Monogamy

[nigel99 612]

Here is a thought that puzzles me. Why do so many people feel that anything other than monogamy is a problem?

Even in the bible polygamy was fairly common and it appears to be a modern moralistic view that monogamy is the "correct" way of life (or as my dad puts it serial monogamy).

I don't have a problem with open marriages (or relationships), and frankly if either party has a higher sex drive and there is no cheating involved why not? Or simply if the individual involved likes variety.

Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

[Meso 38]

Because people always feel the need to interfere when it comes to others not living along the normal rules of society.

Apparently kids are supposed to grow up with 1 father and 1 mother, anything else is not right!

The term 'serial monogamy' is a good one, as people will talk about the devastating consequences of a child growing up with 2 mothers. But it's perfectly okay if they grow up with 5 mothers, as long as they all occur at different times.

There is no logical reason as to 'why not'. It's a personal decision that which should all adults enter into with the knowledge of what's going on- is a victimless crime.

But again, it goes against everything we were taught as children, and therefore it is wrong! Because only the most arrogant and evil minds dare stray away from our social teachings and question 'why?'.

[turtlespeed 226]

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Because people always feel the need to interfere when it comes to others not living along the normal rules of society.

Apparently kids are supposed to grow up with 1 father and 1 mother, anything else is not right!

The term 'serial monogamy' is a good one, as people will talk about the devastating consequences of a child growing up with 2 mothers. But it's perfectly okay if they grow up with 5 mothers, as long as they all occur at different times.

There is no logical reason as to 'why not'. It's a personal decision that which should all adults enter into with the knowledge of what's going on- is a victimless crime.

But again, it goes against everything we were taught as children, and therefore it is wrong! Because only the most arrogant and evil minds dare stray away from our social teachings and question 'why?'.

Have you ever seen the stats of the populace of jails vs the number of parents?

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[Meso 38]

Are you referring solely to polygamous relationships or number of parents in terms marriages in general relating to a single parent.

Since the former would provide very little research numbers, I'll assume you are referring to the latter about parents in general.

And in that case, my point stands unaffected. It is legal for someone to marry someone, remain married for a week, divorce and remarry a week later. And yet it is illegal for a polygamous relationship, which in many cases affect the children far less than multiple marriages after each other. Assuming that the polygamous relationship is a good one, and even assuming it isn't- it would put it on par with regular marriage/divorce.

[nigel99 612]

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Have you ever seen the stats of the populace of jails vs the number of parents?

They were talking about something similar on the radio this morning. They discussed the behaviour of kids from families with step-parents or single parents versus traditional family units. I think that it is a flawed assumption, chances are a child with a step-parent has had at least 1 dishonest or badly adjusted parent (divorce through cheating, abuse etc). If you take into a account families where the couples are still together there is a good chance that they communicate with each other, work through problems and are generally healthier mentally and socially.

I guess that as crime rates in Saudi are lower than the US maybe it is because they allow polygamy

Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

[turtlespeed 226]

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Are you referring solely to polygamous relationships or number of parents in terms marriages in general relating to a single parent.

Since the former would provide very little research numbers, I'll assume you are referring to the latter about parents in general.

And in that case, my point stands unaffected. It is legal for someone to marry someone, remain married for a week, divorce and remarry a week later. And yet it is illegal for a polygamous relationship, which in many cases affect the children far less than multiple marriages after each other. Assuming that the polygamous relationship is a good one, and even assuming it isn't- it would put it on par with regular marriage/divorce.

I think that more people were better behaved when marriage was an institution that was worked on with more determination and given more respect.

When the family breaks down, the children do too.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[turtlespeed 226]

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I guess that as crime rates in Saudi are lower than the US maybe it is because they allow polygamy

Couldn't have anything to do with cutting off hands for theft, or heads for drugs and murder, eh?

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[Kennedy 0]

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I guess that as crime rates in Saudi are lower than the US maybe it is because they allow polygamy

Couldn't have anything to do with cutting off hands for theft, or heads for drugs and murder, eh?

Or the fact that many crimes are not treated as crimes in Saudi Arabia. It's one of the top destinations for human trafficking. Servants' rights can be nonexistant, as can women's rights. As for crime defined as crime, under reporting is common place and protection of powerful people's image (saving face) trumps truth every time.

Criminology only exists over there as a way to support the government.

witty subliminal message
Guard your honor, let your reputation fall where it will, and outlast the bastards.
1*

[wmw999 2,583]

Come on Kennedy -- you can't inject reason and facts into a perfectly good quip-fest.

