Cleatus
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Everything posted by Cleatus
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Q. What's the difference between a epileptic oyster shucker and a hooker with dysentary? A. The oyster shucker has Fits when he Shucks.
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Why are you spending your Friday night on dz.com?
Cleatus replied to iluvtofly's topic in The Bonfire
I'm towing a barge up the west coast of Puerto Rico. I should be in Arecibo in time to watch the sunset load land tomorrow evening. -
Kerry King to melt your face off. B.B. King to melt her pants off.
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It's called the 'Octagon' I have names for my testicles as well. The right one is James Westfall, and the left one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. If you ladies play your cards right, you just might meet the whole gang.
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I like it! But wouldn't it kinda render the whole "When slam pigs fly!" thing moot? We'd have slam pigs flying every weekend! Blues, Dave Since we lost our resident Slam Pig this season, it would be nice to have a new herd, or flock, or gaggle of slam piglets to have at the DZ next season. This sport is about tradition damn it! We are all counting on you.
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Live n dive enterprises? A little to Lance Bass. How about "SLAM PIG SKYDIVING SCHOOL"? Let them know what they're getting into
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Great pics! Now you are offically a rock star!
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Try kayak.com. It is good when looking for multi-city trips.
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Wow, that seems like a really cool PIMP!
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Quotethe g-forces may, for some, produce a "brown out," not a full black out, which could still comprimise the jump. I had a "brown out" on my first B. It didn't comprimse the jump, just my pride.
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Congratulations!!!!
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How do you get a faggot to fuck your girlfriend? You shit in her pussy.
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A Girl goes to the confessional at church. She says, "Forgive me Father for I have sinned, I had sex with my boyfriend 7 times last night" The father looks at her for a minute, then replies, "All right, I want you to get 7 lemon and sqeeze the juice of those lemons into a glass. Then I want you to drink the juice." "Will this clense me of my sins?" "No, but it will knock that damn smile off your face!
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If I even start to think my crew smells like a bunch of strippers, I will abandon ship. Nothing good can come from that.
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It's not too bad. We are just south of Puerto Rico and I have a Cingular EDGE card for the internet. It could be better though, my crew could be a bunch of strippers with santa hats, our mast could be a 1000' tall A. But I guess a pipe dream is a pipe dream no matter where you are. Merry Christmas
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It's a small tug but we do have a nice GALLEY. "Kitchen" and you call yourself a Viking? Thanks for the photoshop!
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Sounds like the title of a country song, doesn't it?
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I'm down in Puerto Rico right now, and the A's here are a little different,(see attachment) but doable. 450' from catwalk to dish. Of course then you have to battle Dr. Evil, save the world, then bang some hottie. would this be an "A" or an "O"?
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***I think you and I equally care about the kitten, and equally love the meat on our plate. *** Come on man do you really care? for christ sakes, Please, think about the kittens.
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Please, think of the kittens.
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Who'll be at the Perrine over the Labor Day long weekend
Cleatus replied to CanuckInUSA's topic in Archive
QuoteThe Seattle BASE crew will be there in force, The Spokane BASE crew will be there in force, representin' the eastside. -
About a week and a half ago, I was flying with my rig. I was pulled aside to get grouped by the back of a liver spotted hand. Meanwhile, my stash bag also went for additional screening. All of a sudden I hear the unmistakable sound of a shrivel flap.(This sound gives me a erection, which lead to something else that I'll post on the Bonfire.) Anyway, I said, DUDE!? at which point several TSA people came to me and said I need to be quite. Fortunately, dude only pulled it about halfway open before he relized what it was. The point, they said if your bag gets picked for additional screening, that you can ask them to wait for you to be right there when they rifle through your shit.
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'sloppy joes' NOT 'dirty sanchez' BIG difference! That was our breakfast, lunch, and dinner
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I had a little run in there, 1/1/00. I was able to meet the nice folk with the RR police, Border Patrol, Highway Patrol, Texas Rangers, Park Rangers, and of course the Sheriff. Apparently Y2K up'ed the security level. However the "sloppy joes" at the Del Rio jail are the best I ever had
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Hey, what's the worst that can happen?