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cyberskydive

Dear Friends

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This is a chain letter I got the other day...thought it was mildly amusing...
Hello, my name is Jay Hyman. I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding
50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually
believe that if you send them on, a poor 6-year- old girl in Arkansas with
a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money
to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling
freak show.
Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone
to whom you send "his" email, $1000? How stupid are we?
"Ooooh,looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get
laid by every Playboy model in the magazine!" What a bunch of bullshit.
Basically, this message is a big FUCK YOU to all who have nothing
better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards. Maybe the evil
chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in
my sleep for not continuing a chain that was started by Peter in 5 AD
and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower. Fuck
them.
If you're going to forward something, at least send me something
mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest
friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow
receive
a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't
fucking care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing
to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's your own unpopularity.
The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave
you
shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny,
send it
on. Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in
Botswana with
no teeth who has been tied to a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only
salvation is
the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email. Now forward
this to
everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn
carnivorous
and will consume your genitals.
"I'll jump anything!"

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