Smile - Turtle Joke

[turtlespeed 226]

> Suturing a laceration on the hand of a 70-year-old Massachusetts business
>tycoon, a doctor and his patient were talking about Senator John Kerry possibly
>being in the White House one day.
>
>The old tycoon said, "Well, ya know, Kerry is a 'post turtle'."
>
>Not knowing what the his patient meant by that, the doctor inquired what a
>post turtle was.
>
> The old man said, "You know, when you're driving down a country road and
>you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, well that's a post
>turtle." Seeing a puzzled look on the doctor's face, he continued to explain,
>"You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get
>anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor stupid
>helpless idiot get down."

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[turtlespeed 226]

And another . . . .

>Recently while going through an airport during one of his many trips,
>President Bush encountered a man with silver hair, wearing a white robe and sandals,
>holding a staff.
>
>President Bush went up to the man and said, "Aren't you Moses?"
>
>The man never answered but just kept staring ahead.
>
>Again the President said, "Moses!" in a loud voice.
>
>The man just kept staring ahead, never answering the president.
>
>Soon a secret service agent came along and President Bush grabbed him and
>said, "Doesn't this man look like Moses to you?"
>
>The secret service agent agreed with the President.
>
>"Well," said the President, "Every time I say his name, he just keeps staring
>ahead and refuses to speak. Watch!"
>
>Again, the President yelled, "Moses!" and again the man stared ahead.
>
>The secret service man went up to the man in the white robe and whispered,
>"You look just like Moses. Are you Moses?"
>
>The man leaned over and whispered, "Yes, I am Moses. But the last time I
>talked to a bush, I spent 40 years wandering in the desert!"

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[Nightingale 0]

ROFLMAO.

I heard the post-turtle one about Bush instead of Kerry, with the reference to "helping him get down" meaning vote him out of office. I guess the joke works no matter what name you plug in, tho.

[quade 4]

Ever Google one of these internet/email jokes?

Check it out. It's amazing how fast they spread and how quickly they mutate.

http://www.google.com/search?q=joke+turtle+can't+get+him+down&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

[jerry81 10]

Quote

> Suturing a laceration on the hand of a 70-year-old Massachusetts business
>tycoon, a doctor and his patient were talking about Senator John Kerry possibly
>being in the White House one day.
>
>The old tycoon said, "Well, ya know, Kerry is a 'post turtle'."
>
>Not knowing what the his patient meant by that, the doctor inquired what a
>post turtle was.
>
> The old man said, "You know, when you're driving down a country road and
>you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, well that's a post
>turtle." Seeing a puzzled look on the doctor's face, he continued to explain,
>"You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get
>anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor stupid
>helpless idiot get down."

I think that makes more sense when it's actually about the president. Perhaps you should wait a few months before spreading this one.

---

[kallend 2,151]

What a load of Bush-it

...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

[turtlespeed 226]

Do you need help down too John?

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[kallend 2,151]

Quote

Do you need help down too John?

No thanks, I have a Stiletto 150.

...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Quote

> Suturing a laceration on the hand of a 70-year-old Massachusetts business
>tycoon, a doctor and his patient were talking about Senator John Kerry possibly
>being in the White House one day.
>
>The old tycoon said, "Well, ya know, Kerry is a 'post turtle'."
>
>Not knowing what the his patient meant by that, the doctor inquired what a
>post turtle was.
>
> The old man said, "You know, when you're driving down a country road and
>you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, well that's a post
>turtle." Seeing a puzzled look on the doctor's face, he continued to explain,
>"You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get
>anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor stupid
>helpless idiot get down."

You suck, Turtle!! I posted that one on May 24th in a thread that was just for you, you re-poster!!

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[turtlespeed 226]

I must have been drunk again.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun