People are emailing me Aggiedave stories

[mnischalke 0]

In a crowded city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman waiting for a bus was wearing a tight mini skirt. As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again, she tried to make the step only to discover she still couldn't.
So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step, and, once again, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more and again was unable to.
About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus. She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and yelled, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!"
The Texan smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you've unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we were friends."
mike
A bucket of Jet A can heat an entire county if burned all at once.

[AggieDave 6]

HAHAHAHA!
Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.-General George Patton-

[flyingferret 0]

ROFLMAO

[Jessica 0]

I know a few AggieDave stories, too.
Pet me! I'm harmless and cute!

[flyingferret 0]

SHHSHSHS.....I dont want to hear those.
I am not listening, I am not listening.......

[PalmettoTiger 1]

I can't remember where I first saw this story but it's pretty hilarious.
I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men & women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing. And, I never have figured out why men think with their heads and women with their hearts. And, I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do."
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, but she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??" So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dreads. She explains that I "must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a Woman." I'm thinking, "What was her first clue?" I finally realize that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to bed.
The very next day we went shopping at a big unnamed department store...I walked around while she tried on three very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take all three of them. She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth $200 each to which I say OK.
And then we go to the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings. Let me tell you ...she was so excited. She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she cared. I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet because she doesn't even play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK to buy it.
She was really excited from all of this - you could tell by her expression when she said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash register." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No, honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff now." You should have seen her face ... it went completely blank. I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I put on a hurt face and pouted, "You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a Man."
/puts on flame-retardant suit
PTiger

[freeflir29 0]

I love that one. It's probably as close as men and women will ever come to understanding each other. Now can I find a Chic that isn't nuts?
"I got some beers....Let's Drink em!!!"
Clay

[skyhawk 2]

yer you can but any money they will have a restraining order on you in 1/2 an hour :)
(o)(o)

[freeflir29 0]

"have a restraining order on you in 1/2 an hour :)"
Unfortunately it's been the other way around lately!!!! "It's the cans..they're defective. Stay away from the cans"-Steve Martin
Clay

[skyhawk 2]

what u been putten restrainen orders on hot chicks, you do post to much lol :)
(o)(o)

[freeflir29 0]

"what u been putten restrainen orders on hot chicks"
I have this talent for attracting the psycho ones that won't stop calling my house and come up with the most imaginative reasons as to why I should talk to them....*shrug*
"It's the cans..they're defective. Stay away from the cans"-Steve Martin
Clay

[skyhawk 2]

one word
women lol
(o)(o)