Not sure if Campos has CRB check for kid's Real wingsuiters have abs, pecs & huge package.
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The mother inlaw MKI winguit. Power ranger suit from ebay, bit of red material & sowing machine. Job done
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Thanks Dragon 2 Regards Kev
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I know these lenses are no good for jumping, but want to try dslr camera for general pics & maybe jumping once I get a feel for it.
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Got a old, almost unused F65 with AF Nikkor 28-100mm & AF Nikkor 70-300mm lenses. Will these lenses work with later dslr cameras ?
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http://www.amazon.com/Rokinon-FE8M-N-Fisheye-Nikon-Black/dp/B002LTWDSK Have no skill to make clicky
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I have a Shadow which I really like, great for areobatics & chucking about the sky. Watched people go straight to big suits & be scared of trying lots of fun moves. My aerobatics suck but ain't scared of trying[:)
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20 Spitfires found in Burma could be made airworthy
splat123 replied to kallend's topic in The Bonfire
That's going to devalue a few (very) rich boys toys -
URGENT....Apache owners, discontinue use of new handles
splat123 replied to Tony-tonysuits's topic in Wing Suit Flying
I don't base, but would'nt it be a really bad idea to test jump a new suit in the base enviroment ? The base jumpers I've met do lots of practice jumps from planes with new suits. -
I find it makes it easier to zip arm wings up/down with foam
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I should have paid attentsion at school & got a proper fucking job !