Next thing you know people might want to actually discuss topics.

Wendy P.

There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown)

[beowulf 1]

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Have you ever seen the stats of the populace of jails vs the number of parents?

They were talking about something similar on the radio this morning. They discussed the behaviour of kids from families with step-parents or single parents versus traditional family units. I think that it is a flawed assumption, chances are a child with a step-parent has had at least 1 dishonest or badly adjusted parent (divorce through cheating, abuse etc). If you take into a account families where the couples are still together there is a good chance that they communicate with each other, work through problems and are generally healthier mentally and socially.

I guess that as crime rates in Saudi are lower than the US maybe it is because they allow polygamy

I can't think of any reason that polygamy would have any affect on crime rates.

I personally don't care it polygamy is legal or not. I don't even understand the whole issue at all. Why bother to get married! If you want to have 5 wives why go through the trouble of marrying each one! There is no law against sharing your life with multiple women.

[TriGirl 343]

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I can't think of any reason that polygamy would have any affect on crime rates.

I personally don't care it polygamy is legal or not. I don't even understand the whole issue at all. Why bother to get married! If you want to have 5 wives why go through the trouble of marrying each one! There is no law against sharing your life with multiple women.

Until health benefits, survivor benefits, etc, will go to whomever the person designates, there will be a requirement for marriage. No shared health benefits when you have 4 or 5 girlfriends, but only a legal spouse is usually permitted to share work-provided benefits such as health care and life insurance (yes, I've heard of some companies that now allow for the inclusion of a "significant other, but they're rare).

See the upside, and always wear your parachute! -- Christopher Titus

Shut Up & Jump!

[nigel99 612]

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Have you ever seen the stats of the populace of jails vs the number of parents?

I guess that as crime rates in Saudi are lower than the US maybe it is because they allow polygamy

I can't think of any reason that polygamy would have any affect on crime rates.

I personally don't care it polygamy is legal or not. I don't even understand the whole issue at all. Why bother to get married! If you want to have 5 wives why go through the trouble of marrying each one! There is no law against sharing your life with multiple women.

I was being sarcastic regarding crime rates based on the prison fact.

I agree with your view, although I think it goes both ways. If men are allowed multiple partners so are women.

I like marriage, and think of it as a commitment to my partner. To me it shows I really do want to spend the rest of my life with her. But I don't believe that 1 person can necessarily meet all the needs of another, and therefore multiple partners can be healthy. I think we tend to view intimate relationships between adults through a sexual context and that is part of the problem (not that I am precluding sex with multiple partners).

Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

[kelpdiver 2]

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I think that more people were better behaved when marriage was an institution that was worked on with more determination and given more respect.

When the family breaks down, the children do too.

But you're alluding to the assertion that crime goes up with the rate of single parenthood. Polygamy would involve the parental count going up from 2, not down.

If 2 parents means less crime, doesn't 3 do even better?

[turtlespeed 226]

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I think that more people were better behaved when marriage was an institution that was worked on with more determination and given more respect.

When the family breaks down, the children do too.

But you're alluding to the assertion that crime goes up with the rate of single parenthood. Polygamy would involve the parental count going up from 2, not down.

If 2 parents means less crime, doesn't 3 do even better?

No - I am alluding to the assertion that crime goes up with broken and/or non traditional homes.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[billvon 3,107]

>No - I am alluding to the assertion that crime goes up with broken and/or
> non traditional homes.


Do you have any data that shows crime goes up with nontraditional homes?

Broken homes - agreed. Following that logic, I expect you'd be opposed to any laws that would break up polygamous families.

[Amazon 7]

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Come on Kennedy -- you can't inject reason and facts into a perfectly good quip-fest.

Next thing you know people might want to actually discuss topics.

Wendy P.

I am having a hard time breathing.... considering WHO is defending the sanctity of marriage here


MUST breathe.....

[Skwrl 56]

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When the family breaks down, the children do too.

Let's assume, solely for the sake of argument, that you're correct.

So how does that apply to families (of whatever shape, size, composition, etc.) without children? Using your rationale, non-reproducing groups of people should be able to form whatever marital arrangements they consent to, but in the case of folks who do reproduce, separation and divorce should be much, much harder... Am I reading you right on that?

Skwrl Productions - Wingsuit Photography

Northeast Bird School - Chief Logistics Guy and Video Dork

[turtlespeed 226]

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When the family breaks down, the children do too.

