kbordson 8 #1 September 9, 2009 How serious is the "job" of being a Parent? I was going to make this as a poll, but I didn't really want the light and casual answers that one can check with a lil click. edit to add: and for the record, this is NOT about President Obamas speech. Just about parenting in general Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grimmie 186 #2 September 9, 2009 This is a joke...right??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kbordson 8 #3 September 9, 2009 Quote This is a joke...right??? Nope. Just wondering the general opinion of this population. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,584 #4 September 9, 2009 It's pretty serious, but if you only do it seriously you miss half of the fun and enrichment. A large part of parenting is seeing the world fresh again, only the world has changed from when you were young and looking at it. To me, the most serious parts were giving my son the tools to deal with the world as he found it -- not the world I wanted him to have, but the one that's really out there. It meant giving him a wide range of experiences and information, preferably before he needed it -- rather than in the form of advice after he needed it. It didn't mean trying to limit his world artificially; kids are inquisitive, and I'd rather he had the tools to deal with what he found if he went exploring on his own. Another important thing was making sure that he was able to love and look up to both parents -- even through a divorce. Since he's 25 now, self-sufficient, has started saving towards his retirement, and is generally intelligent, open-minded, inquisitive, and good-looking to boot )not that I'm prejudiced or anything Wendy P. There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflybella 0 #5 September 9, 2009 Curious why job is in quotes? Action expresses priority. - Mahatma Ghandi Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #6 September 9, 2009 Before being a parent I'd heard how tiring, stressful, dangerous, depressing and difficult being a parent it. I had no idea how much worse it was. I also had no idea how much fun it would be. It's difficult and serious. A two-year-old is the living example of human nature. Selfish and violent and prone to outbursts. I admit that I've lost battles of will wil both of my kids. They will simply mentally and physically wear you out. But the fact that I can take the 5 year old to a restaurant now is welcome evidence of the hard work. I want my kids to be good. And I work at their behavior and work on myself. I think I've learned, however, that I just want to teach them more than they've taught me. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #7 September 9, 2009 "To have a child is to give a hostage to fate." - source unknown to me. - The environment, that the parent grew up with, is completely different than the once facing the child. - The world conspires against everyone. - Parents give children the benefit of their knowledge and very few are competent adults. it could happen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warpedskydiver 0 #8 September 9, 2009 Not a job, but a duty. There is no choice, you must do it. If it all works out then fine, if not oh well, it is still your kid. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quade 4 #9 September 9, 2009 Contrary to Warpedskydiver's opinion, yes, it is a option whether or not a person will breed and be a parent. Virtually anyone in America, male or female, can pretty much make the choice not to have kids and be nearly 100% guaranteed that their choice is final. It's the folks that won't commit or want to leave options on the table that are not as reliable that can be the problem.quade - The World's Most Boring Skydiver Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baksteen 84 #10 September 9, 2009 I think he meant that it's not an option to take care of your children, instead of it's not an option to have children And all other things being equal, I agree. You had a child, so it's your responsibility. There is no excuse for neglecting or mistreating a child. "That formation-stuff in freefall is just fun and games but with an open parachute it's starting to sound like, you know, an extreme sport." ~mom Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quade 4 #11 September 9, 2009 And what I'm saying is, I think people should be a bit more responsible and not have children UNLESS they know for a fact they are prepared for it and willing to take care of it until it can take care of itself. We, the human race, are WAY beyond our need to breed. We have kids for a ton of reasons, but the simple continuation of the species isn't one of them and is, for the most, part completely unnecessary at this point. It kind of goes back to the old saw about needing a license for a dog, but to be a parent . . . nothing. To directly answer the original post, I think it's one of the most important things a person can possibly do. It's a pity so many people are complete failures at it. I'm not saying everyone, but I am saying WAY more than there ought to be.quade - The World's Most Boring Skydiver Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bullin82 0 #12 September 9, 2009 Its this simple... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kbordson 8 #13 September 9, 2009 QuoteCurious why job is in quotes? A lovely friend of mine used to hear comments about not having a "job" while she spent time at home raising her children. I always told her that it was a "job" - just not one that is typically put on a resume. Also... some don't like it referred to as a "job" because it's not really the "typical" 9-5, 40hrs week and 2w vacation type "job." Like owning a farm is not a "job." It's a lifestyle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,584 #14 September 9, 2009 I like that -- parenting is exactly that, a lifestyle. One that allows for lots of variation, though. Done right, it reflects both the parents and the child in the world around. Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warpedskydiver 0 #15 September 9, 2009 Hey it is an option, but once that choice is made it is not a job, but a duty. Try to avoid translating common sense into Kalifornian. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warpedskydiver 0 #16 September 9, 2009 How come I get a hardon when I hear hotties say "Job" really slow and sexy like.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rehmwa 2 #17 September 9, 2009 QuoteHow serious is the "job" of being a Parent? SPeaker's COrner I think the NEA takes that doody very seriously - the breeders have to have someone from the government do it for them. ... Driving is a one dimensional activity - a monkey can do it - being proud of your driving abilities is like being proud of being able to put on pants Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
