A young man with a strong urge to empty his bladder walks around looking for relief. He spys it up ahead in the form of an upraised fist. Extended from an arm with biceps bulging it was posted to an entry of a male urinal. He kicks the door open with his feet, avoiding having to chance infection from the handle. Before entering he looks briefly over at the entry to the Ladies toilets. He is faintly amused as the Marquis de Sade's words echo in his head "And a womans power resides between her legs". The sign on the door was a leg dressed up in sexy lingerie.
With this thought in mind and the resultant smile upon his face he walks in and surveys the situation. Around him are men waiting to rid themselves of their burden. A brief glance showed all cubicles to be engaged and the urinal to be full of men carefully avoiding being seen to make contact with the eye to genitalia. He pondered this amusing fact, wondering about homophobia and mens attachment to penis size. He looked around at the other men waiting. One guy was still in his jumpsuit, still fresh from the days competition. He tapped his foot impatiently as his fingers spidered up against his leg, the few beers he'd used as a filter were trying to worm their way out.
Suddenly there was an opening at the urinal. The man in the jumpsuit was closest but looking in the direction of the cubicles his face was a betrayal of nervous longing. The other men deferred to his proximity as he stood there indecisive wishing he was somewhere else. The amused young man siezed the moment and sauntered cockily up to the space. He sighed audible relief as he unzippered his pants. As he stood there waiting for his lizard to bleed his thoughts returned to mens importance of size. In the urinal, he observed, the social hierarchy of men reverted to caveman days. The "pecker" order became the pecking order.
At this though he laughed out aloud to himself, the lizard was almost dry, he felt alot better. The men next to him thinking that his laughing was an insult to their manhood stiffened at the sound. He turned around and was about to ask how the man next to hims day in competition was, when he realized the man was making an appraisal of his package. He was checking "Who was HE to laugh?" The man stared in shock and awe, quite obviously intimidated. This only served to increase his mirth and he burst into fits of laughter. This caused all the men to look in his direction and notice the look on the stunned embarassed man.Following the line of his focus a collective murmer of astonishment was released.
The man just laughed as the man to his right gave him an angry stare.
"How man jumps do you have ?"
"300 or so" he replied casually. "You?"
"1200..." The shocked man stammered slowly still staring into his eyes. In his head he was computing the simple equation ( Penis(Inches) divide by Jump numbers) that he used to assign a man a value in his world. The laughing man was 8 times the man he was!!! He lowered his eyes.
The man sighed and as he left the urinal a few lines of one of his favorie pets came unbidden to his lips.
" Oh thee of a vile cancerous wit... "
" Dont thee know the swarm will fit? "
" Oh yes! said he, rubbing his hands in glee "
" But dont you SEE!!?? "
"Or is it just me "