Let's assume, solely for the sake of argument, that you're correct.

So how does that apply to families (of whatever shape, size, composition, etc.) without children? Using your rationale, non-reproducing groups of people should be able to form whatever marital arrangements they consent to, but in the case of folks who do reproduce, separation and divorce should be much, much harder... Am I reading you right on that?

I don't have an opinion on that.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[skyrider 0]

I prefer Polygamy. http://www.ibabuzz.com/bottomsup/backgrounder-the-story-behind-polygamy-porter/

[marks2065 0]

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I can't think of any reason that polygamy would have any affect on crime rates.

I personally don't care it polygamy is legal or not. I don't even understand the whole issue at all. Why bother to get married! If you want to have 5 wives why go through the trouble of marrying each one! There is no law against sharing your life with multiple women.

Until health benefits, survivor benefits, etc, will go to whomever the person designates, there will be a requirement for marriage. No shared health benefits when you have 4 or 5 girlfriends, but only a legal spouse is usually permitted to share work-provided benefits such as health care and life insurance (yes, I've heard of some companies that now allow for the inclusion of a "significant other, but they're rare).

People just can't think anymore! the multiple girlfriend thing in reguards to insurance is easy, incorperate, put them all on the payroll (as house cleaners for you house cleaning business) and get a group policy. plus by staying single and having kids you get the head of household deduction on your tax return and earned income credit as long as you keep each wife's pay under 40k.

[turtlespeed 226]

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I can't think of any reason that polygamy would have any affect on crime rates.

I personally don't care it polygamy is legal or not. I don't even understand the whole issue at all. Why bother to get married! If you want to have 5 wives why go through the trouble of marrying each one! There is no law against sharing your life with multiple women.

Until health benefits, survivor benefits, etc, will go to whomever the person designates, there will be a requirement for marriage. No shared health benefits when you have 4 or 5 girlfriends, but only a legal spouse is usually permitted to share work-provided benefits such as health care and life insurance (yes, I've heard of some companies that now allow for the inclusion of a "significant other, but they're rare).

People just can't think anymore! the multiple girlfriend thing in reguards to insurance is easy, incorperate, put them all on the payroll (as house cleaners for you house cleaning business) and get a group policy. plus by staying single and having kids you get the head of household deduction on your tax return and earned income credit as long as you keep each wife's pay under 40k.

Workers comp for that kind of thing is cheaper if you diversify. One sammich maker, One ber bringer, etc.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[nigel99 612]

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I think that more people were better behaved when marriage was an institution that was worked on with more determination and given more respect.

When the family breaks down, the children do too.

But you're alluding to the assertion that crime goes up with the rate of single parenthood. Polygamy would involve the parental count going up from 2, not down.

If 2 parents means less crime, doesn't 3 do even better?

No - I am alluding to the assertion that crime goes up with broken and/or non traditional homes.

I disagree with the non-traditional homes aspect. In the UK the shortage of housing is not driven by population growth or immigration but largely by the breakdown of families (so 1 family ends up occupying 2 homes). The stress on finances in these situations can be immense. Add to this the fact that many people don't have extended family to lean on for support and you have a very high stress situation that people are living in.

To add some perspective my parents shared our home with a single mom and her 2 kids when I was growing up. Effectively they pooled resources. We kids grew pretty close and are still much like brothers and sisters 20 years later. I believe the sharing was driven by religious motives (help the needy) rather than sexual and my parents certainly portray the view that they would be shocked if people thought there was anything else to their relationship (not that I would be bothered).

Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

[popsjumper 2]

Monogamy sucks...well, at least up to the point of the marriage license being signed.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[nigel99 612]

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Monogamy sucks...well, at least up to the point of the marriage license being signed.

What has a neck but does not swallow?









A: A wife
B: A bottle

Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

[RonD1120 62]

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Here is a thought that puzzles me. Why do so many people feel that anything other than monogamy is a problem?

Even in the bible polygamy was fairly common and it appears to be a modern moralistic view that monogamy is the "correct" way of life (or as my dad puts it serial monogamy).

I don't have a problem with open marriages (or relationships), and frankly if either party has a higher sex drive and there is no cheating involved why not? Or simply if the individual involved likes variety.

Monogamy teaches respect and responsibility for another person. That concept is losing popularity in the U.S. It is being replaced with political correctness and bigger government. It is just signs of the end of times, or eschatology.

Look for the shiny things of God revealed by the Holy Spirit. They only last for an instant but it is a Holy Instant. Let your soul absorb them.