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CornishChris

Sky News get it right!

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OK, I'll play with some more breaking news...

Coming Home
Thousands of Texas residents are heading back home in the wake of Hurricane Rita, even though officials are urging them not too. Citizens are being warned that if they do return home, Anderson Cooper or another CNN reporter may try to make them cry.

Minimal Damage
It turns out most major oil refineries suffered little or no damage from Hurricane Rita, which should send gas prices lower. But service station owners vow to make up the difference by charging $5 for bags of M&M's for the foreseeable future.

Louisiana's Quest
Louisiana Governor Kathleen Babineaux Blanco is expected to ask Congress for $31 billion in aid this week. The money would be used to repair flood damage, rebuild levees, and reduce the number of vowels in her name.

Bush-Military
In the wake of the recent hurricanes, President Bush says whether the Pentagon should be used to rescue people in a disaster is something for Congress to consider. But the President reserves the right to be the sole person to decide when to use the Pentagon to kill people.

Iran Angry
Iran is upset with the U.N.'s decision to have the U.N. Security Council investigate the country's nuclear program, and says the move will make it much harder for Iranians to build nuclear weapons.

Weak Showing
Only about 400 people attended a rally in favor of the war in Iraq in Washington, D.C. Sunday. Organizers later realized they had made a terrible mistake by scheduling the event at the same time as Kmart's nationwide one-day sale on chewing tobacco and pork rinds.

Crime Rate
The nation's crime rate is still at a 30-year low. Experts say with gas and food prices so high, there's nobody left who's worth robbing.

Boeing Strike Over
Boeing and its machinists union have reached an agreement, ending a three-week strike. Now everyone at Boeing can get back to making jets for the airlines as soon as they find an airline that isn't bankrupt.

Mike:P

Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable.

Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode.

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:)
Nice

BTW: Has anyone else noticed that all of the little W stickers on cars are becoming rather rare? I commute 37 miles each way every day and I used to see those on about 1:10 cars. This morning there wasn't one to be found.



yeah...same with the john kerry stickers...i know! is it because the election is over? is it because stickers aren't indestructable? is it because all of those people now hate bush?

yeah...must be that last one...that seems to be the most logical choice. :D
"Don't talk to me like that assface...I don't work for you yet." - Fletch
NBFT, Deseoso Rodriguez RB#1329

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