I always heard take off one shoe and shove it down the front of your jumpsuit. It won't change the outcome, but the investigators will go nuts trying to figure out how it got there.
As noted above, I will likely be too busy trying to fight the situation to pick a target (or take off my shoe, for that matter).
If I can choose, I'm going for the swoop pond. It won't change the outcome (both because it's too shallow and because hitting water at terminal would be fatal). I'd just be going for the biggest cannonball ever.