So you are offended that you turned this thread into an angry diatribe. And all those atheists are going to cheap hotels to participate in meaningless ceremonies, causing them to later "flip out." What losers! And they will get their comeuppance, because the progressive conservatives living in electrically powered modern cities are better off than all those rural backwards atheists who hate progress and who have no power. A trillion dollars better! People like you, who live next to a fifty million acre wilderness paradise and who regularly commune with Nature, all those super gibbous moons and whatnot. And who are NOT AT ALL materialist. And your examples are valid, but examples other people use about Christianity are exceptions.
And when people point out the conflict in all the above, you claim "Am I not in jest?" And that the rest of the people here just can't handle your rapier wit. But you were really being serious. In a funny way.
That about cover it?