riggerrob

Rumour has it that un-connected side-connectors contributed to John Parrot's broken neck. The way I heard it, John was trying to slide a tandem landing when he fell flat on his face. Meanwhile the student continued sliding on his butt. The resultant extreme angle (spines 180 degrees opposed at the shoulder hooks) broke John's neck. John was confined to a wheelchair after the botched landing. That was the version that I heard. The last time we discussed this, some one (Canadian) on dz.com claimed to have witnessed a different version but declined to share details. We challenge him to share his version of the story now.

On-line dating requires learning a whole new vocabulary. For example: " a few extra pounds" means "a few more pounds than the guy she hopes to date .... a few more than 200 pounds ... few women are healthy at over 200 pounds." "Professional" just means that you are employed.

Who stocks giveafuckometers? I cannot find them in the Para-Gear catalog? Lee Valley Tools does not giveafuckometers. The local Snap-On Tools dealer just laughed at me! You guys know what I am talking about when I describe the meter -with the two wires - that you use to evaluate an SST Racer with R3s containing a Phantom 22 sewn during the acid-mesh era and a pre F-111 main with a badly faded label .... ropes .... and .... rings and a spring-loaded .... It is the same giveafuckometers that you apply to the car towed into your shop that has quarter panels collier than your granny's Panamax. And it is similar to the giveafuckometers that you use to test the main spars on Beech 18s that are still waiting for the spar strap STC. Geez! I am sure sad that I misplaced my old giveafuckometer.

Starting up an FXC Astra: switch to "ON." The light flashes green 11 times, then goes solid green. What does this mean? My reading of the Astra manual (Revision 3, 1997) says that solid green means an error in the cutter circuit. Would a rigger more current than me please comment?

Forget the fancy "illegal" and "unapproved" language .... ... Because few jump planes are strong enough for aerobatics. Standard category and transport category airplanes trade structural strength for greater cargo (skydiver) capacity. Also remember that few jump-planes are certified for intention stalls and spins. Stalls and spins frequently occurr on the bottom end of poorly planned aerobatics. Poorly planned aerobatics often start with failing to secure loose objects on the cabin. Failing to secure loose skydivers pretty much guarantees that your weight and balance will fall out the back end of the envelope. Not even the worlds' best test pilot can recover (unstall or unspin) an unbalanced airplane.

***As the ink on my ticket dried then started to fade with age I've become acutely aware that only some riggers can sew and far fewer can sew well. I think you just need to find one of those. -Michael[/quote .................................... Which reminds me of the lectures about jumpsuit repair, vacuum cleaner repair, camera repair, repairs on close reserve containers, etc. during the CSPA Rigger A Course. I have taught that course at least a dozen times, but cannot find those lesson plans???? Where do the FAA Practical Testing Standards call for jumpsuit repairs? .... nor can I find those lesson plans from the last rigger course that I taught in Switzerland????? Which chapter in Poynter's Manual covers jumpsuit repairs??? Which chapter in the FAA manual covers jump-suit repairs? Or are jumpsuit repairs one of those skills that riggers are expected to learn without any formal training????? When teaching young riggers to sew, I try to start them with jumpsuit repairs. Bottom line: sewing is a perishable skill (like languages) that must be practiced - on a regular basis - if you want to retain it.

.............................................................................. Yes, As long as it has a larger engine (XP, Rheims Rocket or a variety of STCs) it will climb fast enough to work as a jump plane.

As a local seamstress or tailor to sew a few darts or pleats or tucks to down-size the suit without having to pick a million stitiches.

Backing erdnarob. I have never double-stowed rubber bands on a reserve. That includes a thousand-or-so round reserves along with a few diapered squares (Hobbit an Security X-210R) and some Racers that had free-bags closed with rubber bands. When packing newer Speed=Bags, I use smaller MIL SPEC rubber bands when the lines are thin. OTOH the I have double-stowed thousands of rubber bands on main d-bags. .. partly because the Strong manual says to double-stow bands on Dual Hawk tandems and partly because I was too lazy to search for small rubber bands when I broke one half-way through packing my own main.

Seat-belts might have prevented that Porter crash in Belgium. The final investigation was posted on the "incidents" forum. The problem started when the pilot decided to show off his aerobatic skills half-way to altitude. His barrel-roll was less than graceful. Because he failed to maintain positive Gs, skydivers flopped around inside the cabin and accident investigators allege that a flopping skydiver forced the pilot's head forward, jammed the electric trim button, more negative Gs tore off the left wing, etc. The other problem created by skydivers flopping around inside the cabin is that it ruins the balance of the airplane and ruins stability and controllability. While we can agree that aerobatics - in Porters - is a stupid practice, sometimes they mimic collision-avoidance maneuvers needed in the airport traffic pattern. The majority of mid-air collisions occur close to small airports as Sunday flyers fly where they are not looking. One thing we can learn is that seat-belts are a good practice until you climb above pattern altitude (usually 1,000 feet above ground level).

