turtlespeed 226 #1 October 31, 2005 ... sort of . . . Now you people listen to this because I'm not going to repeat myself again. I banged her like a cheap gong. I nailed her ass to my oak desk in the Oval Office. Yes, I left "That Woman" oiled and soiled on the Presidential Seal. I'm only sorry the Paula Jones lawyers made me lie about it. I didn't want to cause my family any pain (OK, maybe just a little for that bitch Hillary.) but this isn't my fault. The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy put Monica Lewinsky, three goats, two donkeys and a midget in a raincoat in the Oval Office. They even flew in the 55-gallon drum of whip cream and rubber sheets. Could you have resisted this temptation or are you one of them people that hate us folks from Arkansas? Today, I was asked questions in the Grand Jury no one should have to answer. "Did Monica Lewinsky inhale?" "Did you promise not to cum on her dress?" "Do you really have 'Hello, Sailor!' tattooed on you ass?" I may have misled the American people but it's really Ken Starr's fault. After 4 years and $40 million all he has to show for his investigation is this crummy apology. If you can't put this behind us, then maybe me and 1000 FBI files can. Hold it. Rewind the tape. I have a better idea. It's all Hillary's fault. She hired Monica Lewinsky and Linda Tripp to setup an "Adultery Trap" so she could divorce me. Yeah, that's the ticket. Hey, you behind the camera. I'm ready now. Let's roll it. I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rwieder 0 #2 October 31, 2005 If it doesn't fit, you must aquit! -Richard- "You're Holding The Rope And I'm Taking The Fall" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #3 October 31, 2005 Quote If it doesn't fit, you must aquit! [Wink] .. or use some lube. Speed Racer -------------------------------------------------- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SudsyFist 0 #4 October 31, 2005 QuoteQuote If it doesn't fit, you must aquit! [Wink] .. or use some lube. I carry a small Exacto Knife for the occasional compulsory field episiotomy. Self lubes, too! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rebecca 0 #5 October 31, 2005 AGGGHHH!! AGHHHHH!!! That's just soo.... AGGGGGHHHHh!!!! you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel loquacious?' -- well do you, punk? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rickjump1 0 #6 November 1, 2005 Maybe that's why so many contributed to his double-wide, spa/massage parlor, Presidential Library.Do your part for global warming: ban beans and hold all popcorn farts. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AlexCrowley 0 #7 November 1, 2005 TV's got them images, TV's got them all, nothing's shocking. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sinker 0 #9 November 2, 2005 QuoteQuoteQuote If it doesn't fit, you must aquit! [Wink] .. or use some lube. I carry a small Exacto Knife for the occasional compulsory field episiotomy. Self lubes, too! Wow. I'm amazed at some of the shit you come up w/, suds. -the artist formerly known as sinker Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
