Weird and drunk people, please stop flying!

[riddler 0]

Last week, Joseph Hedlund Johnson passed a note to a stewardess after takeoff from a Portland flight to Hawaii. The note didn't make much sense, but it was enough to scare the stewardess into turning it over to the captain, who ordered the plane turned around, and an F-15 fighter escort back to Portland. The note, which cites Gilligan's Island, reads thus:

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“I thought I was going to die, we were so high up,” the card said. “I thought to myself: I hope we don’t crash and burn or worse yet landing in the ocean, living through it, only to be eaten by sharks, or worse yet, end up on some place like Gilligan’s Island, stranded, or worse yet, be eaten by a tribe of headhunters, speaking of headhunters, why do they just eat outsiders, and not the family members? Strange … and what if the plane ripped apart in mid-flight and we plumited (sic) to earth, landed on Gilligan’s Island and then lived through it, and the only woman there was Mrs. Thurston Howell III? No Mary Anne (my favorite) no Ginger, just Lovey! If it were just her, I think I’d opt for the sharks, maybe the headhunters.”

And if you are going to write weird things and pose a threat, whether it be a bank robbery note, or threatening a plane crash, please use correct spelling and grammar. It's bad enough you have to scare people, but if they can't decipher your scribbles, they are going to be even more scared.

Also last week, Muhammad Abu Tahir had five drinks, then locked himself in the bathroom, leaving his shoes outside, stripped his shirt off, and started shaving. Then he yelled at the flight attendant, and grabbed her. The pilot made an emergency landing here in Colorado, also with military jets scrambled.

Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD

[kallend 2,148]

Anyone who wants to fly commercially these days has to be a bit wierd.

...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

[freethefly 6]

No Mary Anne? I'd opt for the sharks, too.

"...And once you're gone, you can't come back
When you're out of the blue and into the black."
Neil Young

[Bolas 5]

Flirting with a flight attendent (badly) with his girlfriend right there takes some balls.

Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting
If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh.

[ryoder 1,590]

Do you really think I could put up with today's asinine security theater if I was sober???

"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

[Andy9o8 2]

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Do you really think I could put up with today's asinine security theater if I was sober???

Reminds me of a joke I heard once.
Cop stops a guy for DUI. Asks him, "You been drinking, sir?" Guy answers: " 'Course I have, Ossifer. You think I could stand all these other assholes on the road if I was sober?"

[skyrider 0]

If wierd a drunk people stop flying, there will be no DZ's!

[rushmc 23]

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If wierd a drunk people stop flying, there will be no DZ's!

"America will never be destroyed from the outside,
if we falter and lose our freedoms,
it will be because we destroyed ourselves."
Abraham Lincoln

[guppykf 0]

+ 1

THRIVING IN MY DASH!!

[riddler 0]

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If wierd a weird and drunk people stop flying

So it was you that wrote the note!

Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD