Inspection reccomended___to fight Freefall Gremlins____________

[patworks 5]

Yes, as an acid casualty of the 60s I are well
aquatinted with the scourge of skydivin:
freefall gremlins.
Icky little demons, eh?

These critters are guys so SKINNY from massive over
doses of speed that ya cant even seem em in day light!

Standing sideways, 53 freefall gremlins can (and do) go front-front-front float-float!
This reveals why your exits usually funnel!

_The Guinnius Book of Records_ shows 121 on the step of a Cessna 172, beside a circus fat lady, who attempted doing a solo tandem. [C.O.D. : Impact]

They don’t weigh much; they are light.
So light that they just feel like a bobble when they force you to funnel the formation.

Meaner than Farmer Nasty, too.
Mean? So mean that they blind people to how wonderfully marvy you fly, usually, except today.

Widespread ? So globally common, that each DZ haz several many.

Inspection reccomended___to fight Freefall Gremlins____________

How do you know that your DZ has a freefall Gremlin infestation?

____Sure indicators of gremlin-itis:____
--You actually get caught making an apparent mistake.
--You see dust-devils (actually dust devils are jus nasty gremlins going for
coffee or returning from a raid)
--The first load on Sunday does not suit up till 9:30 (gremlins drugged the beer)
--Your jump masters offer a tour of impact craters which:
takes over an hour & is popular with Whuffos.


Freefall Gremlin Information___[true facts]------------------------------------

Freefall Gremlins’ favorite spectator sport?
-- your pilot-chute-in-tow.
Freefall Gremlins’ Hobbies?
--- making plaster casts of impact craters for bird baths.

Freefall Gremlins’ favorite food
-- a de-brief that draws blood.

Freefall Gremlins’ exist, are protected by the Sierra Club and, They have names:

Common Freefall Gremlins’ Last-Names: ------------------------------------
-- Thebasefloated,
-- youstolemyair,
-- sitforbrains,
-- brainfart
-- asshole,
-- brainlock
-- theexitsucked...,
-- iwasblindedbythebeautyofyourentry,

... I forget the rest. but No Fear. You’ll meet em all in time |->

crazy Pat Works SCS-1 FB-61

Pat Works nee Madden Travis Works, Jr .B1575, C1798, D1813, Star Crest Solo#1, USPA#189,

[ltdiver 3]

Thanks for the smiles, Pat. I'm actually laughing out loud and nodding my head in agreement at the same time.

Miss you at Perris. When are you gracing us with your presence again? Sometime soon, I hope!

ltdiver

Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon

[patworks 5]

Itdiver (L.)
Yo. I got a new big parachute and planned to come out before Christmas... No-fit in rig. Working on it. See yall soon.

Pat Works nee Madden Travis Works, Jr .B1575, C1798, D1813, Star Crest Solo#1, USPA#189,