Pretty good funny....

[freeflir29 0]

A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory.
The personnel manager explains her duties, and tells her to report to
work
promptly at 8:00 AM. The next day at 8:45 AM, there's a knock at the
personnel manager's door. The assembly line foreman comes in and starts
ranting about this new employee. He says she's incredibly slow, and the
whole line is backing up.
The foreman takes the personnel manager down to the factory floor to
show
him the problem. Sure enough, Elmos are backed up all over the place.
At
the end of the line is the new employee.She has a roll of the material
used
for the Elmos and a big bag of marbles. They both watch as she cuts a
little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles, and starts sewing
the
little package between E! lmo's legs. The personnel manager starts
laughing
hysterically.
After several minutes, he pulls himself together,
walks over to the woman, and says, "I'm sorry, I guess
you misunderstood me yesterday. Your job is to give
Elmo two test tickles
Que hermana pinocha gratis?-Clay

[Divadiver 0]

Well done! That was cute as hell!
Now if we can only get someone to help poor Ken out!
Diva

[FallinWoman 1]

Good one Clay!!!

[sunshine 2]

A man went into the proctologist's office for his first exam. The doctor told him to have a seat in the examination room and that he would be with him in just a few minutes. When the man sat down and began observing the tools he noticed there were three items on a stand next to the exam table.

A tube of K-Y jelly;
A rubber glove; and
A beer.
When the doctor finally came in the man said, "Look Doc, I'm a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for, and I know what the glove is for, but can you tell me what the BEER is for?"
At that the doctor became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the the door. The doc flung the door open and yelled to his nurse.......
Dammit, Helen! I said a BUTT LIGHT
Your ears look cold. Can I warm them with my thighs?

[flyinryan 0]

LOL
Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha

[RedBull 0]

This cracked me up:
Weeeeeeeeeee!!
"You can't drink all day...Unless you start in the morning." -- Gary Larson

[rhoni 0]

Oh my gosh. My hubby downloaded this a couple of weeks ago. He and his keyboard player think it's hilarious! And my four year old son walks around going "Wheeee!" (Of course he also jumps out of the car and says "Look! Its like I'm jumping out of a plane!")
Rhoni

[Divadiver 0]

Someone please warn me next time before I download something like that. Just as I clicked play, someone from the Justice Department popped their head into my office while there was a dancing wanger on my screen!!!
Diva (add another to the most embarrassing moments)

[sunshine 2]

Note to self: "never open anything from a skydiver while at work!!"
Your ears look cold. Can I warm them with my thighs?

[PhreeZone 20]

No kidding, just look at how opening a picture of someones desktop can get you in trouble
A rainy day at the DZ is better then a Sunny day at work

[Divadiver 0]

It was bad enough when the guy introduced himself being with the Justice Dept. (visions of Clintonradloff leading him to me flashed through my mind), but when the wanger started dancing around and the guy starts over to my desk to write a note, I nearly pissed myself!
It was a close call.
Diva

[RedBull 0]

Oops! I didn't mean to get anyone into trouble.
Weeeeeee!! (warning: contains "dancing wanger") LOL!
"You can't drink all day...Unless you start in the morning." -- Gary Larson

[freeflir29 0]

Hey....anything with a photo of Ron Jeremy in it is bound to be funny....Que hermana pinocha gratis?-Clay

[SkyDekker 1,465]

That was funny, reaqding the posts I thought I'd better go and close my office door. Sure enough, my boss knocks on the door...... I just can't win.
This guy walks into a bar, sits down and asks the bartender for a double scotch, straight. The bartender poors him the drink and watches the guy slam back the drink and comments on the fact that he looked like he really needed the drink and asked him what the problem was.
The guy asked for another double and started explaining how he found his wife in bed with his best friend. The bartender agrees with him that he could use a couple of drinks and as he poors the man his third shot asks him what he did. The guy says:"I told my wife to get the f**k out of the house and to never come back". The bartender replies that he can understand that.
Then he asks, what did you say to your best friend? The guy replies:"I got right in his face and said..............bad boy, bad boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"