This'll make you groan...

[R00tj00se 0]

Apologies to the scots:
> An Englishman is being shown around a Scottish hospital.  At the end of
the
> tour he is shown into a ward with a number of patients who show no signs
of
> injury.  He goes to examine the first man he sees, and the man proclaims:
> "Fair fa' yer honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the puddin' race!".
>
> The Englishman, somewhat taken aback, goes to the next patient, who
> immediately launches into "Some hae meat, and canna eat, and some wad eat
> that want it, But we hae meat and we can eat, and sae the Lord be
thankit."
>
> The next patient sits up and declaims: "Wee sleekit cow'rin tim'rous
> beastie, O what a panic's in thy breastie! Thou need na start awa sae
hasty,
> wi' bickering bl'attle.  I wad be laith to run and chase hee, wi'
murdering
> prattle."
>
> "Well," says the Englishman to his Scottish colleague, "I see you saved
the
> psychiatric ward for the last."
>
> "No, no" the Scottish doctor corrects him, "This is the Serious Burns
Unit."