squirrelgirl 0 #18 September 10, 2009 The job is an incredibly serious one, which is part of the reason why I maintain that I do not wish to have children. (I could change my mind, but we'll see.) I am firm believer in the quote "It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men." I help repair broken adults for a living and it leaves me worn out, emotionally drained, and in desperate need of a mental health day. Sometimes I laugh and sometimes I get to see something really good, but mostly it is one of the hardest jobs there is. Being a parent is a tough job because, primarily, they should be building children that will be able to have a productive, healthy future. Not as easy as it looks! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
steve1 5 #19 September 11, 2009 Quote I help repair broken adults for a living and it leaves me worn out, emotionally drained, and in desperate need of a mental health day. Sometimes I laugh and sometimes I get to see something really good, but mostly it is one of the hardest jobs there is. Being a parent is a tough job because, primarily, they should be building children that will be able to have a productive, healthy future. Not as easy as it looks! I work as a counselor, therapist, in a really tough school. I've probably been there way too long...(25 years). I've been feeling really burned out lately. One of the ways I used to recharge was just spending time with my kids. It truly gives meaning to your life....I knew I was helping them, when I did that, and it helped me too..... Now, I'm looking forward to grand kids. I knew a guy once who had grandkids. He said he used to pick the "little darlings" up on Friday, and then take the little "Sons a Bitches" home on Monday. It's not easy raising kids.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,584 #20 September 11, 2009 Quote I knew a guy once who had grandkids. He said he used to pick the "little darlings" up on Friday, and then take the little "Sons a Bitches" home on Monday My mother watched my son while I worked until he was 2 1/2. She said that the high point of her morning was seeing his shiny smiling face come in the door, and the high point of the afternoon was seeing it go back out again Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Niki1 2 #21 September 11, 2009 Quote Quote Curious why job is in quotes? A lovely friend of mine used to hear comments about not having a "job" while she spent time at home raising her children. I always told her that it was a "job" - just not one that is typically put on a resume. Also... some don't like it referred to as a "job" because it's not really the "typical" 9-5, 40hrs week and 2w vacation type "job." Like owning a farm is not a "job." It's a lifestyle. It's the most important job in the world. No training required. The responsibilty of raiseing a little human being to have a good idia of right and wrong is more than I ever wanted. That's why I never had children. I can understand how rewarding it may be but it just is not my bag. I admit that I'm too selfish to expect myself to do a good job of it. Hell I've been barely able to take care of myself most of my life. I'm really glad there are people who want to do it and that a LOT of them are actually pretty good at it. I like other people kids. To see them learn somethong is one of the most awsome things in the world. I'm glad that it's the women who bear the children and give birth. NO WAY I'd go through that. I think if the men had to give birth, the species would die out in one generation. I heard about a woman getting back into the job market after having raised her chiildren. After getting turned down several times for no recent work history, she rewrote her resume. She listed the management slills, the practical skills, the health care skills and so on. It was really impressive when you looked at it that way.Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossilbe before they were done. Louis D Brandeis Where are we going and why are we in this basket? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoShitThereIWas 0 #22 September 15, 2009 Quote How come I get a hardon when I hear hotties say "Job" really slow and sexy like.... Probably because that is the only kind of "job" you get? Roy Bacon: "Elvises, light your fires." Sting: "Be yourself no matter what they say." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
robskydiv 0 #23 September 15, 2009 Well, I don't get paid for it. But it is a labor of love. It's a committment and an innate responsibility. To know that my two children are totally dependent upon me to meet their basic needs, to know they love me and that I love them so much. It's a wonderful responsibility. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warpedskydiver 0 #24 September 15, 2009 Quote Quote How come I get a hardon when I hear hotties say "Job" really slow and sexy like.... Probably because that is the only kind of "job" you get? You know so little.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jimmytavino 16 #25 September 15, 2009 It's pretty Serious, in the same way that skydiving is 'serious'...... which also means that You can have a LOT of FUN, with it !!!And As with skydiving,,,,It's better to be Prepared... for parenthood than to have it "thrust upon you " ..Certain things in one's life should be in place, starting with a loving stable couple, who are endearing to create another person...or two, or three... Employment, acceptable housing, either owned or rented, a track record of sensible decision making, money IN THE BANK... and a Realistic attitude about the upcoming changes in spending of 'discretionary income" all need to be in place... Otherwise, as others have pointed out, avoidance of parenting can be accomplished, a few ways. "Deciding to have children" should come before,, " the test came up + "..... and if done that way, a pattern of sensible responsibity should get shared, into the children of such parents...as they are raised, from children to adults.... We got on that path, in 1983...She is in her 5th year as a Jr.High Social Studies Teacher!!as for today?????... well i dunno... tough world, If you can manage HAVE kids,,, if it is not Completety right..... for YOU... then DON'T... Both paths have come to be very well accepted with the general public...Choice means choice... a much more progressive approach should be made, in the way of educating people, that MORE kids, is NOT the answer...and that all types of 'single-parenting'... can increase the workload , X 4 ... I read the entire thread , good posts from All... quades matter -of -fact statements, mirror my take on things, to a certain degree....We DO need to be thinking in terms of "social responsibilty" and common sense... But, , i ALSO am , someone who chose to be a parent, got lucky,, stayed the course, and did it with a good partner...So I endorse parenting.. but remember.... It's Seriou$$$$$$$ !!!jmy uspa 9452 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