Confirm that the new d-bag is compatible with your Mirage container. Lay the empty d-bag inside the container to confirm that is about the same width, length and thickness. If you cannot find an exact match, install the next larger size of d-bag.

Warn your buddy that more early specifications were written by marketers than engineers. Quick riddle: what is the difference between a marketeer and a compulsive liar? Hah! Hah! On a more serious note, I have published my half-page rant about different canopy measuring methods a few times on dz.com. You might want to read my rant (in Canpara magazine circa 1983) about wing-loading.

"Oh yes I'm a sex offender ..." Sung by a soldier who got kicked out of the army for doing the wrong recreational drugs.

"My scrotum"

I have sewn a few ash bags. They lay on the left forearm, secured by 2.5 Velcro straps. The first strap wraps around the forearm near the elbow. The second strap wraps around the palm. The half strap wraps around the thumb to prevent the pouch from rotating. The last loop lays on top of the knuckles and gets pulled when you release ashes. When you pull the last loop, the entire top face of the pouch opens exposing ashes to the wind. Velcro closes 3 sides of the top flap.

How about sewing slender pockets on the outside of your jumpsuit? Use white canopy fabric. I'd your suit is loose enough, you can crack the chem-lights while riding in the airplane.

Best way to avoid collisions is for everyone to fly predictable patterns. I have jumped at busy European DZs where they had parachutes, gliders, privately owned airplanes and student pilots all gracefully sharing the same airspace. Parachutes "play nice" by avoiding over-flying the runway below 1,000 and consistently landing in the same field. They fly their parachutes paranoid, with eyes on stalks, always prepared to turn (right) out of the path of on-coming traffic.

PSA? I thought you said "Prostate Specific Anti-what hemacallit?" Let me tell you about my prostate biopsy today ..... Can any of you remember old-style desk telephones, with the black, plastic hand-pieces big enough to knock out bad guys? ..... Well the biopsy started with a tool longer than that .... then the doctor stuck a dozen needles in my butt .... not my buttocks .... in my butt ... then the pain started ... now I have blood leaking out both ends ...

John Leblanc (PD) recently published a video where he explains how some canopies are trimmed steeply nose while others are trimmed competitively flat. PD Silhouettes are trimmed flat for long glide.

Definitely buy a hoodie because an once of insulation on your head is worth a pound anywhere else. Try to think of your body as a chimney with all the heat escaping from your head and neck. Also look for a snug-fitting collar to keep warm blood flowing towards your head. Oh! And and about all those quest short jackets that leave your butt hanging out in the breeze ... great for fashion and you butt will remain small with all the shivering you do. For cold weather, I only buy thigh-length jackets. Even a single-layer down jacket (long enough to cover your butt) will reduce shivering in the morning. IOW Waist-length winter jackets only keep you warm when paired with bib overalls (high top pants).

Reminds me of a woman I meet on Plenty of Fish. As we sipped our first coffees, she asked about past relationships. As soon as the words "I left her .." passed my lips, her shoulder muscles cramped and the date was effectively over.

.................................................... Hey! I used to work with Mr. Thinks too highly of himself. He hit on every female student that came through the DZ. At last count, he was working on wife number 5!

Magnets? Magnets? I remember magnets from the good old days. Magnets are so "last week!" I predict that someone will invent an iPhone app for large formation planning next week. Imagine a few dozen people milling around the packing area, all staring at their fancy phones. No need for eye-contact. Just tap the little coloured figure on your phone to see who they are, how many jumps they have (during the past week), what colour their panties are, etc. The week after that, someone will invent a mobile version of the app, so that you can plan the dive while still driving towards the DZ. Then the GPS in your phone will track you through manifest, gearing up, boarding the airplane, diving out the door, docking in your slot, etc. The following week, someone will up-date that iPhone app with a heads up display inside your climate-controlled helmet. The app will tell you both the colour of the leg you are supposed to grip on the third point AND the colour of the gripper. The week after that .....

The noisy aircraft, flown low, was probably spooking whatever the hunter was hunting. ........................................................................ So he adds to the problem with a "killing" noise that definitely scares off wild game. Sometimes their logic escapes me??????????

....................................................................................... Over the years, a wide variety of "one-man shops" have manufactured parachutes in Canada: Canadian AeroSports, Ron Dionne, Flying High, Robert " Luke" Lucas, MS Enterprises, Niagara Parachutes, Roger Sport, Sequential Flyer, West Way, etc. Canadian Aerosports is located in Mission, B.C. He made a wide variety of square, tapered, even cross- braced canopies during the 1990s. He still does a bit of rigging. OVN (Object Vol Nonidentifier = Unidentified Flying Object) reserves were made in Valcourt, Quebec back during the 1990s.